Category Life

Calling All Comments

Michael Leave a comment
 
I swear I’m being singled out for some punishment for an infraction I am unaware of. Either that or I (more likely) have done something to my WordPress account without realizing it. You probably wouldn’t have noticed because I’m not a terribly often commentor although when I do I tend to be a verbose commentor, but now I’ve become a non-commentor. Actually I was made a non-commentor but I don’t know who did the making although something tells me it could have been me.
 
I think this might have started around Christmas. I commented on somebody’s post and I would typically get some reaction but I didn’t. I’m sure I didn’t think much about that because it was the holidays and everybody’s life gets a little busier then. It was probably a couple weeks after that I did again and again I didn’t and then I thought “hmmm.” Then yet again and again not and then for sure I thought “well isn’t that the darnedest thing.” 
 
So I explored and discovered the comment I thought with which I commented wasn’t there. And it wasn’t here either. I reentered it carefully making certain to not inadvertently use any forbidden language, the hit the proper keys, then hit the proper keys properly, and then again. . . not there.
 
I was recieving comments. I could respond to comments I received. But I couldn’t and as of yesterday still can’t leave comments. I can live with that as long as you can but it is curious.
 
Now this all has more than just something to do with my inability to express my sentiments over your writing within the WordPress World. (Of course it does.) I was thinking how nice it would be if 99% of the people who comment to news articles in the various interwebs would also have their comments disappear into the miasma. 
 
QuillYou know I prefer printed newspapers over their electronic counterparts but many printed papers aren’t printing either because of limited advertising revenue or limited staffing during the pandemic or just because they don’t want to any more. The thing with the old fashioned printed papers, if you wanted to expand or expound, to clarify or question, or to take umbrage or offense with an article or editorial (back when they were different), you had to pull out the pen and paper or typewriter (Google it) or the word processor and printer, formulate your thoughts, convert your thoughts to writing, consider what you wrote, decide it was worth the price of postage, then put it in an envelope and mail it. Thus a letter to the editor. Typically a well thought, well worded, intelligent letter to the editor.
 
Today, any idiot with a phone, and today every idiot has a phone, can spout out whatever drivel it feels like spouting and “comment” on articles long before it starts thinking. Then some other jackass starts commenting on the comments and then were off to the races. It used to be a source of amusement reading the churlish ramblings of people who clearly failed blocks in kindergarten and hadn’t progressed much since, trying to make what I’m sure they feel are intelligent arguments. Or at least arguments. Today it’s just mean name calling and demonstrations of hatred. 
 
I wish news outlets would do away with the comment option but then some new idiot would say that’s infringing on the freedom of speech. So I am exercising my freedom to not listen and I’m not reading them. I’ve found as a result that I’m happier, my stomach doesn’t get so easily upset, my gums aren’t bleeding, and I swear my hair is coming back. 
 
And to keep things fair, I won’t be writing any comments myself. At least I won’t to any papers using WordPress for their distribution.
 
 
 
 
 

Hello, ‘stat You?

Michael 2 Comments
A dear friend of mine is in a speech contest. The winner would have been eligible to go to Paris for an international competition. Instead she is competing for the chance to speak in front of her computer and whomever joins the Zoom audience.
 
Let me digress here for a moment. How many people heard of Zoom four months ago? Okay, thanks. Just making sure.
 
As I was working with her, listening to thoughts turn into ideas turn into words turn into new thoughts I started thinking about how much of our communication isn’t just words. A good book notwithstanding, words alone have never been an effective means of communication. If they were, Scott Fahlman* would only be known for his work on early artificial intelligence. Communicating includes tone, movement, gestures, and pace to get the point across. I grew up thinking it was my heritage that made me gesture so much but when I got to high school I realized many non-Italains did the same. And it isn’t only the speaker who uses non-verbal skills. I find as a listener I use my eyes often as much as my ears to grasp the message.
 
