Category Society

The old man and the see if we can get him to pick up a fake hooker

Michael Leave a comment

“An 86-year-old widower on his way to pick up a headstone for his late wife’s grave was cited today for soliciting a prostitute.  Dayton police had a decoy out today in an ongoing effort to get johns off the streets, according to officials.  The man told police he was lonely, and that’s why he was looking for a prostitute. He was cited, but not arrested because police said they were worried about his age and the man’s depression.”  [whiotv.com-12:49 p.m. Thursday, May 2, 2013]

We would tell you more but that was all there was of the story.  There should be more!  It begs for more.

  • What kind of decoy does one use to entice an 86 year old to attempt to pick up the lady and presumably offer money for sex?
  • How long has the wife been gone?  Was this a newly needed headstone or one he had to save over many years to purchase?
  • Why was the man depressed?  Was he depressed because he was caught?  Because he misses his late wife?  Because when he found out just how much a happy ending cost nowadays, he realized he’d hadn’t yet saved enough for the headstone?
  • How did the decoy and her handler decide to target an 86 year old?  Was it close to the end of the shift and they hadn’t scored as well as they planned and said “screw it, he’s still a man; go shake your wahoo at his winkie and see what comes of it?”

Last year we proposed that by the time a he or she gets to be in his or her eighties that he or she is due whatever is gettable in exchange for a lifetime of putting up with the world. (See “Entitlement Programs,” March 29, 2012).  If an 86 year old wants to pick up a hooker his only concern should be that of his missus, dead or alive.  He shouldn’t have to worry that it’s a hooker cop.

It took some digging but we eventually found out that the man had only recently lost his wife of 55 years and his daughter as well.  When the decoy approached him he offered her a few dollars to sit and talk with him.  Apparently talk was all he has left since the cancer that he suffers doesn’t allow for sexual activity.

We said back then that today’s eighty-somethings have done it all with more class than their elders did because they had to, and with more class than their youngers will because they can.   You just can’t find a no-class 86 year old.  Why did someone in a position of authority have to try to out-class a lonely old man.  Maybe those police should have followed the example of Andy Taylor of Mayberry and makes themselves available to serve however is needed.

The real Andy Griffith said, “I firmly believe that in every situation, no matter how difficult, God extends grace greater than the hardship.”  Sometimes it takes someone down here to be the vessel of that grace.  Maybe that’s why some of the better ones get to hang around for 80-plus years.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

Welcome to 2013. Now Go Away

Michael Leave a comment

Just because we don’t make resolutions until Spring is upon us (See Resolving to Keep it Real, Dec. 31, 2012) doesn’t mean we can’t be urged into encouraging others to change their behavior post haste.  We’ve gotten to experience some horrible behavior that could fill an entire year in only the first week.  And that behavior must stop.

We encountered the one that put us over the edge while we were coming out of the store and walking to our car, some 150 feet from the entrance.  As we approached it, the anything but a gentleman sitting in the car parked next to ours, started beeping his horn.  And then again.  Longer.  And then we saw why.  His certainly long-suffering wife was behind us trudging through the cold and the slush with their packages.  Apparently he felt it more prudent that he stay in the warm car while she goes into the store and buys his wares.  He also felt it more prudent that he sit in the warm car rather than picking her up at the entrance.  He knew she was done with their shopping.  He was honking the horn at her.  There was the extent of his chivalry.  He honked the horn so she didn’t have to wander throughout the lot looking for him.  Then to top things off, he let that car continue to sit in the parking space.  The one that had a snow bank just outside the passenger door.  When She of We said a bit too out loud, “He won’t even back out for her so she doesn’t have to climb through the snow,” the long-suffering wife said, “It’s ok. I’m used to it.”  She shouldn’t have to ever become used to such rude behavior.  So for 2013 he should resolve to figure out how to get along without her because eventually she’ll realize that also.

Other behavior we’d like to see not continued in 2013 is the media fascination with having to title all the news.  No longer are they happy reporting it.  Now they have to make up catch phrases to go along with it.  So please, take your fiscal cliff and go jump off of it.  Otherwise let’s at least have a little fun with it.  Since we’ve either avoided it or fallen off of it depending on what analyst is babbling, it should no longer be part of the evening news’ scripts.  But just in case it should sneak back into common parlance we propose the Fiscal Cliff Drinking Game.  Every time you hear that phrase you must drink a shot then call your congressman. 

