Tag Children

The Rotten Pot

Michael Leave a comment

The potpourri – a quite lovely arrangement of highly scented dried flowers used to decorate and perfume.  Or collection of songs or poems, or a mélange of thoughts, ideas, or fact.  Whatever you want to make of it, or make it from, it is a beautiful order of otherwise unrelated things. In fact, I have often used it in post titles when I have too little of any one thing rummaging around in my head to add up to a couple hundred words of lucid thinking thus keeping that post from getting too ugly. Until now.

Now we have the not so flattering side of the potpourri – it’s otherwise disagreeable origin. From seventeenth century French it is literally the “rotten pot.” And today is a collection of the rotten side of reality that stuck its ugly face in my path this week.

The major ingredient in this pot is “some people’s children.” Not once, not twice, but three times just since Sunday did I get to witness not one, not two, but three little monsters disturbing the peace and leaving it in pieces.

There was the 3 or 4 year old girl (or boy, at that age does it matter) who made her own potpourri while seated in a shopping cart and systematically pulled petal after petal from the bouquet of flowers I suppose that her mother left with her to keep her (the child) occupied while she (the mother) gave her order to the deli counter clerk (and who couldn’t contain herself (the clerk) and pointed out the impromptu de-blooming). And then there was the 6 or 7 year old girl who at the local party store walked through a full aisle of piñata, punching one after the other until she got bored with that, realized that mom was not within arm’s reach, and wailed at the approximate pitch and volume of an ambulance siren.

But the killer (could we wish) was the around six-ish boy (I think) who stood (yes stood!) on the conveyor belt at the supermarket checkout line while he (I think) systematically threw every item in the impulse rack above the belt onto the belt to his (hers?) mother’s chorus of “Please get back in the cart, get in the cart, get back in the cart, I’m telling you get back in the cart, this is the last time now get back in the cart, get in the cart, get in the cart.” When the cashier had the nerve to say “It’s all right,” I couldn’t just stand there idly at the next check-out line. I said “No, it’s not alright. It’s rude and disgusting. And it’s why I’m in this line because I’m certainly not putting my food on that belt and if I were you (now directed to the cashier) I’d have someone get over there and clean that up.” And I actually felt good about myself having said something until the mother said, “Like that belt was any too clean before.”

And that was my mélange of otherwise unrelated urges to kill.

That’s what I think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Some People’s Children

Michael Leave a comment

If you aren’t yet you should be looking forward to the day when you become the parent of an adult child.  Oh when you get down to it they really aren’t all that much different from the non-adult child.  Your parenting skills will still be questioned but then, so will their childrening skills.  Many of the issues you already faced yourself.  Most of the problems will be expected, if not actually anticipated, or at least remembered more clearly.  And usually more expensive.

We figure the expense of childhood issues is going to catch up with the little ones shortly.  It all has to do with the recent wave of television commercials portraying children as members of real families and part of the decision making process.  We’ve had kids in commercials since there have been commercials.  Millions of people know that “Mikey likes it” but probably have no idea exactly what it is that Mikey likes.  But Mikey was cute.  And even at today’s inflated prices, we’re talking about a $3.00 box of cereal.  Not a big budget buster.

No, today’s kids are pushing thousands, even hundreds of thousands of dollars in single transactions just by being, well, by being bad kids.  Let’s start with the youngest in the crowd who carries his blanket with him wherever he goes.  Big deal, lots of kids do that.  But this one seems to take great pride into turning his blanket into an ice cream bowl just for kicks.  Grandma scoops out a nice big portion of ice cream and the kid immediately and deliberately dumps it onto his blanket.  Here that blanket would have then been declared garbage and tossed out with the trash.  There Grandma chuckles and the kid wins.  Again, not a budget buster but far from Mikey’s cuteness and a harbinger of things to come.

Those are the small victories that give other commercial children the audacity to demand their way or the highway.  Take the dad and child off the highway and park them on the rim of the Grand Canyon.  One of the Seven Wonders of the World and the kid sits in the car with the look of “yeah, I’ve seen pictures, so what” across his face.  Dad tries to find a way to “get to” his child, finally deciding to drive his new $30,000 car onto a bison range.  There one of the furry beasts walks up next to the car, fogs the window, and the kid is finally impressed.  You can tell he’s impressed because the voice over tells us so, and for a mere $30,000, plus travel expenses and release statement, you too can impress your child.

Perhaps the greatest display of petulance is the 9-ish year old whose parents determine that he should be part of their spending upwards of a quarter of a million dollars on a house.  House after house they look.  House after house he becomes more and more irked at the selections.  What’s missing here?  Why does he not like any of these fabulous structures?  Because there aren’t any big trees where he can build a playhouse.  It’s not just a house; it’s where you raise your family.  Or so says the pleasant voice at the end of the commercial.  Yeah, right.  And in a year he’ll forget about the tree house and for the next 10 years resent all of the leaves his parents will “force” him to rake every fall.  Them and their darn big trees.

Trust us, you’ll welcome being the parent of an adult child when most of the problems are expected.  And maybe not even more expensive.

