On being loved into being

I was working in adapting a post I wrote for my foundation site for here because, well, because I think it’s really good and would make a great lead up to Thanksgiving blog post. I thought after what we as country just went through having to experience the childishness that accompanied s years general election, that a word from someone who worked so successfully with children is just what the doctor ordered. So I ordered it.

And then Colorado Springs happened. You’ve heard of that incident. Five dead. Nineteen wounded. One nut case up with a f-ing assault rifle destroys the dreams of 24 People because he has a “right” to carry an assault weapon into a crowd and start firing. Of course you know that same day in Philadelphia, Mississippi nut case or nut cases unknown shot seven people, killing one, over a dice game.

If you’re keeping score, those are mass shootings #26 and 27 in the US for the month of November. Not the year – for November’s, which still has 10 days to go. One of them is Thanksgiving. Are you still thankful we have the “right” to carry guns at will? Maybe this will help. How are 602 mass shootings for this year.

It’s time to stop this madness.

The  post that  I was going to rework, you can read it here. And actually if I were you I would. It’s a whole lot happier and more positive than this dreck.

The theme running through that post is based in an idea voiced by Fred Rogers in his acceptance speech for the Lifetime Achievement Award, bestowed to him at the 24th Annual Daytime Emmy Awards in 1997, “All of us have special ones who loved us into being.” What a wonderful way of thinking of how we have become who we are, that there are people who have loved us into being. Gratitude is not, and should not, be an exercise is saying thanks for what we have, for in truth we will not always have. We should be expressing thanks because we are, because even when we do not have, we always will be.

Maybe the nut cases of the world didn’t have anybody to love them into being. We did. Be grateful. Be grateful you have people who have loved you into being. Say thank you to them, because without them, you are not the who you are.

Seriously, do yourself a favor, go read it. It will take you less time to read than you’ve spent reading this junk that I’ve written here.  Go find out about this idea of being loved into being. And then go out and love somebody that much.

5CC706D0-49A9-43DE-A8E2-699DC82FE8BA

Used with permission

Some things I don’t know that I don’t know why I don’t know them

You would think if I got to be as old as I got to be, I’d have figured out most of what it is that got me here. Nope. There are still way too many things I don’t know. Some of the are just beyond my grasp and I now take it for granted that I’ll never know how radios work without wires and why yellow and blue make green. But some things shouldn’t be that hard and I still can’t figure them out. For instance:

Why does only one shoelace come undone in the middle of a long walk. Both feet are going the same places and the same paces. Both shoes and both laces are made of the same materials. The temperature and humid at my left foot are pert near identical to those at my right. All things being equal, why are the laces? What makes one slip its knot and not the other?

Why does a cracker spread with peanut butter always fall face down when it slides off the plate to get away from its cracker cousins? In a similar vein, have you ever noticed when you pour a bagful of wrapped candy pieces into a candy jar, they always land with the pretty shining label face down leaving the tacky loose edged wrapper “tails” facing up and daring you to turn each one over?

Why do microwave ovens at work, hospital and garage waiting rooms, and other public venues always smell of popcorn and pizza? I once was involved in the opening of a hospital. Brand new facility.  New paint on new walls, new tile on new floors, new tables and chairs in new break rooms, and a brand new microwave right out of the box. And even that one smelled of popcorn and pizza when it was opened the first time!

Why does my email spam filter redirect newsletters to which I’ve subscribed to the junk email folder but allows ##HEARING_AID_ADVICE ‼️ and **Prostrate Help is Here**  through to the inbox unmolested?

Who is Pete and why do we keep doing things for his sake?

And the biggest puzzle of all: Why do people go to the grocery store wearing camouflage? I’m not talking about military persons completing a household chore in their way home at the end of their duty day. I mean the guy who closet brush with the army is watching The Dirty Dozen on his favorite football team’s bye week Sunday? Hey fella! Those animals in the meat case are already dead. You don’t have to sneak up on them. Hmm. You know what? On second thought, I don’t want to know the answer to this one.

