Sometime in a different century when mini-vans only held 7 passengers and only a couple of manufacturers even made mini-vans, one of the Chrysler divisions (that was back in the days when Plymouth was more than just a rock) highlighted in their advertisements that their mini-vans sported 10 cup holders.  This was in a vehicle that sat only seven people.  Why would any vehicle need more cup holders than passengers?

There are a few people who can manage to get from Point A to Point B and keep nothing in their cup holders other than sunglasses, spare change, or dust.  Those people are to be envied.  Last evening He of We was getting himself ready for the drive to work this morning and had to make sure that there was a bottle of water chilling in the refrigerator for that ride and that the travel mug’s lid was somewhere close to the travel mug, all while pondering if he should leave a few minutes early for a breakfast treat on the way in that would include a large iced tea.  Let’s see, that’s a 3 cup holder requirement for only one rider.

Not to be outdone, Daughter of He routinely leaves the house every morning with a coffee and a smoothie.  Another multi-cup cup holder needer.  (Someday we’ll explore the current smoothie world.  Back in the day when seven passenger vans sported 10 cup holders, smoothies called up images of fruit blended with ice or ice cream and were prone to cause cold headaches.  Today those same called things include nuts, berries, grains, seeds, yogurt, and juices.  They still have fruit but no ice cream.  What fun is that?  But back to the cup holders.)

This got us to thinking.  Just how many cup holders are there out there?  Out there being on the driveway.  He’s chariot has 8 cup holders and five seats.  Four of those cup holders are in the front seat.  The front seats that hold two people.  That’s two cup holders per person up front.  The still means that if He and Daughter of He were to car pool, there could be some days one may have to ride in the back just so there will be enough holders for all the cups.

So that brings us to the real quandary of this.  These two aren’t alone in their liquid refreshments commute.  He knows that because he has seen the occupants of other vehicles’ cup holders in his work’s parking spaces.  They are just as crowded.  So the question is: are all these people really drinking all that much just to get to work?  Is it a daily test of bladder control in preparation for the morning meetings?  Or is it just to have a variety available to match the commute’s traffic mood?  (And if it was going to be for that reason, why aren’t more of those cups holding a good shot of bourbon?  Um, passenger side only!)

Those guys in Detroit back in that former century might have had something.  Nobody talks of engine displacement or horsepower anymore.  Wheel size that once seemed so important is today’s unknown.  Gas mileage always shows up on the ads but it’s just a number to compare models.  The number of air bags pops up in commercials more often than price but neither of these is a big selling point.  Will they really make or break the deal?  But watch a dealer try to sell a car without a cup holder.  It might not be on the spec sheet but it will get asked about during the test drive!

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?