Speaking of, and to, Congress, we’d like to see you go away.  You’re not doing anybody any good.  Make you’re next point of business for this session abandonment.  If you don’t have the decency to put yourself out of work, have the decency not to lie to the American people about the work you’re doing.  The “heroic” first vote to avoid the “fiscal cliff” saved the American worker about 20 cents for every $1,000 he or she makes in salary in what was supposed to be the temporary income tax increase.  It did not address the $2 per $1,000 increase in social security and other federal taxes and fees that will be withheld per month in 2013.  That means about $50 less per paycheck if your one of the average Americans getting paid every other week and if all those paychecks up add to $50,000 by the end of the year.

Finally for the fine men, women, and undecided in Washington please do not use 2013 to tell us how many jobs you’ve created.  Unless you also own a company that employs legal American workers you can’t create any.  Leave creating jobs to the business that actually hire, and pay, employees.  Intern and housekeeper positions don’t count.

Something else we’d like to see go away are all those special parking spaces around stores and restaurants.  We love our elder friends and neighbors.  We’ve often said that anybody over 80 can do whatever they feel like.  By then, they’ve earned it.  (See Entitlement Program, March 29, 2012.)  We’d like to see some of those parking spaces reserved for “Mothers to be and mothers of young children,” and for those picking up dinner to go, and even for those with Handicapped placards, turned into spaces for our Older Friends and Neighbors.  The eighty-somethings who are still driving do it well, and they aren’t the ones cajoling their doctors into signing HP applications for their high blood pressure.  Why should they have to walk 300 feet from the lot to the lobby?   Let’s face it, if you’re just running in for dinner, you can afford to run from a few yards away, or bring one of the kids to run inside while you circle the block.  So you’re a mother of young children.  Being parents of former young children from the days when there were no such preferred spots we can tell you our best shopping trips were those with the kids left at home.  Leave them at home.

Now that we are well into the 21st century, a time of unprecedented public protection against ourselves, we want to see the sale of sleds that cannot be steered or stopped stopped.  You can’t by an extra-large, sugary soft drink in New York City but you can put four 7-year-olds on a plastic sleeve, push them down a hill, and wish them luck knowing at the bottom is a 4 lane roadway separated from the top by a dozen 45 year old oak trees.  You can’t buy a lighter that takes at least three steps to ignite to start your grill for the safety of a child who may not understand that it isn’t a candy stick but you can buy an oversized Frisbee that sets the same child spinning uncontrollably on its downhill voyage over the same tree lined hillside.  We love winter sports.  Sledding, skiing, and skating make January and February bearable.  But let’s do it safely.  Nobody would ever put children on bicycles without brakes or a wheel that steers in April.  Let’s say goodbye to the winter version and stop making children headlines on the evening news.

Do we seem a little cranky today?  We’re sorry.  Usually we are quite upbeat and make the most of what we have.   Sometimes you have to take away to have better.  These are some things we like to see taken away.  Do you have others?  Would you like to see Black Friday not start on Thursday?  Is it time to make the baggage, premium seating, and boarding priority fees go away even if it does mean airfares go up?  Can we stop with gas prices that end in tenths of a cent per gallon?  Let us know.  We can be cranky together.  And then, that can go away too.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

 

It’s Not the End of the World

Michael Leave a comment

If you lived to see Christmas then you know the world did not come to an end on December 20.  Or even December 21.  Probably there are just as many now a week later who are saying they never did believe in that stuff as there were a week ago who were convinced that this was the month to skip the mortgage payment.  As much as we would have loved to skip a payment or two, we were pretty much certain that the time to say we’ll never see another day wasn’t going to be determined by when the Mayans ran out of rock to carve their time in stone.

But it did get us to thinking.  Were there things this year that we’ll never see again.  We’ll not see another repeating date like we did on 12/12/12.  The next one will be 01/01/01 and January of 2101 is pretty far off.  But we could still be around for 2/2/22 or even 3/3/33.  Purists will say that those are not true repeating dates but since we’re talking life or death here, 2/2/22 is pretty close.