 



What do you do with a day that’s cloudy and gray? Don’t wait for tomorrow; tomorrow is a long way away. Start a new day today! The sun that will come out tomorrow is already up there. All you have to do is let the light in.

This is really a good one. If you haven’t been there, go to ROAMcare.org and check out our last week’s blog “Today is Only a Day Away.”


1070981C-95F2-42EC-BAFC-F3F02FB349C2

Too odds to be true

I had intended today’s post to be of a single thought unlike the previous few that meandered through my consciousness. And then fate intervened. Fate does that you know. One thing happened and one thing will that combine might actually make me question my theory of all things are 50/50. If you’re unfamiliar with that, go read it here. We’ll wait. 

These is uniquely an American post although other readers surely will get something out of it. They may learn a lesson or two or they may get a good laugh at thee crazy ‘mericans. 

I am still a firm believer that life is an even odds proposition. Everything either will or won’t, is or isn’t, does or doesn’t. I’ve said that so often I could have made a career out of it. I’ve actually gotten close to doing that, having written various blog posts and resented either in meetings or in podcasts, my theory of everything is 50/50.  

And then the PowerBall happened.  As of Sunday afternoon, the jackpot reached $1.9 billion. Lottery watchers anticipate it will top $2 billion by tonight’s drawing. People are quite literally betting the rent that a 1 in 292,200,000 long shot will come in for them. It’s making my plan to buy a single ticket because it’s odds of winning are just as good as it’s odds of loser are. (For the record, I bought 5 chances.) 

It is easy to be carried away by the thought of winning $2 billion. That’s a number I cannot grasp. Of course, that’s the price if you take the annuity option paid out over 30 years. If you want cash, it would pay out about $600,000 before taxes, maybe a little over $380,000 after state and federal taxes. Now we’re down into territory I can fathom. Still, that’s a lot of money. I said this was an American thing. Not completely. I’m sure there are Canadians, Mexicans, Etceterians willing to cross borders for a chance at $2 billion, US.  But it’s not completely All- American. You can buy a PowerBall ticket in 45 states, the District of Columbia, Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands. That leaves 5 states and a few territories out of the picture. Let’s stick with the states. Hide that do not participate are Alabama, Alaska, Nevada and Utah and presumably residents of those states can drive across the closest state line and plunk down however many $2 offerings they desire, although it only takes one. Oh wait, you say we’re still missing a state. Hmm yes. The fifth state where the PowerBall is only a game to be played in one’s mind is our fiftieth state, Hawaii, and not even just a quick drive across the state line will be enough to get you a chance to lose two bucks.  

Now that second thing going on that defies odds is tomorrow’s elections. It’s Election Day in the US and some of the nastiest, meanest, and dirtiest, politically races should come to an end by the close of polls on Tuesday. Unfortunately, reports are that candidates are already preparing legal challenges to voters, votes, and election certifications, some saying they will not accept the decision of the voters if they are not declared the winner. I’m not kidding about that. One has gone so far as to say when he is governor of his state he can and will decertify any or all voting machines at his discretion, basically insuring his stay as governor as king as he gets over that first hurdle and makes it past the voters this week. It looks like tomorrow will be just the beginning of politician season.

Truly only in American politics can my theory of everything is 50/50, either it is or it isn’t, either it did or it didn’t, be invalid. To listen to those yahoos running, everything either is or else. Now those odds are truly too odd to be true. 

——————

Have you thought how much you could benefit by doing for others with no thought of a reward. It is the beginnings of selflessness and the foundation of character. We do these not because we want something. We do them because we don’t. Read how we find our selflessness at ROAMcare.org

Trick or Treat -ish, Part Last

Well here we are. The big day. The day that began with people wearing costumes to ward off ghosts to a day to honor the dead, to a day for kids to fill their bags with candy, to the day when adults get as drunk as on St. Patrick’s Day. So here we are with some more of my ghoulish thoughts. Innumerable. And for the last time. (Yeah, yeah. Go ahead and cheer.)