We live in a time where we can use those non-words to communicate even when we aren’t in the same lecture hall. Facetime, Skype, Duo, and other communications apps moved video calls from the comic books to our living rooms. Zoom, Chime, GoToMeeting and conferencing software took the calls to virtual boardrooms. One hundred years ago during a different quarantine period you would have been lucky to have had a phone. That was only if you lived in the third of the country serviced by the telephone company and you had $3 a month to spend on it (about $40 equalivalent today). Otherwise you were left to pen and paper or very loud yelling to communicate with anybody outside your home. 
 
Next week I have a doctor’s appointment. I won’t be going anywhere beyond my dining room to keep that appointment. I figure that to be where I’ll set up for the video appointment using the hospital’s electronic chart’s telemedicine function. With the proper sensors it will even record my blood pressure, pulse, and respiration rate. I’ll have to weigh myself though and tomorrow I will go in person to the lab. Those results then will be automatically loaded to the charting software. It’s as close to hands-free medicine as you can get so far.
 
TelDoc
I’m okay with some of this. Personally I like a doctor to thump my chest and peer down throat. Hands-on. But in a pinch, this will do. However, I hope all this remote stuff doesn’t take hold too strongly and we can get back to those in person appointments. 
 
And speeches,  live speeches. Let’s not forget about them. (I was hoping for an invitation to Paris too!)
 
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* Scott Falhman is credited with originating the smiley and frowning emoticons in 1982 at Carnegie Mellon University to distinguish serious posts from jokes.
 
 

Undressed for Success

Michael Leave a comment
Over the last few days I’ve been scrolling through various social media platforms because, well, because I’ve always had that kind of time, and I’m picking up on a disconcerting trend. Clothing options are getting scary.
 
I know you’ve seen the posts, “Its 9am. Time to change from my night PJs to my day PJs!” or similar and probably from people who used to be the closest things to fashions plates outside of Project Runway. Now they’re all giving new meaning to “not being a slave to fashion” and in serious jeopardy of being busted by the fashion police. 
 
Work fashions have always been a little out of the average dresser’s realm of understanding. How dressy is dressy? How casual is casual? What can and can’t I get away with? are more likely the questions rather than, oh let’s say, Are my seams straight?   
 
I’ve always worked in health care, almost always in some healthcare facility – hospital, rehab center, nursing home. Over forty years I’ve seen it all. When I started, nurses still wore whites. Not white. Whites. Some even with caps. All with their pins. Scrubs were worn in the OR and never over outside those automatic doors without an accompanying white coat. Down in the pharmacy where I was the uniform of the day for males was shirt and tie, the ladies had blouses and skirts or slacks with short white consultation jackets for staff pharmacists and long white lab coats for supervisors and department heads. Except for those working the IV rooms. There it was either lab coats over scrubs or gowns over street clothes. There was similar garb in the other ancillary departments, x-ray, respiratory, and the various therapies. Non-clinicians like admissions and administration wore suits. Period.
 
That was the routine six days a week. Friday was different. Ah, you are thinking, Casual Friday. Nope. Not then. Work was no place to be casual. Fridays were dress up days. Everybody came in if not dressed to the nines, to the 7-1/2s at least. As soon as the figurative whistle blew, administration, staff, and support proceeded en masse to the nearest adult watering hole. 
 
Somewhere along the way Dressup Friday yielded to Casual Friday but Saturday through Thursday work fashion remained as it was. I’m not sure when that happened. I don’t recall being part of the movement so I think it must have shifted during my years in the service when the army rather than the calendar dictated our dress. But I don’t think it was very much before I returned to civilian life and its itinerant dress because people were not yet debating how casual casual could get. At the time khaki pretty much defined casual. Men shed their ties and may have just opened a collar or taken an extra step to a structured “sport shirt.” Women adopted khaki lower halves either as skirts or slacks and typically pulled a sweater over an open blouse and called that casual. It would be years before anybody even considered denim acceptable and then it was only black, never blue. 
 