We saw lots of celebrities go in 2012.  Dick Clark, Andy Williams, Andy Griffith.  Whitney Houston, Donna Summer.  Etta James. Dave Brubeck.  Big names.  And many other big names.  And there could be a voice we’ll never hear again or a presence on the stage we’ll never see again.  But others will come.  Others will make us laugh and sing and snap our fingers and hum along.

There will never be another Twinkie or another Pontiac GTO, two brands that disappeared in 2012.  But somebody will eventually buy the Twinkie name and start baking vanilla sponge cakes with creamy centers and somebody will tell you that the last GTO wasn’t the same as the mid-60’s muscle car that made those three letters the monogram every teenage boy wanted in his garage anyway.

Some stuff we’ve missed but we know will be back.  Hockey hasn’t made a permanent exit even though some of the people whose livelihoods have been imperiled may feel it has.  No, not the players or the owners.  Especially not the league office or the players’ union.  We mean the ticket takers, ushers, vendors, and parking attendants.  Those who rely on 41 home games – plus playoffs – for a good chunk of their annual income.

And some stuff we really hope will stay away.  Do we have to hear one more time about “the biggest sale of the season!” Does every story have to be “Breaking news!”  Does every game have to have the “Play of the century!” in it?  And for good, bad, or otherwise, once January comes can we please retire “Fiscal Cliff” or at the very least make the Washington geniuses jump off of it?

All in all we have to say that 2012 wasn’t a banner year for things going away.  We should all get together and say, “Come on 2013, let’s see what you got but don’t expect us to just roll over and play dead.”  After all, it’s not the end of the world.   

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

 

A Real Reality Check

Michael Leave a comment

We present to you our favorite least favorite happenings from the past week.  Call it a rant review.

Bathrooms.  Everybody has a favorite bathroom story.  We have a favorite bathroom question.  She of We asks why Ladies ’ Rooms always are so filthy.  Amid the toilet paper on the floor, the water on the sink, the garbage around but not quite in the trash, can you actually say any real ladies are stopping by?  Is it because of the amount of time women spend in the room that they give up on niceties?  Perhaps because women line everything with toilet paper so their bodies don’t actually touch anything in the room that when the paper slips off the seat or the handle or the sink they aren’t going to be the ones to pick it up.  Naturally that led to the follow up question: if they aren’t going to touch anything while out why don’t they wait to get home?

Airlines:  You have to be very lucky and want to travel between just the right two cities in America to get a direct flight to Anywhere, USA.  Otherwise, it’s “connecting through” on your itinerary.  Our question:  When does a layover become a rant?  He of We was connecting through Houston last week.  That’s just about halfway between east and west and that’s where United decided to have him switch planes.  When he arrived at the halfway point he discovered that his connection was going to be 3 hours and 10 minutes late in taking off.   Apparently United ran out of planes and was sticking by the initial plan to fly the plane that was due to arrive at 5pm even though it didn’t leave its departure city (4 hours away) until after 4pm.  The delay was 10 minutes less than the expected flight time to He of We’s final destination putting him there not slightly before 9pm but slightly after midnight.  Add three hours due to time zone changes and it was really a long day.  United was good enough to recognize the inconvenience they caused and offered everyone waiting at the gate for those 3 hours free soft drinks.  The women probably made a mess of the Ladies’ Room.

Stupid questions:  A variety of stupid questions were asked of us last week.  
     “Are these all the same?”  Clerk at the everything store when ringing up 20 CDs.  (Why we were buying 20 CDs will be coming up in a future post but no, there were indeed all different.)  
     Will you be wanting any dessert?”  Waitress AFTER she placed our check on the table.
     “Is that in the morning?”  Wake-up call operator responding to He of We’s request for a call at 6am.”

Reservations:  On the aforementioned trip that He of We got to wait for 3 hours to finish, he did eventually arrive at his destination and the hotel there.  Our question is why do we bother?  His reservation was for 4 nights in an up-graded, non-smoking room.  Upon check-in the clerk told him he could have 2 nights in such a room.  After that the room he was going to be put in would be unavailable and they would move him to a different, but similar room.  He of We asked the obvious question, was there anywhere in the hotel he could stay for all 4 nights without having to move.  Of course, he could have 4 nights in a standard room.  There’s a follow-up question in there somewhere but we can’t figure out exactly what it is.   

So those were our questions of the week.  Or maybe, those were our questions of the weak. 