 

THOUGHT 1

Did you know the 25% of all candy sold in the US is at Halloween. Take that St. Valentine! And last year, Americans spent nearly $500 million on costumes — for their pets! Both of those facts are courtesy of History.com. If anybody should know what has happened, it would be them. (Hmm I wonder…if anybody would know what has happened, it should be them. I’m not sure which way. If anybody has an strong opinion on that, I’d love to hear about it. Anyway…) I think that’s a TREAT, or at least it’s pretty cute.

According to the American Addiction Center, Halloween is the fifth booziest American holiday. That’s plenty enough on that topic. TRICK

 

THOUGHT 2

You might have seen over the weekend news about the tragedy in South Korea – over 150 people were killed and another 130-plus injured in a crowd surge. The details of what initiated the stampede were not clear by the last time I checked the news. What was known is that it started at a Halloween party and many of the victims were in costume. I’m a country not known for celebrating Halloween. TRICK, BAD TRICK.

I’m sure you didn’t see this in the news but around here almost every community’s fire company’s held Halloween parades, costume parties, and “Truck or Treats.” SUPER FUN BIG TREAT!!

 

THOUGHT 3

There is only one week left till the American general election. I hate to start a sentence like this but…I remember when candidates had pithy little sayings (remember All the way with LBJ?), and then they’d even mention some of their qualifications or at least attributes. Now it is more a matter of how bad can you portray your opponent? Here in my neck of the woods we’ve heard candidates called extreme, dangerous, radical, a fraud, and delusional. Imagine going into a job interview and telling your prospective boss, “You should hire me. I can’t give you any good reason to, but I can tell you that other guy who was just here is delusional.” How can you even say that in an ad. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. TRICK, DISGUSTING TRICK.

Yesterday was National Candy Corn Day. Candy corn is a superfood and a perfect food. I know because I said so here.  I also said, “As far as candy goes, Candy Corn is a healthy snack. Umm, healthier snack. Each serving, officially 15 pieces or one generous handful, is fat and cholesterol free, low sodium, and contains 22 grams of sugar and only 110 calories. Unlike real corn it is also fiber free so they’ll be no uncomfortable bloating.” What more could you ask for? (What more can you ask for? I have to research conditional tenses before next week. Anyway…) Candy corn leaves a good taste in my mouth. SUPER BIG BETTER THAN PEANUT BUTTER TREAT!!!


BONUS THOUGHT

Did you know we are forever learning, growing, and evolving, and are perpetual works in progress on a permanent quest for improvement. Read why we say never resist a temporary inconvenience if it results in a permanent improvement at ROAMcare.org. (Believe me, it will be a TREAT!)


2639ADDD-9FFA-4219-BCC5-17C4F984EE5D

Trick or Treat – ish, Part 2

Yes, yes, more tricks and treats coming out of the cobweb filled corners of my brain.

THOGHT ONE
It’s fall. Autumn. That season between summer and winter when apparently it can be either summer or winter depending on Mother Nature’s mood. Last week outside my door snow accumulated for the first time this season. Last week outside my door it was 80 degrees (About 26 or 27 C). Man does that make it difficult to decided what pajamas to wear! TRICK

It’s fall. Autumn. Spring is probably more colorful based on the wide variety of hues displayed by blossoming plants and blooming flowers, but autumn leaves have to be the most dramatic display of nature’s beauty with its riot of reds and yellows and oranges. TREAT!

 

THOUGHT TWO

It’s fall. Autumn. Pumpkin spice flavor everything season. REPEAT TRICK

It’s fall. Autumn. Apple everything season. From apple butter to apple cider to apple fritters to apple soup. Last week I made a batch of apple fritters from freshly picked apples. I can’t scientific prove it, but I’m sure they tasted better than from those store bought apples you get in February. And you say you never had apple soup? There are a million recipes for it on line (okay okay, that’s an exaggeration, maybe only two or three hundred), this is the one I most often used. YUMMY, COLORFUL TREAT!!

 

THOUGHT THREE (Part A)

A throwback to my recent plan ride. Did you know they don’t have air all catalogs in the seat back pockets in planes anymore? What are we supposed to read during take off and landing when you can’t be connected to the in flight Wi-Fi? TRICK

If you’re sitting by a window it is still a thrill to see yourself being lifted from the ground and cutting through the clouds in take off and watch the land become more and more distinct like you own personal nature movie on landing. TREAT!