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Let’s Be Careful Out There

Michael Leave a comment

The great candy/costume countdown has begun!  Depending on where you live it could be just 4, 5, or 6 short days till Treat or Treat Night.  We’d say till Halloween but that’s always October 31 no matter what calendar you’re using.  Why the varied time spans?  Because October 31 (Halloween, remember) is on a Friday this year.  We don’t know about where you are but here that’s high school football playoff time.

So people don’t have to decide between the lessor of the two evils (or greater of the two hauls), many municipalities within school districts involved in the playoffs are opting to move one or the other.  Since football is an immovable feast, Trick or Treat is the one to go.  It seems like that might confuse the ones who are the most excited about Trick or Treating (Halloween party attendees excluded).  Those would be the little ones, the same little ones who watch the television sit coms and specials that feature their stars Trick or Treating on Halloween – a sort of novel concept for this year.

A quick check on the Internet revealed that at least 26 communities in our county (out of 100+) are holding onto tradition, including both He and She’s. It just seems right that Trick or Treat happens on Halloween.

But there could be issues.  And not just football conflicts.  Most places allow Trick or Treating from 6 to 8pm.  Most football games start at 7.  There could be a mad rush at the beginning of the tour with folks hurrying to still make it to the games.  And it is a Friday.  There will be parties – house parties, office parties, bar parties.  All of them will have people rushing to and fro, mostly in SUVs way too big for just one person versus multiple children.   And then we’ll add that here our local weather forecast is calling for mild and clear all week long, except for Friday night when it will be cold and rainy.  Translation: it will be slippery and extra dark.

Even with the potential for problems Halloween fun belongs on Halloween, including Trick or Treat.  Kids are kids only once (Halloween party attendees excluded).  We just have to make sure that the potential for avoiding problems is stronger than the reverse.  Halloween night, it’s always a great evening for a neighborhood stroll – just be careful out there!

Now that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you.

 

Too Much of a Good Thing

Michael Leave a comment

Don’t you just love it when one of life’s questions finally gets answered?  When that thing that has never been at the forefront of thought but always hovering around the subconscious is finally resolved? When you can finally say, “Oh, yeah.”

Both of We have three children.  All three of the Little We’s are in their 20’s, gainfully if not ideally employed, with their own cars, clothes, gym memberships, monthly bills, and spending money.  Three children, two families, one burning life’s question.  Do we do too much for our children?  Sit back and let us tell you She of We’s story.

Number Two Son of She was at the airport.  Just a matter of days ago he was flying west to embark on a weekend away as young ones are now so inclined to do to visit strange cities where the strange inhabitants have a curious habit of dying their river a strange green.  But that’s a tale for a different day.  This one begins and ends at the airport.  Our airport.  The departing city.

This story began several trips ago that Number Two Son of She takes with some regularity.  They are almost always by plane and almost always end up with him missing the last leg of his journey leaving whoever (three guesses) was assigned to collect him at the local airport stranded at the airport.  But it was a habit and one that that seemed would forever end with whomever (three guesses) stranded at the airport or waiting for the call that he is finally about to board a plane home and would be there sometime within the hour or two.  So it wasn’t that He of We would not have expected Son of She to be calling She of We, but not so soon.

But sooner rather than later the call did come and with it came our life’s question, do we do too much for our children. A call that began sort of innocently with a seeming innocent question.  Did She of We have Son of She’s spare car key?  No, but why?

It seemed that after years of explaining, rationalizing, cajoling, complaining, and persuading, She of We convinced Son of She to drive himself to the airport and deposit his car in one of the long term parking lots ($8.00 per day, no hourly rate).  So convinced was Son of She that he actually discovered another traveler among his friends to the very same destination for the very same duration and offered him a ride to and from the airport.  Presumably for the low price of $4.00 per day.  No hour rate.  And off for the airport they set, their sights set on the gate labeled Extended Parking.  They must have not set their sights so high as to see the overhead sign not reading Extended Parking, rather they entered the parking mecca at the gate labeled Short Term Parking ($2.50 per hour, maximum daily rate $25.00).

Yes, he finally was convinced.  Son of She, finally convinced that he could drive himself to the airport did just so, and shortly after his arrival there made the call to She of We.  It was the call from the airport relating this very tale.  But the tale was not told just for its entertainment value.  It concluded with a request for her to drive 20-some miles to the airport with his spare key so that she could move his car into one of the long term lots that she had so often spoke of. And shortly thereafter was the call from She of We to He of We with that question, do we do too much for our children?

Do we?  Daughter of He still lives at home in the very room she shared with her childhood stuffed animals.  And is still sharing.  Number One Son of She resides in a second house of hers that could be rental income but is serving much better as Son Cave as he manages his own growing contracting company.  Number Two Son of She recently purchased his own house, able to convince the mortgager that he was good for it because he is one of the gainfully employed, his gainful employment at the favor calling of She of We who realized long before he what kind of job he would otherwise land with an undergraduate political science degree.

