Yesterday was the 56th anniversary of the first manned moon landing. We can land a man on the moon but we still can’t come up with a good way to end a text message. It’s also the 58th anniversary of the first Special Olympics. And still after all this time I can’t come up with a good way to work that into a referene on the absence of a good way to end a text message. Then again on the other hand, we’v had text messages for 41 years old and I still can’t come up with a good way to end a text message. I think I have a texting dysfunction.(Technically texting is 33 years old. It was invented in 1984 but not first used until 1992. I guess they had a hard time coming up with a good way to say hello.)

Having been born and raised in the telephone era, the transition to short messaging systems has been long and difficult. All these abbreviations and pictures with no punctuation. Anarchy I tell you!

To be very frank, I’m still not comfortable with the habit of just jumping into the conversation. No “Hello, how are you?” “Are you busy?” “Hey, s’up!” How do people think it’s appropriate to start off a conversation with “on my way,” or “be there soon,” or worst of all, “omw.” But having gotten beyond that I still can’t just stop. It’s like just getting out of— hmmm, its like sending a card that just says happy birthday and not signing it because the recipient should be able to figure it who it’s from by checking the postmark.

Closing a phone call is easy. “Bye,” Bye.” And you’re done. Messages seldom end that cutly and dryly. Oh, someone might get a “but” in but usually it’s as abrupt as it started and I’m not sure if they’re done so I poo back on and say something to see if they’re still there.  And so on and so on and son on.

You may need shaking your head and quietly chuckling over this, but I know it’s a problem, a real problem, and others experience it too. I know because I got into a text message conversation yesterday afternoon with another who couldn’t say goodbye and we finally got around to “hanging up” around 9:30 last night. It’s a good thing we don’t have to pay for those things individually anymore.