THOUGHT THREE (Part B)

Did you know they now have in flight Wi-Fi? Can we never get away from being plugged in? TRICK
You are still allowed to read a real book, take a real nap, or if you get a friendly seat mate, talk to a real person. TREAT!

 

THOUGHT FOUR

I’m done with thoughts for this week. Go in. You can admit it. TREAT!!

Don’t tell anybody, it’s a secret, but there will be even more next week too! TRICK!!!


Extra bonus THOUGHT

What happens when someone breaks down your front door? Surprise! When things go unexpectedly, stay calm. See it as a chance to learn and grow. A true story you have to read at ROAMcare.org.

 


C2B5C3BF-0580-407B-8079-76D82158E800

Trick or Treat – ish

Today I will present to you another edition of some things that have been floating around in my brain.

THOUGHT ONE

Last week, for the first time in 8 years I was in an airplane. People were polite, the flight was good, the flight attendants seemed happy enough considering they were actually at work. And they snacks weren’t bad. And they still had snacks. It was direct flight so I didn’t have to deal with a rush of angry travelers rushing from gauge to gate for a connecting flight. Even though it was over 5 hours, thanks to the technology of sound cancellation and in flight Wi-Fi I hardly noticed. TREAT!

Last week, for the first time in 8 years I was in an airport. The gate agents were meaner than I remembered, the chairs in the gate area were more uncomfortable than I remembered, baggage claim was slower than I remembered. TRICK.

Last week, for the first time in 8 years I had to go through airport security. The line was short, the line moved fast, every TSA agent was pleasant and one actually helpful! PEANUT BUTTER CUP TREAT!!

THOUGHT TWO

I don’t have any data to confirm it but I think football season is bringing out even more o the worst in those trending to a return of Neanderthalism. It was one of my more distressing days, physically speaking. Some days I move with great agility and grace. Most days I move like the clutz (klutz?, yeah, klutz), most days I move like the klutz I have ungracefully grown into, Occasionally I have days I can barely walk without super lot of “dear God please let me finish what I need to do and get home and cry” type pain days. This was one of those days. It was also the day I was circling the parking lot looking for somewhere, anywhere close to the store’s entrance. It was also the day every handicap spot was taken by a monster of a “look at me I’m a man and I still make testosterone” pickup truck. One in particular stood out. That was the one speeding through the lot, not stopping at crosswalks, and swerving around 3 pedestrians like there were orange cones in an obstacle course into the last handicap spot. As he hopped out of the driver’s side I heard shout to presumably somebody with very poor taste in “men” in the passenger seat, “fxxx fxxx-ing light beer. You’ll drink what I fxxx-ing buy!” The voice inside said, “Whatever, just hurry so we don’t miss kick-off again!” SUPER BAD TRICK!!!

I don’t have any data to confirm it but I think most complain, critique, and criticize without ever experiencing that which they complain about, critique, and criticize. Case in point, see above helpful TSA

Agent. I was approaching the line entrances dragging my rolling carry-on (roll-on? Hmm, no, that’s deodorant), anyway, I was dragging rolling carry-on, “personal item” slung over my shoulder, cane keeping me from listing too far starboard, err, falling over. He came over to me and asked if I wanted any help, a chair or one of their little golf cart thingies (I know it has a more official sounding name but you know what I mean), and I said no thank you, I move a little slower than I used to but I’m fine. He asked me if I had the TSA Pre-Check and when I said no, he led to a line that labeled First Class and Special Passengers. “I’m declaring you my special passenger. Have a good, safe flight.” SUPER GOOD TREAT!!!

THOUGHT THREE

It’s pumpkin pie season again! TREAT!

It’s pumpkin spice everything under the sun season again. TRICK.

THOUGHT FOUR

The reason I was in the airport on the plane was to visit a dear friend I speak to daily but haven’t seen in over 2 years. EXTRA SUPER TREAT!!!!