Somehow from that we made it to daytime versus night pajamas. Considering in today’s hospital world everybody including the guy patrolling the parking garage is in scrubs and scrubs are just a hop, skip, and tied waistband from pajamas, it was only a matter of time until people started showing up at work looking like Captain Kirk on the bridge of the Enterprise. Only now the screen in front of the helmsman and navigator displays not a possible incursion of the Neutral Zone but instead the morning Zoom meeting.
 
Live long and prosper! Casually.
 
FashionPolice 
 
 
 

Where to Bub?

Michael 7 Comments
An increasingly common topic on social media is the first place people will go once people can go someplace. Considering how much food is talked about it is not surprising that the answer often is a restaurant. I don’t think that will be the first non-essential place I want to go after weeks/months/eons.
 
I have nothing against restaurants. Some of my favorite places are restaurants. Diners specifically. With an occasional dive here and there. And not to infringe on a certain food show, one drive-in. I love a good sandwich and a better breakfast. A good sandwich breakfast is heaven on a plate. Or in a wrapper. Yes, a restaurant is a solid suggestion but just not for me.
 
Other non-essential places that get mentioned are casinos. Again a good suggestion, certainly high on the non-essential list, but not on mine. There are two casinos within an hour drive, one complete with a horse track, and another three casinos just a bit farther. I’ve been to 4 of the 5 and truth be told I have enjoyed the live races on many Saturday afternoons, but I’ve gone years between visits before, I can live with years between visits again.
 
Various stores that don’t have food get mentioned quite a bit. Furniture stores, flower shops, car dealers, and flooring specialists (perhaps somebody whose remodel had been interrupted?) have all been mentioned as places to high tail it to when released. You know I love a good dollar store and there’s an Italian market right around the corner where I would stop at at least once a week and will again when it re-opens but shopping isn’t what I’m putting at the top of the list of things to do that I can’t do now when I can do them again.
 
Sports are on a lot of people’s minds. Not spectating but playing. There are a lot of golfers, bowlers, even archers holed up and just dying to flex their muscles in some area bigger than the average living room. Likewise are gymnasiums and swimming pools high on some people’s lists. I didn’t realize just how energetic and athletic the average American is. But then, I’m not sure the average American realizes that either. I’m not. 
 
For some the first stop after being set free will be a theater, moviehouse, or concert hall. It would be nice to see a movie on a screen bigger than one that fits in my apartment but I’m not sure the first place I want to be is in a small, closed room. Speaking of small enclosures I’ll also pass on joining those whose first venture is “anywhere far from here.” Wherever that here might be, far away from it probably means travel on a plane, train, bus, or [shudder] boat. Eventually … but not top of the list for me.
 
wheredowegoOne place I haven’t seen anybody write as a candidate for the first place to go when going to places will be all the rage again is church. Church, synagogue,  temple, mosque, Stonehenge. Any site of worship. You would think anyone still alive after weeks/months/eons trapped with family, very very close friends, or ourselves and emerging still alive we would want to thank the Almighty. To be honest, as much as I would love to say I’ll be on a beeline for church as soon as the all clear is sounded, I didn’t think of that as the first place I’d go either. Maybe we aren’t as evolved as we think we are.
 
So where will I be heading when the heading can be any heading I choose? I think for as much as the conversation is starting to take root I haven’t been thinking of it. I suppose anywhere I can be closer than 6 feet away from anybody will do for me.
 
And where will you go? 
 
 
 

A Special Easter Story. Corona-style

Michael 2 Comments
Spring time is synonymous with rebirth. Odd that the two big religious spring holidays, Easter and Passover, have so much death associated with them. As I’ve noted before, I mention these because these I know. I’m sure many of the other 4300 and some religions of the world may also ruminate on death during spring’s promise of new life.
 