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Strike Three

Michael Leave a comment

Twinkie, Twinkie, little cake
No longer now will you bake.
The salaries were much too high.
The union said pay up or die.
Twinkie, Twinkie, little cake
How much did they think they’d make.

Unfortunately there are over 18,000 workers with nowhere to go on the next regularly scheduled business day and who knows how many investors (you remember investors, they are the ones who actually put up the money) have no next regularly scheduled business.

Nobody wins win you have to strike for money.  You can strike to prevent workers from entering dangerous conditions.  Back when mine workers had to send in birds then wait to see if they died from methane gas exposure there were dangerous conditions one should strike against.  Back when seamstresses were locked in textile mills and not permitted to leave until an arbitrary but always high number of garments were finished regardless of a workers physical condition there were dangerous conditions.  When delivery personnel had to handle unbroken horses pulling unarmored wagons across often violent territory, there were dangerous conditions.

Because a worker wants more money is not a reason to strike.  Everybody wants more money.  Even the President of the United States wants more money but he doesn’t go on strike, he gets another job.  For him it was part time author while he wasn’t busy dong presidential things.  If the bakers at Hostess wanted more money, they could have worked harder.  Instead, they were sold a bill of goods by a union (whose officers and employees still have jobs to go to) that if they paid their union dues the union would get them more money.  We don’t recall ever seeing a news article that a union has offered to reduce their dues for workers who have been asked to work for less than what the union demands.  

As a matter of economics, and recognizing that owners are just as greedy as workers, those who lose the most during union negotiations are, well, everybody.  Take this example.  Let’s say that it takes $100 to build a chair. The chair company has 10 workers and each builds 10 chairs a year.  The workers each get $50 a chair and the company spends $5,000 on salaries.  They also pay $3,000 on health insurance.  Electricity costs $1,000 and the wood, glue, and nails cost $1,000.  That’s $10,000 for that company to build those chairs this year.  The owner who puts up all the money sells each chair for $125.   And he makes $2,500 a year if he sells all 100 chairs.  In year 2, the chair makers go to the owner and ask for 10% more this year raising their salary from $50 per chair to $55 or $550 per worker or $5,500 in total salaries.  The owner asks how many more chairs the workers will make.  No more chairs, just the same 10.  So at the end of the year 2, if the owner sells all 100 chairs he will lose $500 from his previous salary.  Instead of risking that, he’s going to raise his chair prices to $130 to make up the $500 difference.  Across the street at the table factory the workers are demanding more money this year.  Why?  Because the cost of living is going up.  Have you seen how much chairs cost nowadays?

It’s a very simple example but it’s the core problem with unions.  Every time someone gets more, somebody else needs more just to keep up.  All for money.

Someday somebody will buy the trademark and rights to the Twinkie name and the world will be happy again.  Except for those workers who will now want more money because the price of milk just went up.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

(For more of our thoughts on unions, See Union Made, June 18, 2012 in Humor.  Yep, in Humor.)

 

 

Forgotten West Virginia

Michael Leave a comment

The post Hurricane Sandy news yesterday was that power would finally be restored to most of those in New York and New Jersey who had been without electricity for two weeks.  Nobody said anything about West Virginia.

At the height of the storm, whatever weather you were facing, wherever you were, was the most important news of the time.  As your weather crisis passed, whether it was weather, weather related, or just interesting, you turned your attention to the New Jersey New York Sandy Aftermath or whatever clever title your favorite news outlet wanted to give to the disaster.  The country was riveted to their televisions watching how New York City was recovering from the storm. Except some in West Virginia.

With all the sympathy and support, assistance and aid due the residents of New York and New Jersey, please don’t forget the already forgotten in West Virginia.  Thousands there are still without power, phone, water, and roads.  In West Virginia the storm story wasn’t water, it was snow.  Snow measured in feet was dumped on the Northeast counties of West Virginia in the mountains near the Pennsylvania border.  As the snow fell so did trees and electric poles and with them power. 

There the power wasn’t just for heating and cooling and refrigeration and lights.  There many of the houses’ water supplies are from wells and power is needed to run the pumps to bring water to the house for drinking, bathing, washing, and flushing.

As the snow and the trees and the poles fell on West Virginia, a lot of that fell on the roads.  Many are still impassable which is why many are still without and will continue to be without electricity, school, work, and trips to the store.   Local officials project it will take up to six months to clear the roads, the roads they were attempting to clear from a previous wind storm before Sandy hit.