The best times like visiting a dear friend you have seen in so long are always over too fast. THE WORST TRICK EVER.

THOUGHT END

Have an extra super good and safe week everybody! Till next time…


THOUGHT EXTRA

How much have you missed while you were waiting for the right moment, waiting for better odds? How would you like a 50/50 chance of getting anything you want? You already do! Read how to get those odds at ROAMcare.org. (That’s a TREAT worth looking into!)


946B7CBC-F0DD-418E-9391-1C9061CB7232

Happy Holidays

Today in the USA it is Columbus Day. That’s what it says in the Federal Register. Americans being Americans can’t let anything happen without controversy so the holiday named for a man who never set foot on North American soil is called by a few other names so we aren’t honoring the man who forcibly conquered entire populations of people who were here when he never set foot on American soil. But that’s a different post for a different day. Today’s post is just to wish you a happy day because for 99.7% of us, that’s all we’re gonna get.

The United States of America has 11 federal holidays. Proposals are floating around Washington to approve 7 more. And there are a handful of days (Armed Forces Day Inauguration Day, and others) which grant federal employees days off but have not been elevate to the rank of “Holiday.” Not that it would matter. There is a law on the books that says the federal government cannot force any state to observe a federal holiday and it cannot prevent any state from declaring its own holiday(s). I guess that’s the technical difference between a federal holiday and a national holiday.

Of those 18 holidays, only 7 are actually fixed days that commemorate something that happened that day either by history or tradition. Five of the approved holidays – New Years, Juneteenth, Independence Day, Veterans Day, and Christmas) are celebrated the same day every year. Thanksgiving is always the fourth Thursday of November regardless of date (likely to make the scheduling for Black Friday easier). Two of the six holidays that float so they will always result in 3 day weekends supposedly commemorate peoples’ birthdays (Martin Luther King, Jr. and George Washington) and you’d think if we were celebrating birthdays we’d celebrate it on the birthday date, but…well. Americans. What can I say?

Those floating days are important to the narrative here so let’s keep them, and 5 of the proposed 7 federal holidays that may join their ranks, in mind. The Uniform Monday Holiday Act (yeah, that’s what it’s called) of 1968 was enacted to create more three day weekend opportunities for employees. That’s about it. Oh and that’s the act that made Columbus Day an official federal holiday, so it instituted 2 things of controversy with one law. (Originally Veterans Day was also assigned to a floating Monday but reverted to November 11 in 1978.) Those federal employees are important here now too. Let’s keep them in mind now.

So, if you are a federal employee, Happy Columbus Day. Enjoy your day off.  Everybody else. Get back to work. Congress only has the power to enact federal holidays and grant days off, premium pay, or any other perk of the law for employees of federal institutions. Everybody else. Sorry. Unless you have a really generous boss, no law gives you those days off. Nope. It’s not one of your rights either. Generally, since the 1970s most business still conduct business on almost every day of the year.

If you’re like me and have always worked in hospitals or organized health care settings, emergency services, or some entertainment fields, every day, whether weekday, Saturday , Sunday, or holiday, could be a day of work. Some banks and schools celebrate every holiday and then some and might have more than just those extra 11 days off. But for many, holidays today are not like the holidays of the past. Few people experience days off or holiday celebrations for more than for New Years, Independence Day, Thanksgiving and Christmas. Which incidentally were the first four recognized federal holidays. You know what? Maybe that just about right.

So allow me to wish you a happy day. Even if you don’t want to call it anything!

Blog Art 2 4


Why settle for a result where everyone loses? It’s better when everyone wins! Don’t compromise. Collaborate instead! Read now we do it at www.roamcare.org.

Read the book

Not too many posts ago I wrote one about the changes that a story goes through on its way from printed page to silver screen. That got something stirring in me and I set out to read or reread as many of the books that have been the inspiration to some of my favorite movies. Along the way I noticed something curious. Many modern movies hold themselves much closer to the original stories than movies from the golden age, and while I think that’s a good thing for the high school football star who has little time for such nonsense as reading, the older movies are typical of a higher quality, story telling wise and even production wise. (Yes, I know, but that’s my opinion. It’s also my blog. Get over it.)

