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Movie Along – or – There’s Nothing to See Here

Michael Leave a comment

Thanksgiving just isn’t the same holiday as it used to be.  Used to be just sitting around eating with friends and family.  Used to be the day one would rest up for the assault on the Christmas sales the upcoming weekend.  Used to be parades and football.  And it used to be the evening when all the Christmas movies and specials would hit the airways and America would fall asleep in front of “It’s a Wonderful Life” having just experienced part of one.  It’s time for another tradition to bite the dust.

Where did all the Christmas movies go?  It didn’t take a very long look at the TV listings for last Thursday to see an absence of any cinematic welcome to the Yule season. Oh, there were movies.  “Jurassic Park,” “Maverick,” “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,” “Eight Men Out,” and “Tora! Tora! Tora!,” all good movies but not a Christmas Tree among them, were featured by the broadcast and basic cable stations.  No “Miracle on 34th Street,” no “Christmas Vacation,” not even a “Fred Claus” was beamed into living rooms on Thanksgiving.  There must have been too many shoppers out looking for Thursday Night Pre-Black Friday Specials for the networks to take a chance on making the Christmas movie season opener special.

Certainly sometime in the next 25 days we will see all of the “Home Alone” offerings, a “White Christmas,” and several versions of a “Christmas Carol.” If one makes an effort to see them one will see them.  Otherwise there will be snippets gleaned while cookies are baked, presents are bought, packages are wrapped, and cards are signed.

Maybe that’s the tradition.  Not so much the movies but the memories of them while the hustle and bustle of the season grabs the biggest part of our attention.  We’re living in a time when time is more valuable than most of what we do with it.  And Christmas is the time when time is at its dearest.  There is more of everything in this last month of the year.  It might be the only time that our houses look different with seasonal decorations.  We spend most of our disposable income right now.  More of us go to more churches and services than any other time of the year.  We plan, attend, and even avoid some of the only parties of the year right now.  We even know we have to bake cookies but we aren’t sure why.

Whether it’s with the memories, the movies, or the cookies, Thanksgiving still starts the Christmas season.  Make of it what you will.  It’s your time.  Even if you choose to spend it watching “The Poseidon Adventure” and swear it really is a Christmas movie.  There’s even a tree in it.

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

(To see some of our favorite Christmas movies, go to “And the Winner is…” from December 24, 2011.)

 

In Pursuit of (a Thankful) Perfection

Michael 1 Comment

A few years ago He of We included in the Thanksgiving blessing thanks to God for making the family somewhat dysfunctional.  After all the relatives were done gasping and sputtering he explained that the imperfections are what keep the family together as we all support those who need it when they need it.  A few weeks ago on some television show he heard the head of the household give his fictional blessing thanking God for his imperfect family.  After all the relatives were done gasping and sputtering he explained that the imperfections are what keep the family together as they support those who need it when they need it.  Somebody has been paying attention.

What fun is it if everybody gets along all the time?  How would anybody grow if there was never an incentive to be better tomorrow than one is today?  Isn’t part of giving thanks improving from year to year – from day to day even?  Otherwise it’s just an exercise for everybody else to conform to one person’s idea of normal, regardless of how abnormal that normal may be – or might even be is.

Once upon a time all of the traditions that we hold so dear on Thanksgiving weren’t.  They weren’t traditions, they weren’t habits, they might not have even been normal.  But they stuck.  For some reason everybody decided that on Thanksgiving we would have turkey and stuffing with cranberry dressing.  Turkeys are impossible to cook properly, cranberries are the sourest of all the fall fruits we could possibly pick, and to quote a well know TV celebrity chef, stuffing is evil.  Somehow, this terrible trio became the standard for our most family-centric holiday.

Eventually we learned how to prep that bird so it stayed juicy throughout cooking, figured out how to sweeten those bog berries, and learned that you could make a stuffing that actually cooked all the way through when you do it in Pyrex rather than poultry.  The imperfections guided our practices to make a new normal.

So this week when you are practicing your blessing, think about not just what you are thankful for but what you’d wish you could change.  Then be thankful that you might get the chance to change them.