Wherever disasters hit, decency follows.  Many of the residents were able to help themselves and their neighbors clearing roads with their own tractors and being able to get to those who needed the most help.  When those with the power (political, not electric) couldn’t get to those who needed to get to someplace warm, or to get to medical aid, or to get to their prescription refills, the neighbors did.  When electricity or natural gas wasn’t available with which to cook and heat, neighbors delivered propane tanks and stoves to those who then could and did.  

That some can dig their way out to help others is a remarkable story someone should tell.  If someone can get there.  While Homeland Security officials toured the devastated areas in New York and New Jersey, they attended a briefing in West Virginia’s capital a couple hundred miles away. 

Don’t take away from the efforts to restore normalcy to the coast.  And don’t forget to give to the efforts to do the same in the mountains.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Things We Learned On Election Day

Michael Leave a comment

The election is over.  According to the news coverage of this year’s Presidential election, we learned that candidates through social media were able to go directly to the voters and skip the traditional news outlet thus creating excitement in getting out and voting in numbers we’ve not seen before.  Worldwide there was more interest in our election by some people than in the elections in their own countries.  It came after a campaign that stretched over 17 months and $8 billion.  Anything that big must have some lasting lessons learned.  Here are ours.

When Election Day falls on the first really cold day of the year, people get to break out their winterwear for the first time.  This means that many of them will end up wearing lift tickets from last ski season on their jackets like either a) a medal attesting to their prowess on the beginners’ slope, b) visible proof that they are of the means to take ski vacations even if it was 8 months ago, or c) equally visible proof that they don’t have a mirror handy to the front door.

There will be at least one person within 15 feet of you who is at the wrong precinct and will do his darnedest to try convincing the judge of elections to let him vote where he already is.

Even though at the primaries people were very obvious about who they were supporting for a variety of offices by wearing buttons, carrying signs, or having their favorite candidate’s name carved into their hairstyle, when the general election rolls around it is very obvious that nobody wants to admit who they are supporting by the complete lack or signs, cards, signs, placards and buttons, or the unexplained presence of hair extensions.

Somebody is going to have a hat that will make others want to laugh out loud.  Somebody else will be wearing gloves that don’t match.

Speaking of signs, campaign signs on public roadsides, intersections, and highway exit ramps will remain there forever next to the Humphrey/Muskie signs behind the guide rail.

People who want their first graders to experience democracy in action should do it after school because doing it before on an election day that is supposed to bring out 115% of registered voters will cause the child to steam and scream when he and/or she figures out that school started 10 minutes ago.

Newscasters really do believe states are either red or blue.

If you’re standing in a line outside a polling place there will be somebody behind you who wants to talk to somebody in front of you and the somebody in front of you will always invite the somebody behind you to come up and join him but never the other way around.

It doesn’t matter who won, who lost, or who got a write-in vote, but it matters very much that the campaigns are over and we can now go back to watching television ads for the magic ear wax vacuum.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

 

Wordsmithing

Michael Leave a comment

On the eve of the Presidential election, as Americans ponder the future of the country, while candidates’ supporters prepare to campaign right at the voting places, and as poll workers prepare voting machines, we were wondering, can people be victimized by a hurricane?

It started during a television news program that detailed the current conditions of the victims of Hurricane Sandy.  Isn’t a victim more one who is the receiver of a planned, illicit or improper action?  People are victims of crime.  People are victims of corrupt investment schemes.  Natural disasters might grow from specific conditions but they aren’t planned.  They may be dangerous but they aren’t corrupt.  They are inopportune but aren’t improper.  We got to thinking that the “victims” of Hurricane Sandy aren’t victims but are casualties.  The media may want to use victim to personify the physical, mental, emotional, and financial injuries of those whose paths were crossed by the storm.  The injuries are personal.  Making the cause of them so doesn’t make them more or less severe.  Calling those whose lives have been disrupted by Sandy victims minimizes what they truly are, casualties. 

On the eve of the Presidential election, She of We starts a new job.  She had been at her old one for over a decade and was a key player for her now former employer.  She often received offers from others and one finally came that was harder to refuse than not.  The stages of employee loss are not unlike the stages of grief.  You disbelieve, you question, you bargain, you express anger, you accept.  Her boss went straight to angry and hung out there, giving up anger only when he exhibited selfishness.  “You’re disrupting my life,” he told her upon hearing the news.  Having your house underwater, on fire, in small pieces after an explosion, or just not there is a disruption of life.