We likely have Will H. Hays to thank for the creative license taken by screen writers in the 1940s and 50s. Although the so-called Hays Code “governed” film propriety until 1968 when the now familiar 4 tiered Motion Picture Association of America rating system was adopted, it was during the golden age of moviemaking (1936-1962) that the classic movies differed much from their classic written beginnings – but often in a good way.

Reading the book versions of some film classics revealed three major changes. Most movies were targeted to run from 105 to 115 minutes. Provocative talk was okay, action was not. The bad guy not only never wins, he always gets more than his due.  Although I the past two weeks I’ve read The Thin Man, The Maltese Falcon, The Big Sleep, and To Have and Have Not, I’m going to use Farewell, My Lovely, adapted to “Murder, My Sweet” as the film/book comparison. I’m case you want to read, watch, or do both with this story and have not yet done either, I will not reveal any plot information in this discussion.  

Raymond Chandler’s Farewell, My Lovely, released in 1944 as “Murder, My Sweet”* has enough character exposés and plot twists to fill 3 hours of screen time. Even “Gone With the Wind” couldn’t keep audience members who were honest entertained for 180 minutes. To keep it to a reasonable length, some sub-plots were completely eliminated and characters combined to make transactions flow through the deleted scenes less awkwardly. Of thirteen main characters from the novel, eight made the transition to the screen version and three of them were significantly altered.

Before we discuss plot changes it is worth noting the Chandler was not a stickler for plot details. Rather than relying on formula and a certainty that everything wraps up neatly at the end, he said he was more interested in the message conveyed by his stories. During the adaptation of another of his novels, The Big Sleep, screen writer William Faulkner, a pretty good novelist himself, was unable to reconcile one of the murders. It is said that after many hours of trying to successfully reveal, or at least hint at the culprit responsible for the character’s demise, the screenwriting team decided to call Chandler and ask who did it. His response? He didn’t know either!

In both book and movie, a missing necklace and a missing woman are central to the story. While the compactness of the plot and some subplot elements that were victims of time are obvious if you read the book before watching the movie, but if your first exposure to the tale is at the movies, there are no unresolved issues.  How the woman and necklace become missing and found, and what happened in between were victim to the censors and may leave your wondering if the suspension of disbelief might be stretched just a little. Illegal drug use, questionable social couplings, racial and economic disparities, and police corruption were tempered or cast aside. The resulting screenplay, although missing many of the stops along the way to the conclusion, does not suffer for these details. In most cases, the viewers can replace with their imaginations what was handed to them in writing. This is not always a bad thing. Often your imagination can make a better story than the one first considered and when the inferences are made deftly, the conclusions can be fairly consistent. In a different movie/book tandem, The Thin Man by Dashiell Hammett, although Nick and Nora sleep in separate beds in full pajamas with dressing robe and gown, there is no question that they are giddyingly in love with each other and present as a passionate couple.

The conclusion of “Murder, My Sweet,” although satisfying, takes a major departure from the novelist’s vision. Again, needing to satisfy the censors of the time, the character wrap up are quite different. Some “bad guys” in the novel are still walking around when the last page is turned. The Hays Code wanted audiences to see that crime not only doesn’t pay, but exacts a price. We never see the bullets fly (too violent) but we see the results. And who does the “cleaning up” and how they are manipulated so nobody gets an easy way out are somewhat vague. A final twist is the movie’s version of a happy ending, although working well for the movie, may not have been exactly as Chandler would have written it.

The is no question that if you watched “Murder, My Sweet” you know you are watching the story behind Farewell, My Lovely. It is faster paced, you might think you missed something when you went to re-butter the popcorn, and at the end you could be saying, “oh, yeah, I can see that,” but it’s clearly the same story. It’s just not the same.

Is it a bad thing that movie adaptations deviate from their source materials? Not always. When nothing but the title and a character name are all that are recognizable you get the sense the studio or production company know they have a dog of a story and the only way they stand a chance to make money is to buy a popular title. But a good story in the hands of talented screen writers, especially if they are source writers themselves, will show through regardless of constraints placed by the questionable morals police or to the keep it short so they don’t get bored police.