Who knows, maybe someday our Thanksgiving feast will start at 9 in the morning so one can be first in line at the Pre-Black-Friday Sale as part of a new tradition.  Yeah, right.

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Everything Old Is New Again

Michael Leave a comment

It’s that most wonderful time of the year again.  Well, it’s that time of the year again.  That time when every department store has a CD player in the shape of a 1950s jukebox, every home improvement store has next to the high tech LED lights those big C-3 bulbs, and every video department has “Miracle on 34th Street,” “It’s a Wonderful Life” and “Frosty the Snowman.”  Yes, it’s retro time!

Retro is an interesting concept.  Can’t come up with an original idea?  Retro it!  Can’t come up with a winning idea?  Retro it!  Can’t come up with any idea that won’t get you fired before the holiday breaks?  Retro it!  And quite often it works.

There truly is more right than wrong when it comes to retro.  Consider these.  Look at all of the retro car designs that have hit the road in the past few years.  The underpinnings were new but the looks from the Chevy HHR to the Ford Mustang were based on clear winners from the past.

Check out some of the most recent movies to hit the big screens.  “Walk Among the Tombstones” released a couple of months ago is based on a Lawrence Block novel published in 1992.  The Bond flick “Casino Royale” from 2006 was written in 1967.  The upcoming “Imitation Game” is based on the 1983 publication The Enigma.

Entire television networks have been built around classic television shows from the 50s, 60s, and 70s.    Feel free to consider this as retro-programming.  Sometimes the networks will even run original commercials with the shows.  Now that’s retro!

Fashion, furniture, and architecture are rediscovering styles from a generation or two past.  Classic art is experiencing a resurgence in galleries and at auctions.  Even food is going retro.  The hottest meat in town is buffalo – that would be burgers, not wings.  And they are being sold out of trucks a la Mr. Softee.  Modern is taking some time off so we can appreciate what was.

Obviously there is much more right with retro than there is wrong.  It’s the seasonal stuff that one sees in catalogs and weekly ad flyers that give retro a certain queasiness.  You can’t even make a cheap imported CD player look like a classic jukebox let alone create the feel of a 1950s diner in your family room just because now you can play Lady Gaga in a plastic box with an arched top and blinking lights.  So let’s leave the retro to those who know what they are doing and how to develop it for today’s markets.

Now if you really want to gift your favorite bloggers with a 1950s style jukebox, type “Jukebox for sale” into your favorite search engine. Skip the results that start with “CD” and peruse the remaining offerings.  There’s a corner in the family room ready to go.

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Children of the Candy Corn

Michael 2 Comments

Listen up everyone.  Today, as is October 30 of every year, is National Candy Corn Day!  And you thought you had to wait for the last day of the month for the only good holiday in October.

Candy corn is good stuff.  Butter, sugar, honey.  What more could you ask for?  Add some food coloring and a little more than an hour of your time and you have the ultimate fall candy.  Better still, hop on down to the grocery store and buy packs of the stuff in a little more than a minute.

Some of you reading this might remember making or getting home made candy and treats for Halloween.  Candy corn, candied apples, fudges, cookies, popcorn balls, and gooey nut clusters were classics where kids would memorize the houses for year to year gratification.  Then some psychopath decided it was a good idea to stick razor blades in apples and now all any self-respecting parent will let a child keep is whatever comes sealed by the manufacturer.

Today if you want home made you better hope that a very generous soul invites you to his or her (or their) house party. Or, bring back the traditions and make your own for your own.  Nothing wrong with that.  And you control the ingredients.  Perhaps a splash of rum added to the popcorn balls’ caramel paste or some bourbon infused marshmallows to hold the nut clusters together.  Maybe bobbing for apples in a barrel of Riesling.  Now that’s a party!

But back to the candy corn.  Yes it’s fall and yes the ultimate is chowing down on those little kernels usually before they even hit the candy dish.  But there is so much more one can do with these a-maize-ing treats.  Sprinkle them on your cupcakes like, well like sprinkles.  Let them play with your cereals either in your Rice Krispy treats or Chex mixes.  Add them to a batch of chocolate chip cookies.  Mix them with the peanuts before adding that whole kit and caboodle to popcorn and caramel for an even sweeter popcorn ball.

