Tag Wedding

Weddings Gone Wild . . . well, sort of.

Michael 1 Comment

Another June has gone.  Throughout the world there have been probably millions of women transformed into traditional June brides.  We’ve been fortunate enough to experience a few of their transformations.

Early in the month we attended a beautiful outdoors ceremony.  We think the ceremony might have been conducted by a Catholic priest but he might have been Episcopal.  The services are similar.  Had there been a complete mass we would have had a firmer grasp on it.  Whoever he was, he officiated over a beautiful ceremony for a beautiful young couple with as many blessings as one could extend in such setting.  We then walked through the garden to the reception, dinner, and dancing as we toasted the new couple.

At another June wedding we watched another couple joined by an Apache spiritual leader who was also licensed to perform weddings in a state some many hundreds of miles from where one traditionally thinks of when one thinks of traditional Apache holy men.  Again it was a beautiful ceremony and concluded with a traditional Apache blessing for the new couple who can claim native Americanism only because both were born in America.  We then moved from one room in the hotel to another for a cocktail reception, and then to another for dinner and dancing.

Some few days after that there was another wedding at a restaurant and after “I do” was uttered to bride and groom on the patio outside, everyone moved inside and stuck around for what restaurants are known and the couple hosted dinner for all.  Some time before that we were at another wedding performed by a judge in his courtroom.  It was appropriate since both bride and groom were (and still are) lawyers.  The party then crossed the street to move from courtroom to ballroom where the party got started.  Then there was the wedding in the park performed among the trees.  After the happy couple became an official couple the male part fired up the grill while the female part got the music going.

Throughout the world there have been probably millions of women transformed into traditional June brides.  These were a few of them.  We don’t think these were the traditional June wedding.  But then, traditions shift over time.  Traditions only become traditions because they are expected and are continued. Maybe we only have the expectation part left.  We thought we’d have seen at least one of our most recent weddings in a church with an organ and the long walk down a center aisle.

We don’t want to be preachy about it but maybe the preachers of the world better get on their sticks or next June we might not even notice.  We’ll always have the traditional June bride.  Just not the traditional June wedding.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

PS to all the June brides past, present, and future.  Don’t mind us poking a bit of fun.  At the end of the day if you’re married to the one you love, then the wedding was a success.  And that’s what we really think.  Really.

 

Relatively Speaking

Michael Leave a comment

Not long ago we mentioned we had a small handful of wedding events over just a couple of weeks.  We know the story that implies if it weren’t for weddings and funerals, nobody would ever see any relatives.  We also know there are some relatives who are probably best left uncovered except for the special occasions.  Then there are other relatives who can’t be put away.  Ever.  And then there are those who fall into the “Over there, two tables away, in the blue dress.  Who is she?” category.  Those are today’s topic.

One of our events was a rehearsal dinner.  What was once a nice, civilized way of getting some quality time with the happy couple, their parents, and the rest of the wedding party has grown up to become a mini-family reunion .  Some of the other but still closer members of the family are now joining the traditional rehearsing folk for an extra dose of fellowship among family members.

Whether at the newly expanded rehearsal dinner, the traditional family reunion, the now in season graduation party, or the unconstrained Christmas open house, we are finding ourselves in more situations wondering, “Over there, two tables away, in the blue dress.  Who is she?”

We have the solution.  Of course we do.  We never bring up something for which we don’t already have an answer.  That’s one of the perks of knowing the question before anybody else.  The solution of course is the use of name tags.  Yes, we know that some families already have discovered this and already use name tags.  These are different.  These include the connection between guest and point person of honor.  For example, at our attended function, She of We’s name tag would read “She, Aunt of Groom.”  At a graduation party, one might read “He, second cousin of father of graduate.”   At a family reunion where there is not always the central character that drives the reason for the party, there are always characters enough who everybody in the extended family will know or remember.  There it might read, “He, son of Cleo, the older one who took that job on the barge when everybody said she was being an asp for doing.”

On the other hand, as long as the party isn’t too big, sometimes it’s fun to wonder, ““Over there, two tables away, in the blue dress.  Who is she?”  This is especially true when the entire  table gets involved with the discussion of just who she is.  It’s exceptionally especially true if there is somebody at the table who knows the lady in the blue dress and the others can convince him or her that is wrong and the lady in the blue dress is really someone else.

We know some people will just go up to the lady in the blue dress, politely handle some obviously needed introductions, and go on to apologize for not remembering right from the start. Some would say that’s the right thing to do.

Yeah, but being right around the relatives is sometimes overrated anyway.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

Weddings Held Hostage

Michael Leave a comment

A few weeks ago we read in the local paper a feature article on the growing trend of couples so to be married not registering at the local silversmith shop but on line where guests and regretters can chose to fund pieces of their honeymoon.  Although this trend has been trending for a while, we are somewhat uncertain as to how we feel about it.  There was a time not too long ago when a couple who didn’t want gifts included “No Gifts Please” on their invitations.  A few guests felt then, and a few probably still feel now, that bringing a gift was their obligation and brought one anyway.  Virtually everyone else who attended would instead bring a card stuffed with money, gift cards, or trade secrets.  Apparently cash isn’t considered a gift by giver or receiver.

But today, no gifts means “we’re on a budget and if we want to make those reservations at Emeril’s we need to know if we’re going to be able to afford it.  Since we know we can’t on our own, we’re looking for someone to pony up the bucks for if for us so we can book our table now.”

As we perused deeper into that article we read of a couple that was opting for the honeymoon registry because they will be doing a destination wedding and couldn’t afford both trips.  It was here that we stopped and decided we didn’t like either idea.

The destination wedding has been around for generations.  It used to be called elopement.  Two people wanted to be married with little pomp given whatever their circumstance and fled the hometown, returning a weekend later ready to have people over to ooh and aah at the rings.  Now, either due to remarkable greed or extraordinary selfishness, couples are deciding that just because they’ve always wanted to get married on the beach, or the mountaintop, or the canopy of a rain forest, they don’t want to give up 200 of their closest friends and the accompanying gifts.  So they just move the wedding elsewhere and hope the most prosperous follow and the rest send checks with their regrets.

We love celebrating friends’ life changes.  Only a nw baby can be a bigger change than a new marriage.  And as such we hate to ever have to consider sending regrets.  But if two people were to tell us that in order to celebrate with them we have to give up our vacation time and savings to go where we hadn’t planned, we’d be quite regretful.  If those same people then said, “While you’re figuring out how to come up with the time and money to get to our wedding, go take a look at our website and see what parts of our honeymoon you’d like to finance,” we’d say, “Ummm, really sorry.”

Our gift is given to provide pleasure to the receiver and to make them think of the special connection between us, not to make them think of how many more pledges they need for the snorkel package.  Destination weddings and honeymoon registries?  It might be a little old fashioned but we’re beginning to think that if a couple doesn’t want to get married at home among friends and family and doesn’t want gifts at the reception afterwards, maybe they should consider eloping.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?