Christian’s know before we can rejoice in Easter’s glory of Jesus Christ’s resurrection He must die. Today, Holy Thursday, would be the last day He sits, eats, and enjoys the company of friends. Depending on the gospel, the meal Jesus would eat would be the first day of or the day before Passover in that year, which commemorates God passing over over those who marked their lintels with the blood of the sacrificed lamb so they would be spared the killing of the first borns of Egypt.
 
So much death going on while trees are blooming and flowers are starting to open to the increasingly warming sun. But if not for the despair how would we make joy?
 
We are going through our own versions of events that made Easter and Passover the redemptive celebrations they are. And we may be doing a fairly poor job of it. Not even considering the (hopefully) extreme approaches of those who routinely add comments to the end of online news articles placing blame on anybody they dislike or disagree with, the (hopefully) typical approach of self-isolation is with, at best, reluctance. We all look for a reason to go out, a new definition of essential, or any opportunity to “exercise.”
 
The Christian belief of the events of today include Jesus washing of the feet of the disciples. Often lost in the other preparations for Easter, secular and religious, the story of the washing of the feet is one of the  most important lessons of the Bible. It is not only a symbol of humility and service but of love, the unconditional love that is expected of us. “Love one another as I have loved you.” Certainly without a thought of reward but also without complaining or devolving into a litany of “why me’s.
 
Never in our lifetimes has society as a whole been as preoccupied with the day it will be all over so we can truly celebrate. Would we not appreciate the celebration even more by truly denying ourselves of worldly pleasures now? We could not find better examples than those in our faiths, whatever you call yourself or whomever you follow, and deny yourself so you can love each other now and trust that there will be a later when when you celebrate with affirmation that as you have loved, you are loved.
 
Before we can celebrate the joy we must recognize the death. Before we can celebrate freedom we must experience denial. Before we can think about what it will be like when this is all over we must accept that it isn’t just yet. But it will be. This is our great sacrifice that will lead to our great relief. And it is a great opportunity to love your neighbor. No exceptions. 
 
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Still Singing

Michael 2 Comments
A, B, C, D, E, F, G…
 
Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday to me, …
 
Karma, karma, karma chameleon…
 
If I were a rich man, 
Daidle deedle daidle
Daidle daidle deedle daidle dumb.
All day long I’d biddy-biddy-bum,

If I were a wealthy man.

Are you still singing while you wash your hands? Are you still washing your hands? It’s a valid question. Mankind in general is not known for neither patience nor perseverance and washing your hands for a full 20 seconds every time you go to the sink takes both in quantities not many of us have. And it’s only been a few weeks. You should get used to it.  Even in the absence of a pandemic you should get used to it but I’m thinking we are probably in for a longer ride than just a few weeks. Or even months.
..
Do you realize this isn’t the first pandemic to hit the world in the first quarter of a century? Let’s review:
  • 20th century, 1918-1920, Spanish Flu, 50 million dead
  • 19th century, 1817-1824, Cholera, 25 million dead
  • 18th century,  1710, Smallpox, 8 million dead
  • 17th century, 1603-1685. Plague, 3 million dead
  • 16th century, 1520, Smallpox, 56 million dead
  • 15th century (Quiet, but there weren’t that many people left.)
  • 14th century, Plague, 1330 – 1353, 200 million dead!

Okay, so I cheated on the 14th century but I bet the Black Death as it is so famously known had its actual beginnings before 1325. You don’t just wipe out 60% of the population without a running start. And there were others...