And finally, three words that will serve you well for the entire fall season:  Candy Corn and Prosecco.  It doesn’t get any better than that.

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Let’s Be Careful Out There

Michael Leave a comment

The great candy/costume countdown has begun!  Depending on where you live it could be just 4, 5, or 6 short days till Treat or Treat Night.  We’d say till Halloween but that’s always October 31 no matter what calendar you’re using.  Why the varied time spans?  Because October 31 (Halloween, remember) is on a Friday this year.  We don’t know about where you are but here that’s high school football playoff time.

So people don’t have to decide between the lessor of the two evils (or greater of the two hauls), many municipalities within school districts involved in the playoffs are opting to move one or the other.  Since football is an immovable feast, Trick or Treat is the one to go.  It seems like that might confuse the ones who are the most excited about Trick or Treating (Halloween party attendees excluded).  Those would be the little ones, the same little ones who watch the television sit coms and specials that feature their stars Trick or Treating on Halloween – a sort of novel concept for this year.

A quick check on the Internet revealed that at least 26 communities in our county (out of 100+) are holding onto tradition, including both He and She’s. It just seems right that Trick or Treat happens on Halloween.

But there could be issues.  And not just football conflicts.  Most places allow Trick or Treating from 6 to 8pm.  Most football games start at 7.  There could be a mad rush at the beginning of the tour with folks hurrying to still make it to the games.  And it is a Friday.  There will be parties – house parties, office parties, bar parties.  All of them will have people rushing to and fro, mostly in SUVs way too big for just one person versus multiple children.   And then we’ll add that here our local weather forecast is calling for mild and clear all week long, except for Friday night when it will be cold and rainy.  Translation: it will be slippery and extra dark.

Even with the potential for problems Halloween fun belongs on Halloween, including Trick or Treat.  Kids are kids only once (Halloween party attendees excluded).  We just have to make sure that the potential for avoiding problems is stronger than the reverse.  Halloween night, it’s always a great evening for a neighborhood stroll – just be careful out there!

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Good Things, Small Spaces

Michael 2 Comments

“They” say good things come in small packages.  One of these days “they” are going to have to identify themselves so we can discuss these edicts!  Either that or provide comprehensive definitions per platitude.  Is a small place also akin to a small package?

Now don’t get me wrong, small spaces can be, and quite often are, fun.  Take the little red car.  It’s tons of fun.  Nothing beats top down driving on a cool fall day with the leaves falling around you – sometimes even on you.  But let’s be honest:  you sit right on top of the transmission so it’s hot even on the coldest day, the clutch has made a noise like a doggie squeeze toy since the day it was new, and speaking of the clutch and transmission it shifts harder than you’d think for a car that’s powered by an engine the size of a sewing machine.  But it’s more fun than any other means of transportation except perhaps the Orient Express in Ms. Christie’s most vivid imagination.

So what started these thoughts of the good and not so good of small spaces?  Last week I was at the hospital having some tests done.  Of course they were all scheduled for before the sun came up and after a few hours of poking, prodding, and internal picture taking, nature’s call was getting loud.

Restrooms in this hospital group’s buildings try to simulate the home setting.  There aren’t many of them and the ones available to the public are single seaters with cheerful wall paper, soft lighting, and normal sinks.  But in this home-style oasis, in a nod to minimizing cross contamination, everything is touchless.  Motion activated light switch, towel dispenser, soap dispenser, faucet, and toilet flusher live harmoniously with the faux marble and travertine tiles.

What could possibly be the down side of downsizing a public lavatory to the size of a homey bathroom?  Only the size.  It was so small that every time I moved in there something else did too:  paper towels rolled, soap splattered into the sink, and the toilet ran more than a long distance runner training for a marathon.  Everything took automatic to a whole new level, except for the faucet.  Being an offspring of those mounted to the rows of sinks in most major airports, it required me to just about climb into the sink before giving up any water.

But the thought was a good one.  And you know what?  Sometimes even when the not so good tips the scale way to its side, the good still wins.