On the eve of the Presidential election, instead of sportscasters pondering whether the ultimate winner of the New York City Marathon could have been caught in the last quarter mile they are instead reduced to discussing football games that were and hockey games that weren’t.  That’s because after days of interminable announcements about how good it would be for the city to hold the marathon as scheduled, somebody spoke sense to the mayor to give up the selfish view that nothing is going to stop the famed run and declare it inappropriate to hold while others in New York City have no home to go to after running their own personal marathons.

On the eve of the Presidential election, people are still calling into talk shows and posting comments on line in response to Conan O’Brien’s remarks that “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown,” is too mean for today’s children.  Today’s children can’t handle the cruel reality of life that while some children will grow up to be famous television personalities, some will get rocks in their treat bags of life.  It’s inappropriate that Lucy is allowed to say the things she says to Charlie Brown but it’s not too mean for television news to show over a hundred houses burn to the ground where children once lived.  The cruel reality is that television networks see the potential for huge ratings and awards of excellence for their stark presentation of a natural disaster.

On the eve of the Presidential election, millions of dollars are still being spent on television, radio, electronic, print, and direct mail advertising.  Candidates selfishly tell us lies about their opponents and themselves while being inappropriately excluded from the prohibition against automated phone sales.  It’s mean that they would rather continue to spend the money on telling us how much we will be victimized by their opponents instead of spending it on reducing the real suffering from the cruelty of life that Sandy wrought.  Just think each time you see or hear a political ad today about how much good could have been done had that money been donated to the millions whose lives have been disrupted. 

We don’t want to be mean about it.  We’re just saying is that what you really meant to say?

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

 

Joe for President

Michael Leave a comment

We were talking the morning after the most recent Presidential Debate and came up with this question.  What would it be like if somebody ran for President who really wanted the job for the sake of the job.  Just a regular folk who decided to run for office.  No party affiliation, no special interest backing, no family legacy, no cultural impetus.  Just somebody who wants to be President.

You’d have to go back to the Washington/Adams election of 1788 to find someone who had to be talked into running for the office.  You certainly have to go back that far to find an election not controlled by political parties.  And then it was only one of the candidates, one G. Washington, who did not declare allegiance with a party.  That would be one out of 12 candidates.  All eleven others were affiliated with a political party.    

Back to our question though, what would it be like if the people who were running for President were just regular folks who decided to run for office?  Even back in 1788 you could hardly have called any of the candidates “just regular folk.”  Of the twelve there were 3 governors, 2 former governors, the U. S. Secretary of War, the U. S. Secretary of Foreign Affairs, the former Minister to Great Britain (Adams) and the former Commander in Chief of the Continental Army (Washington). 

Perhaps our backyards will give us a taste of what it would be like.  Although the United States is home to some of the largest cities in the world, there are many, many much smaller municipalities, all with municipal governments.  Some of the smallest might have only a single elected official, a mayor or an executive.  Some of the larger but still small communities have 3, 5, or 9 member boards of supervisors or commissioners.  Most of these officials serve for 4 or 6 year terms and if paid at all might consider their pay handsome if it makes it into three digits.  That’s for the entire year.  They decided to run because a road was bad, a sewer didn’t exist, a street light was ill-placed, or a developer was going to chop down a tree.  Their plights were real, their concerns legitimate, their opposition often fierce, and their recognition often absent.  But week after week, after working their 40 hours at a full time job they spend another 12 or 20 hours balancing the decision to buy the new police car against bargaining the new municipal tax service contract.  They have to appoint neighbors to the planning commission while explaining to other neighbors that they appointed someone else.  They spend hours deciphering the language to the ordinance restricting on-street parking during the winter so the snow plow can get through sufficient to explain it in 5 words or less on a too small and still too expensive sign.  They are just regular folks.  Working an irregular job. 

Perhaps if these men and women would ever want to run for President we might be able to elect a Chief Executive who understands taxes both from paying and spending.  Perhaps we can send someone to Washington whose new salary would mean a pay raise.  Instead these fine people want to stay local and help local issues.  The regular folks want to stay home.  With the folks.  Instead we get the people whose idea of an entry level political job is a term or two in the Senate or having been appointed Secretary of Something Useless by the President from two terms ago.