Except for the two smallpox outbreaks do you notice something. None look like they were over in just a few weeks. You can tell by the way they stretch over years. One over an almost entire century. I don’t know how much a factor it will be in minimizing our duration, but sticking to those 20 second handwashings along with the social distancing and otherwise minimizing contact will be a positive factor. I’m just not sure if we can call it a possible factor. Like I said, patience and perseverance aren’t our strong suits.
..
Look at the most recent respiratory pandemics, all post 1950 so they are all within some of our lifetimes and all within the ages of mass communication, modern medicine, and soap. The Asian Flu pandemic of 1957-1958 killed 1.1 million people worldwide. The Hong Kong Flu of 1968-1970 was responsible for 1 million deaths. The Swine Flu pandemic hit from 2009-2010 and killed approximately 250,000 people. (As of April 7 COVID-19 deaths worldwide total about 75,000. COVID-19 was first reported in December 2019, noted a worldwide public health emergency by the World Health Organization on 30 January 2020 and then declared a pandemic on 11 March.) All of these stretched over at least 2 years. Viruses are sneaky little devils and they hide out well.
..
I would like to say at least the death totals are going down but the latest numbers have COVID-19 responsible for a third of the number of deaths of the Swine Flu in less than 4 months.
..
Next week I’ll post another more lighthearted take on something happening around me but for now, let’s get back to singing those songs, staying in, and, particularly now when every worldwide religion is celebrating some holiday, praying if you got them.
..
Alright, altogether now:
Wash, wash, wash your hands.
Scrub them in the stream
Vigorously, vigorously, vigorously, vigorously.
Ain’t life just a dream?
(Repeat)
..
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Cleaning Up

Michael 2 Comments
I hope there are some really clean people out in my neck of the woods. They must be because they have all the soap. Not just sanitizer and hand soap. Not just bleach and alcohol. Not just detergents and wipes. But the most critical of cleansers, body wash! Specifically, my body wash.
 
steam-300x336Years of prednisone use has thinned my skin so much that removing a bandaid usually means removing the top layer of skin with it. As a result I don’t use many bandaid but I do use a lot of moisturizers. Years ago I discovered a version of Dove body wash with a deep moisturizer that complements its cream moisturizing lotion and ever since I’ve been happy in my skin. Normally I have several containers or the stuff but I found my cupboard bare and on a recent attempt to restock all that was on the store shelf in its usual spot was dust. Not only was my cherished deep moisture version gone, so were the light moisture, sensitive skin, gentle exfoliating, and something called “cool moisture” varieties, and also missing were the store brand copies of all the ones apparently considered fit to copy including the decent copy of my deep moisture. What to do?
 
I needed something so I scanned the equally empty shelf locations of Dove’s competitors and found nothing except the odd designer wash priced to impress. (I wasn’t.) That left only one option…the men’s section.
 
I don’t know if any of you have ever tried to buy “men’s” soap. Where TV sitcoms would have you believe men typically shower with one all-purpose jug-o-clean combining soap, shampoo, conditioner, and deodorant, the reality is that the men’s toiletry section presents more options than the soft drinks and water aisle. It is possible to find a men’s soap that includes a decent moisturizer. What isn’t possible is to find a men’s body wash that isn’t scented. And they are all weird scents.
 
Men’s soaps and washes, along with the shampoos and conditioners that really do come in separate bottles, have scents not found in nature. To go along with the train of thought they have names that describe nothing. Clean. Fresh. Sport. Energizing. Invigorating. Active. Quench. Now what hell does “Quench” smell like. Actually it doesn’t matter. They all smell the same, menthol. Just different intensities of menthol.
 
It’s a good thing I keep bar soap in my socks and underwear drawer as my “men’s sachet.” It was either that or order some cedar and fir scented Spit and Polish (honest, look it up) which at least are two real things I might recognize when I smell them.
 
And don’t forget to wash your hands.
 
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Booming Business

Michael 3 Comments
In the midst of non-essential businesses curtailing operations, the temporary closing of schools and businesses, and the actual loss of some businesses already, there are some operations that are operating and operating at full speed and then some. 
 
Grocery stores, general merchandisers, and warehouse clubs are adding personnel to clean, stock, pack, and sell. Delivery services are increasing their driving corps. States across the country are lifting reinstatement and reciprocity criteria so retired and out of state health care workers can fill needed additional positions. Cleaning services, particularly in health care facilities can use every extra body they can get behind a cleaning cart. 
 