Passages of Fall

Michael 1 Comment

Over the past week He of We noticed fallen leaves in yards while meandering through the neighborhood on his afternoon walk, She of We talked about getting her garden ready for next Spring’s plantings, Daughter of He contemplated buying new snow tires, and stores everywhere have Halloween candy out.  All of them are sure signs Fall is soon here.  But the surest sign of Fall to come isn’t any of these, it isn’t the shortened days and cooler nights, it isn’t the model year end clearance sales on the car lots.  Nope, the surest sign of the next season coming right around the corner is the Covered Bridge Festival!

Yes, there are still covered bridges in the country.  In use even.  Up in our corner of the country there are two neighboring counties that have a combined festival every year right at the start of Fall.  If you have the kind of time we did some years ago and wanted to make a quest of it, you can drive up to and over 30 of the covered bridges spanning (no pun intended) nearly 90 miles of quiet, rural roadway.  (It’s a perfect way to end the convertible season, although if you’ve read us for a while you’ve read posts that make it clear that we never really end convertible season.  But that’s a different story for a different day.)  At 17 of those bridges there will be vendors selling their autumnal decorations, local food booths, singers, dancers and other entertainers, chain saw carvers, quilt makers, and artists in almost every medium.

So why are we so excited over what seems to be just a giant craft show spread over 1,400 square miles?  Like most things we like there are the people.  Some of the most talented people display their talents at the bridges and nowhere else.  Others who are at other arts festivals actually get to spend time with visitors in a more relaxed setting.  Even though it is only 20 or so miles from home there are foods, sights, and sounds we only see the one day a year that we get to the bridges.  And if we miss a year, when the following year rolls around and the dates get closer, the anticipation grows even stronger.

It’s not so much that the Covered Bridges are from a simpler time.  In fact, they are from a harder time.  If we had a choice of trying to make a living in 1814 or 2014 we pick now.  But they are from a sturdier time.  These are bridges built in the early to mid 1800’s and they still work.  And most of the things that we’ve bought in their shadows still work too.  There’s an endorsement, even for a decoration.

And it’s always a great day to take a ride in the woods – and know we can’t get lost!

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

Reality Bytes

Michael Leave a comment

Every now and then reality gets in the way.  The reality is that He of We was in the hospital for a while and although we prepped a few posts to keep things up during the convalescence, they weren’t enough.  It happens.  Now that things are a bit better we’re going to try to get back on our regular schedule.  If we don’t, you’ll figure it out.  Back to reality!

—–

Our job is hard!  It shouldn’t be.  Staying grounded in reality should be easy, natural, a no-brainer.  Quantum physics is hard.  Criminal defense law is hard.  Matching coupons to weekly supermarket sales is hard.  Love is hard.  Reality?  Easy as pie.  Yeah, right.

When we started this blog reality was easy.  It was everything the reality TV shows weren’t.  Since then, it’s gotten complicated.  Did you know that there is a newspaper syndicate out there that was soliciting, postings, capturing votes for, and awarding prizes for pet selfies?  Who frames the picture?  Who sets the background?  Who works the shutter for Pete’s sake!?  When “they” say pets are people too, nobody really believes them.  Do they?  Even the camera app people?

On the other hand, here is something that reality might have right although we’re not sure why in this case.  Everyone has heard the tale that we should all smile more often.  After all, it takes something like 8,647 muscles to frown and only 2 to smile.  Alright, that’s a little exaggerated but who’s going to count?  The other day, He of We was laying n bed alternating smiling and frowning trying to count muscles.  (What can we say?  He has that kind of time right now.)  After a few rings around that one the score came up that indeed there are many more muscles involved in the frowning process than in smiling.  If you really concentrate at it you can actually feel the muscles take their positions.  Why would we be built this way?  It seems that smiling is much more beneficial than frowning so why is it so much harder?

Even today’s holiday is harder than reality should be.  For 120 years Americans have been celebrating the contributions including economic achievements that laborers make to the country by celebrating Labor Day.  But each year more people end up working that day (this day).  Because it breaks the boundary between summer and fall and off time and school time, Labor Day traditionally is celebrated by sales and clearances as much as by parades and picnics.

So there you have it.  Or them.  A few ponderables about reality.  Some things to think while you’re flipping burgers, smiling at the dog next door trying to get a good picture taken, before heading to the mall to find one last good clearance on some new walking shorts.  We tell you, this job is hard, but somebody’s got to do it!