In 1788 George Washington agreed to run for President but would declare no party affiliation.  In fact, he hoped there would not be the formation of, or influence by political parties because it would lead to another thing to divide the people.  He took an office that came with the very large for the eighteenth century salary of $25,000.  Washington was already a very rich man and was going to refuse the salary.  He was convinced by members of Congress to take his pay so there would not be a precedent set that only the rich could become President.  It’s a shame that neither his hope that there would not be battling political parties nor that those other than the very rich could become President ever came true.

If just regular folks were to become President maybe we’d have a Leader who understands the difference between surplus food sent to countries who support violence against Americans and surplus food sent to schools for breakfast and lunch so the schools can still afford gym and music classes.  Maybe they would understand that you can’t appoint your brother in law the Secretary of Everything Outdoors when somebody else really understands that preservation, conservation, and recreation are more than words that rhyme.  Maybe we would have a President who isn’t afraid to tell the people when we’re in some pretty big financial trouble and all of us have to tighten our belts and include people whose work address ends in Washington, DC among the belt tighteners.

If just regular folks were to become President maybe we’d have a leader who knows you can’t be loyal to the people who voted for you and still answer to the party who picked you to be voted for.  If just regular folks were to become President we’d not have to legislate term limits.  They would be satisfied with the job they did after one or two rounds and would know it’s time to go back home with the other folks and get back to being just regular.

Maybe we did have a Just Regular Folk become President.  It was a while ago but the more we read about George Washington the more we’d like to have dinner with him.  And isn’t that the best judge of who’s just a regular Joe?  We mean George.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?

 

 

Outscored, Not Outclassed

Michael Leave a comment

This week is high school football week number 7 in our part of the world.  Yes, we know.  If you check your calendar that means they started playing football before they started classes.  It’s ok.  Here, high school football (which should be capitalized but we have to draw the line somewhere) is a cross between a religion (please don’t tell the atheists) and life’s greatest lesson learned (please don’t tell the religious).  We suspect “here” is a lot of places across the country.  It’s a strange, strange thing.

We have nothing against organized competitions for high school and younger children.  As long as one can tear oneself away from that crazy notion of “everyone’s a winner” that we try to foist on the youngest ones, any kind of competition is healthy and a necessary part of growing up.  Here they not only tear away the football players from the idea that “everyone’s a winner,” they rip it apart, crush it, stomp on it, burn it, then bury the remains.

Last Friday night we were watching the 11:00 news.  She of We watches so she can be attuned to the happenings of the world.  He of We watches so he can read the football scores across the bottom scroll.  “There’s another, 41-9!  That’s the third 41 to something in single digits this week!  Woah, look at that, 50 to 2!  I bet the coach is going to have something to say about allowing a safety!  17-14? What kind of score is that?  That’s better?  Did you see that one?  64-12!”

Maybe that sounded a little more exuberant than it actually plays out.  What amazes us about scores like that is not that there are so many of them but that there are any of them.  School sports is a place to teach the children about competition and that indeed the world is a place where everyone is not a winner.  But what happened to sportsmanship?  What happened to “win with class, lose with grace?”  For the winning team it’s just another version of “everyone’s a winner” only this version is “you’re always the winner.”  It has the same end results.  We’re creating a world where these young children when they become young adults are unprepared for conflict, discipline, and getting things right because they never had to. (See Your Turn to Keep Score, Jan. 16, 2012.)

In a sound bite world He of We heard the ultimate sound bite about all of this.  In that same news cast with the scroll filled with winning scores in the 40’s and 50’s and the losing scores in single digits was one of 14-3.  The two teams are “perennial powerhouses,” one a twice in a row district champion and on a 23 game winning streak, the other the runner-up for those two years.  The winning coach was interviewed and asked what it was like after five weeks to finally have to make a decision in the fourth quarter? (Arrogance alert #1)  He responded that he knew it would come back to him “when they got to play a good team.” (Arrogance alert #2) 

We hope the players in the five teams previously beat by that “perennial powerhouse” go on to learn that not always being a winner doesn’t always make you a loser.

Now, that’s what we think.  Really.  How ‘bout you?