To quite somebody from some book or movie, “It’s all good!” (But it wouldn’t kill you to read the book.)

Blog Art 2 3


* Murder, My Sweet was not the first screen adaptation, nor the last, nor was the screen the only adapted medium of Farewell, My Lovely. Although the latest adaptation was made in 1975, it still was subject to significant changes for time and cultural references.



You affect everyone you meet, whether with words, actions, or just a smile. Read why we say you brighten everybody’s day with your presence at http://www.roamcare.org.


Move It!

A couple of days ago I was talking my regular morning walk when I passed a young man loading a U-Haul trailer. Not an unusual site in an apartment complex parking lot. People are always moving in or out. I suppose I made more of a mental note about it because it was the middle of the month and that, although still not unusual, is less usual that it would have been two weeks later. Maybe that’s why my brain went into overtime thinking of moves I’ve made over the years.

There are some people who have never moved. I know at least one family where at least one offspring has lived in the same house through what it now the fourth generation. And there others I know who have moved multiple times in a year, one particular other who moved three times in one particular year. I think I fall neatly in the middle. In my first six years of adult life I had six different addresses. In the next thirty I had one. (Actually, let’s call it one and a half as I maintained a small apartment on the opposite side of the state to lessen what would have otherwise been a killer commute. But that’s a story for a different post. I’ll make a note of it.) Since then I have moved along through two additional addresses. If you are one of the ones who have never moved, I’m not so sure I can say you’re one of the lucky ones. Moving can be an adventure and some adventures are pretty – umm, adventurous.  If you’re one of the ones who has moved and it has never involved a drive it yourself truck or pull it yourself trailer, then indeed you are one of the lucky ones!

My first couple of moves were easily handled by the back seat and trunk of my car. Granted that car was a 1976 Monte Carlo that had more interior room than some of today’s trucks have cargo volume. The trunk swallowed a console television set with room, lots of room to spare, as long as I didn’t mind barreling down the highway with the trunk lid raised. I believe it was move #3 that was the first to require a more traditional heavy hauler, in the form of a small boxy U-Haul trailer tacked onto the rear bumper of the Monte Carlo’s successor, a shiny white Thunderbird that had oodles of amenities but barely enough room in its trunk for a decent early 80s stereo. These were all simple, “get from one side of town to the other” type moves that barely registered to the neighbors that somebody was moving in or out. Not the type where a large truck with a crew of uniformed workmen ready to pack, lift, and carry any and everything put in front of them. That will be coming. But not yet.

The next move was the first that involved a truck. A big truck, smaller than a full blown moving van but bigger than a standard cargo van type truck. But no packers. No lifters or loaders. No drivers. Just a big truck. And me. And the then Mrs. And a dog. So, me. Now this trip involved a move! A cross country move. Well, a cross half country move, from Pennsylvania to central Texas. One thousand four hundred miles over three days. Me in the truck with nearly everything we owned. The then Mrs. and the dog in the brand new red T-Bird Turbo coupe with the snack bag. This was pre-cell phone days. The only way to communicate on the road was with walkie talkies or CB radios. We opted for the CB set-ups, anticipating being always in contact with each other, coordinating rest stops, food stops, and sleep stops. In reality, the only times on day one we were within range of each other were during the radio check in front of soon to be former residence and at the pre-determined first night stop, a Days Inn, 480 miles west and 150 minutes behind schedule. And so it went for the next 4 days. Yes, we modified our planned daily mileage and driving times significantly, swapping 300 miles a day for 5 days into the place of the definitely overachieving initial plan of 500 miles over 3 days.

It was a few years after then that time came to move back in the other direction, and remembering the joys of the earlier trip across half of the country, I opted for the fullest of full services available. We didn’t even have to lift a tape gun to seal any of boxes that we didn’t fill. The most strenuous thing I did for that move was sign a check. Everything was packed, loaded, and hauled 1400 miles east without any work done by yours very truly. Everything. Including the bag of garbage sitting beside the garage door waiting to be carried to curb upon our departure.