But there is another profession nobody saw the need for six weeks ago. And frankly I’m not sure I see the need even now but they have exploded on to the scene. They are the sign language interpreters. Other than at times of natural disasters these are people nobody ever sees. And then they are only seen somewhere in the vicinity of the governor or mayor or disaster relief coordinator. If the interpreter is not close enough to be in the same camera shot as the speaker, he or she gets a special circle superimposed on the screen. Why?
 
I’m not being callous. I believe the hearing challenged deserve to be kept abreast of the important news of the day but who decided they only need to be kept so abreast during times of major calamity. Apparently that is the only time they matter. There is nobody signing the daily news. If it is important enough for the hearing public to know that the city school prom has been cancelled and there will be a porch concert this weekend, is it not be equally important that non-hearing viewers of the news get that information? Would it not actually make more sense that the weather report that forecasts the coming hurricane be signed for the hearing impaired rather than the after the fact recognition that a hurricane came by and did a lot of damage. In my experience you don’t need to be able to hear to recognize that the beachfront is closed until further notice.
 
And why are the words of only governors, mayors, or disaster relief coordinators translated. Why doesn’t the President get a sign interpreter. Before you run off with the litany of Trump jokes and “they should be glad they don’t have to hear him” comments, Mr. Obama never shared a television screen with a signer in a bubble either. You’d think the hearing challenged might be interested in an occasional State of the Union address.
 
Oh, wait a minute. You’re going to say the news and other televised events don’t need an interpreter because they are all available now with closed captioning. Then why are they at the disaster coverages? Are they not captioned also? It can’t be for the reporters who are there and not watching on telelvision, and who else but reporters are at the press briefings? Even so, that would be an extremely difficult position to put a non-hearing reporter. There are actually three common American English sign languages (American Sign Language, Pidgin Signed English, and Signing Exact English) and none is a direct translation of the spoken word. It is estimated that at best 80% of the spoken word can be accurately translated and interpreted as intended, a little over 60% is the average translation rate. Is that good enough for the news?
 
So you see, that’s why I’m not so sure that it there is such a need for the sign language interpreter. But I’m not so sure that there isn’t either. And all that is okay. At least they are out doing something, even if people aren’t sure what that is. They are out there doing their thing, providing a service, adding to the information pool.
 
And if it seems like they are there only at disasters and only when the cameras are rolling that gives them a lot in common with those they are translating. 
 
Now,
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Selfish Is…Deuxième Partie

Michael 6 Comments
Was is just 4 days ago I posted a sort of breezy, lighthearted look at our new normal? (Surely you remember the new normal way to make a frozen cappuccino at home.) Unfortunately the weekend brought us back to lots of the old normal of name calling, blame laying, and old fashioned selfishness.
 
As more and more cities, counties, and states across the US and many other countries are falling under shelter in place orders, this from the letters to the editor section of the local paper is an example of what is unfortunately becoming a common response:
 

Once again, we are sacrificing the future of the young for the sake of the old. We could, at considerably less cost, attempt to keep the economy functioning at a high level, and safeguard seniors.

People over 70, and all those at high risk, regardless of age, should be banned, not encouraged, from leaving their homes. Resources should be made readily available to them: free delivery of groceries, medicines, even alcohol. Old people love “free.” They even exercised when Silver Sneakers was introduced, so I’m sure most would go along with this in an effort to save the country.*

 
More than other comments that follow every online article about the impact of the novel corona virus this letter struck me as a particularly insensitive read. I don’t know if I should preface this with “oddly enough” but oddly enough in Allegheny County, Pennsylvania, my home county and that of the letter writer, those over 65 testing positive with COVID-19 account for only 14% of the total, and the 25-49 age group made up 45% through Sunday, March 29. Perhaps the young adults also need some risk mitigation.
 