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

Who Could Ask For Anything More

Michael 1 Comment

Every now and then we look forward to retirement.  Oh, that is going to be years and years away, but it’s nice to sit and dream.  It seems that there are lots of retired people we know who have jobs.  Retirement jobs.  They tend bar on the slow nights, they drive limos, or they sit behind the big desk being the building receptionist.

That got us to thinking, if we didn’t have to work for money to live on, what would be our ideal jobs.  She of We would like to make floral arrangements or on a grander scale, design gardens.  He of We wants to own a Dairy Queen.  Nice, quiet, safe jobs.

But then we got to thinking, sometimes one could have the nice, quiet, safe job from the worker perspective, but how about those jobs that from the patrons perspective are the perfect jobs.  (When we think, we think big.  Or at least different.)  So what are the jobs that nobody can ever complain about when they are the patrons?

Let’s start with the ice cream stand.  For the worker it can be a headache sometimes.  Lines of Little Leaguers waiting for their celebratory soft serve next to the lines of losers waiting for their consolation cone.  But even though there are lines and the workers are working up a sweat scooping out the good stuff, nobody in line at the Dairy Queen, et. al. is in a bad mood.  They know there will be a sweet treat for them at the end of their wait and they’re willing to wait it.  Much different from the lines at the driver license picture taking place.

It seems nobody ever gets stressed at a book store.  We know most everybody is saying that book stores are a dying business but while they are still breathing they are places where the customer is always tranquil.  What’s to be upset over?  Maybe a book is out of print. It could be a little disheartening and probably it could be found on the Internet anyway.  But at the bookstore, there’s someone there to pour over the computer screen, slogging through the search engines, looking for the elusive title.  All the while our intrepid customer is skimming the best sellers, having a cappuccino and colache, and listening to the CD samplers in the music section.

A place where stress is the norm for the worker but the patrons are de-stressed to the max is at the amusement park.  The employees at the parks have it rough.  They are standing many hours and standing those hours in hot sun.  If they aren’t standing they are leaning against hard metal chair-like props.  And for the poor souls who maintain rides that ride in circles there is always that trip out to the ride proper to clean up one of the few times the rider might be just a tad stressed.  But we love these worker bees.  With a punch of a button or a pull on a lever they do to us what amusement parks are intended to do.  They amuse.  And what can be better than that?

Yes, there are those jobs that are ideal jobs but really, how many of us get them anyway.  The better ideal jobs are the ones somebody else is doing that we think are ideal because of the benefits we reap.  That might be just a little selfish but don’t we get to be that sometime?  We vote yes!

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

 

No Two Are Alike

Michael Leave a comment

Lately we’ve been finding ourselves saying a lot, “She’s a flake, but really nice,” or “He a nice guy but flakey as high fiber breakfast cereal without the milk.”  We think we’ve figured out why.   They are the same!  Flakey and nice have the same attributes.  Check this out.

The really nice person is the one who says hello to everybody he or she passes.  The flake is the one who talks to complete strangers.

The really nice person is the one who smiles at whoever gets on the elevator.  The flake is one who always has that smile on his or her face and you can’t figure out why.

The really nice person is the one who takes impeccable messages at work even spelling the caller’s name correctly.  The flake is the one who’s always telling you in the lunch room that they know everybody you know/used to work with/went to school with/services your car.

The really nice person is the one who is always ready to help anyone move a box, a piece of furniture, or a side by side refrigerator.  A flake is the one who is always asking what you have in that box.

The really nice person will lend you his or her umbrella when you’re leaving work early and the clouds are starting to thicken.  The flake is the one with the psychedelic paisley print umbrella.  In golf size.

The really nice person always laughs at your jokes even when you know they aren’t funny.  The flake is the one who always laughs.  At anything.  Anytime.  Even during staff meetings with the big boss from out of town.

The really nice person “likes” your post on Facebook about trying to find the owner of the lost cat.  The flake has 37 cats.

See, they’re really the same person.  But that’s ok.  The world can use a few more nice people even if they are a little flakey.  And when you get down to it, the world can use a few more flakes to balance out the people who really do understand high fiber diets.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?