And still they ask.  And still do we.  Do we do too much for our children?  For the record, She of We did not make that journey yet we still wonder.  And we wonder that it is a wonder that someone thought it was quite reasonable even just to ask.  And there probably is the answer.  Maybe.  Possibly. Sort of.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

Baseball, Hotdogs, Apple Pie, and “It’s a Shame.”

Michael Leave a comment

We’ve been taking a post or two as we approach the Fourth of July holiday to see what’s out there that makes us uniquely Americans – including the bad things, while trying to find the good things about us.

In our last post we took our first look at how the country is doing and remarked on the bullying of the now famous bus monitor and the remarkable response people had to her plight.  Much of that remarkable response might have been American, but since that time we found out that the instigator of the good is a Canadian.  Thank you Mr. Norther American for showing us below the 49th parallel how it is to be good.

Unfortunately there are still many bad examples.  Sometimes, not only do we have a hard time admitting that the bad are the bad, we go the extra step to assume the bad is actually an example of good behavior, just gone wrong.  One morning this week the local television news had a piece about three teenagers that were killed two years ago right after attending “an alcohol fueled graduation party.”  The parents wanted to remember them so they created a memorial with plaques, benches, and pictures overlooking the site of the accident.  Had we not done a little research it would have been just three kids who died.  Other than that one phrase quoted above, the morning news story said nothing about the car’s occupants being drunk.  And being drunk isn’t something one should be memorializing.  It’s a shame.

But research it we did and that research uncovered a longer piece that was run during the evening newscast the day before.  In that version one of the mothers told those who attended the memorial to do whatever it takes to not drive after drinking.  It also mentioned that the alcohol was provided by a parent.  As we continued to dig we uncovered another article and video of the sentencing of the woman who bought a half-keg of beer for the graduation party from two years ago (one year of house arrest, 3 years on probation).  But we didn’t uncover scores of articles addressing the core problem.  There are people out there, sometimes children, who drink to impairment and then try to pilot a speeding vehicle.  We found no organized outrage at public drunkenness or at children drinking, no support of underage drinking laws, and no response from MADD, SADD, or the District Attorney.  Perhaps nobody wanted to hurt the survivors more than they were, and still are.  It’s a shame.

A day later the same television station ran a story about the arraignment of a man who during a drunken driving rampage injured 10 people in what police described as a “bumper bowl game.”  This young man hit at least six cars, one head on, before running into a guard rail that stopped his onslaught.  His blood alcohol was three times the legal limit. 

He probably missed the story from the day before and didn’t get a chance to do whatever it took to not drive after drinking.  What a shame.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

 

Baseball, Hotdogs, Apple Pie, and “Aren’t they cute?”

Michael Leave a comment

Summer is a great time to be thinking about how the country is doing.  We’re getting close to the 240th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence and we should be checking up on how we’re doing keeping a country free and a government of, by, and for the people.  (For anybody checking, that anniversary isn’t coming up this July.  It’s still 4 years away but thinking stuff like this can take a while.)  Those few weeks between Flag Day and Independence Day are good days to look about at what’s good, what’s bad, and what’s uniquely American.

Last week we got to see the best and worst of Americans all wrapped up in one convenient incident.  Although it happened earlier, by mid-week it hit the national news.  Four middle schoolers, 11 and12 year olds, decided it was going to be not only a good day to taunt their bus monitor but to record and post it to the Internet for all the world to see.   So they hurled insult after insult, poked and pointed, swore at and about a 68 year old grandmother, former bus driver, and guardian of the good children on the bus.  It wasn’t the first time that they aimed their low sights at her, and it wasn’t the first time that she sat stoically taking it.  It was a horrible example of how miserably some American youth are raised and how much of their disgusting behavior is tolerated.

And then in an amazingly disgusting example of wretched behavior, one of the feeble four decided they should share their offensive conduct with the rest of the world and thus the recording was posted to the Web.   But instead of thousands of viewers sending them accolades for a bullying job well done, hundreds of thousands instead sent sympathy to the abused woman.  Tangible sympathy.  Five hundred thousand dollars worth of sympathy.  A half million ways to say we’re sorry for the incredibly stupid behavior of incredibly stupid children.

Perhaps it was the world’s way of providing one of those auto corrections that our planet does without our knowledge to keep us from hurling into space away from the safety of our solar orbit.  Maybe it’s the first step in the world’s recognition that not all children are cute and impulsive and they don’t mean anything by it.  Maybe somebody is finally realizing that if the parent’s aren’t going to handle their children, if the schools aren’t going to discipline the children, and if the police aren’t going to punish the children, that at least someone is going to see that the victims will be compensated for being a bully’s target.

Maybe the most disturbing part of the week’s news was that now that the children have been exposed and have even attempted too little too late apologies there are some who are upset that others are expressing their dismay at the miscreants’ behavior.  Again, in a remarkable worldly auto correction, the bullies have become the targets.  Even targets of death threats.  Don’t worry kids.  Those old people saying you should be expelled, fined, imprisoned, or maybe even executed are just so cute, but a little impulsive, and they don’t really mean it.  Maybe.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?