The writer’s cut-off age interested me. How did 70 become the magic number? Is that how old his or her parents are? Or grandparents? Is that the age the letter writer thinks is the average American’s life expectancy so anybody over that is in bonus time anyway? The average life expectancy in the U.S. is 78.7 years. Pennsylvania is a little less friendly to the elder crowd with an average life expectancy of 78.3 years. Perhaps the writer knows Allegheny County is stingier still with a 77.9 year expectancy. Still that is many years from 70. Maybe the writer is willing to sit at home for 7 years and 10 months now to get a head start on … on what I’m not exactly sure. (Life expectancy data generated by the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation.)
 
I have to admit I smiled a little at what the letter writer must think are the greatest concerns of our senior members of society – “grocery, medicine, even alcohol.” Is that what we are considering the new necessities of life? What, no free delivery of the TV Guide or People Magazine? Perhaps he or she should pick up a Bible. Whether in Matthew or Proverbs or Deuteronomy there are plenty of references to man not living by bread alone. Are the septuagenarians and older never to be allowed to worship as they wish? I suppose we dispense with their freedom of religion, not to mention that of speech and assembly. We will give them plenty of freedom of fear though. Oh, it’s supposed to be freedom FROM fear. My mistake. But hey, you gotta love that “even alcohol” tucked in at the end of the writers list of necessities. “With alcohol all things are possible” is the new battle cry, right after “wash your hands” or maybe “drink heavily and lick your hands.” I’m wondering if that might a window into our writer’s personal wish list of essential items he or she is having difficulty securing during our time of sheltering in place. The virtual happy hour is not so happy when you all you have left is the company and conversation. 
 
But then the writer wants to take away company and conversation. He or she wants the oldest Americans “banned, not encouraged from leaving their homes.” Although the CDC is in fact encouraging seniors and those most vulnerable to remain indoors as much as possible, all health experts agree that isolation is itself a deterrent to healthy living. Valtorta and Hanratty* conclude “Lonely or isolated older adults are at greater risk for all-cause mortality,” and “The effect [of loneliness or isolation] is greater than that of other well-established risk factors for mortality such as physical inactivity and obesity, and comparable with cigarette smoking.” Clearly this is why among the list of permitted out of home activities (grocery shopping, medical appointments, and such) exercise is included.
 
The writer also seems a little confused about the cost of “free.” He or she singles out the Silver Sneakers program which is most often identified as a Medicare Advantage plan additional benefit available to Medicare recipients at age 65. I wonder if the writer realizes Medicare is not free. Even those plans on TV advertised as “zero premium” plans aren’t zero dollars. Those advertised premiums are in addition to the basic premium the government charges seniors. Medicare premium payments are withdrawn every month from the Social Security payment. In those odd instances when an individual receives Medicare but is not drawing Social Security benefits, a bill for direct payment is sent. (Something to keep in mind if Medicare for All mimics the current Medicare program. Free it isn’t.)
 
I’m most distressed over the assumption that we are “sacrificing the future of the young for the sake of the old.” What happened to “30 is the new 20,” “40 is the new 30,” “60 is the new 40?” There is no old, at least according the merchandisers there isn’t. Or wasn’t. “At what age do you begin to not care?” the cosmetics company asks. I suppose we should be asking, “at what age do you begin to not care about?” Considering that the 25 to 49 year olds are responsible for nearly half of the identified positive cases in the county should the under 18 group with less than 2% of all positive results be asking that largest group of infected individuals to be sequestered so the truly young’s future is not sacrificed for the sake of that of those older, even if those older aren’t what we might consider old? You know, geese and ganders and all that.
 
Over a spring weekend that saw nature act as normal bringing 17 tornadoes to the middle of America we need to stop following our own natural instincts and be better than normal. We need also to be nice. I could have been nicer myself and not used a few hundred words to disparage somebody’s Freedom of Speech. I’m sorry I wasn’t as nice as I want others to be. I’ll do my best not to let it happen again. Just not today. 
 