The moves since then were of a hybrid nature. I packed and unpacked and the stuff in the middle was handled by a small crew of professionals and real moving vans. Not as many good stories came from those moves, no stories at all I think. That was okay with me. I had plenty to talk about from other more eventful moves, even if there were half a lifetime ago.

Blog Art 2 2



Making different choices than someone else doesn’t make you wrong. It makes you you. Read why we say you should live the life you want in our latest blog at ROAMcare.org



Two Rights Make a Wrong

Quite some time ago, actually nearly 4 years ago I wrote of the madman who gunned down 13 worshippers in a Pittsburgh synagogue. I don’t recall how many rounds he fired from his assault weapon that he had the right to bear but it was enough that eleven of the thirteen were perforated sufficiently to die quite dead before help arrived. He who did the shooting has yet to come to trial. Those that know are saying a trial might begin in the spring of 2023. He has been exercising his rights to challenging this or that or asking for certain reviews and considerations. At the time there was much support for the victims and their families and much publicity of the public support for the victims. No different than at any of the mass shootings periodically experience. We say we hate hate and we hate haters, then a week later the local football team wins or loses and something takes over the headlines and we forgot what we were supposed to hate. Among the talk of hating haters, very little talk of love is mentioned. It was when I published that post was that I added this picture to my blog’s footer. (I don’t know how many scroll down that far to see it and if you read this in your email or your WordPress reader, you’d never even know it was there.)  

cropped-ltn1.png

But this post isn’t about the insanity of mass killings, the insanity of the right to bear arms, the insanity of the legal system. It’s not even about the sanity of what loving your neighbor might do to combat the insanity of hating everybody instead. No, this post is about the insanity of the average Joe (or Jo) of expecting our “rights” to be always right.

Following the death of Queen Elizabeth II, a particular Tweet was published expressing the Tweeter’s remorse at not knowing the Queen was ill or the Tweeter would have wished her a long, painful, and tortuous road to death. It seemed cruel that someone would say so, but right or not, it is her right to say as she wishes. It also seemed inflammatory so the monitors at Twitter removed it. Within a few hours, hundreds or Tweets were published, and petitions filed supporting the Tweet and the Tweeter and condemning Twitter for removing the message. But here again, right or not, it was Twitter’s right. (Before anybody jumps on the “what about free speech” bandwagon, know that all those rights in the Bill of same are guaranteed from meddling by the government. Private parties, whether individual or corporate all have the same rights.)

This week is Banned Books Week in the USA. Each year the American Library Association celebrates the right to free expression and and directs attention to that right by challenging the parents and politicians who challenge certain publications as having no moral value and as such should be removed from libraries, schools, or anywhere children might be exposed to questionable content. A “top ten” list of of the most challenged pieces is compiled each year and published on their website. What is interesting is that many of the books are non-fiction. I’m not certain how somebody challenges the propriety of something that just is, but that is their right to question and ask for something to be taken out of the schools, just as it is the right of those who develop syllabi to use their education and experience to prepare their lesson plans and those charged with maintaining libraries to select writings from all diverse sources.

In 7 weeks, Americans will march to the polls to cast their votes for 36 governors, 33 senators, and all of the members of the House of Representatives, along with a variety of state, county, and local offices. It’s hard to tell opponents from their ads. Regardless of party, the advertising party is for the “hardworking people” and the opposition is “too radical,” “too extreme,’ or both. How is it that both sides can be right. They can’t, but the both have the right to say what they will, and others have the right to challenge them.

Rights are funny things. Somewhere along the way, in the effort to satisfy everybody, what is right seems to have gotten lost in defending the Bill of Rights. Or maybe the capitalization should be the other way. Maybe what is Right is more important that what rights are guaranteed. Can’t decide which right is right? Take a look at the bottom of my posts. Maybe the answer is there.



Our differences make us great; appreciating the differences makes us awesome! Read how we relish in what brings us joy and find your happy place cuz at ROAMcare.org.