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* This is the complete, unedited letter, “Keep Seniors Home,” to the editor, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, March 30, 2020. 
 
**Valtorta N, Hanratty B. Loneliness, isolation and the health of older adults: do we need a new research agenda?. J R Soc Med. 2012;105(12):518–522. doi:10.1258/jrsm.2012.120128
 

In the Relentless Pursuit of Normal

Michael 2 Comments
What do table tennis, magic coffee cream, concealed carry permits, and toilet paper have in common? I don’t know but they all have starring roles in today’s post.
 
ping-pong-paddleDid you know Pennsylvania is the second largest gambling center in the United States? Nevada by far brings in the most revenue garnering a little over 25% of the American dollars legally wagered, but Pennsylvania casinos saw over 3.25 billion dollars (Billion with a B) cross the felts or fed into machines. With the state’s casinos on lockdown card players and slots junkies can scratch their itches easily enough with online betting and in severe moments of needed relief, calling the family around the dining room table and issuing Monopoly Money for impromptu quality time AKA blackjack. But what is the sports betting public to do. The online casino sites include sports betting but there are no sports to bet on. Or are there? Enter Russian table tennis. The mobile sports app associated with one of the area casino’s sports book operation reported 56% of last weekend’s bets were on the Table Tennis Cup matches in Moscow. On the other side of the state the same app operating for another casino saw 79% of the wagers on the cup matches. I couldn’t find a total dollar amount bet on table tennis but an internet search returned multiple pages of strategies and handicapping for betting on this week’s games. And you thought it was something played in garages by teenagers who couldn’t get dates to the prom. (Why yes, that is where and when I learned the game. And your point is?) And life becomes normal,  sort of, for the sports junkie gambler.
 
Who would have thought 1 cup of sugar, 1/3 cup of instant coffee crystals, and 2/3 cup of ice water would save the world? Would you? Perhaps not the world but certainly those on it used to starting their days with a $6 cup of sweet, creamy caffeinated goodness. Apparently you just toss the sugar and coffee with a splash of the water into a bowl and mix until everything it is wet, then start whisking like crazy while slowly adding the ice water and then keep on whisking for several to many minutes until light and fluffy. Those without Incredible Hulk like arms will probably want to use a stand mixer with a balloon whisk attachment. Sugar and water do not typically result in something with the consistency of whipped cream but that’s exactly what this concoction turns out like! Top your regular old black coffee with the stuff or blend a couple tablespoons of it with a generous portion of ice cubes and a bit of whole milk for a home version of otherwise expensive drive through frozen cappuccino and make your morning commute to the home office and/or dining room table almost normal.
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MagicCoffee
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In Pennsylvania you are required to have a concealed weapon permit to carry a gun unless you want to strap it on your hip and mosey through the streets old wild west style. By the state definition “concealed” includes transporting weapons in the car even if visible except for going to or from gun dealers, shooting ranges, or vacation homes, or to surrender the weapon at a weapons turn in location. So if you plan on ever taking that gun anywhere you better get a concealed carry permit. Permits are issued by county sherriff offices and several counties have closed their gun permit offices during The Corona Crisis. (That’s what I’m officially calling it now. If the network news can make up a name to promote impending armageddon so can I!) Anyway, the day before the the office in my county closed they issued over 200 permits to carry concealed. And it’s a good thing they did because since The Corona Crisis hit, gun sales have increased by as much as 600%. (Actually, according to the organization  Firearms Owners Against Crime, sales are up 100 to 600 percent. (Oh I hope their members are more accurate than their analytics experts.)) Why the sudden increase in gun sales and permit requests? “A lot of my friends already have it, so I kind of felt like I should get it too,” one person told a local television news reporter. And the testosterone fueled Jones Keeper Uppers are functioning just like normal. 
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tpI was at the grocery store yesterday. That’s one of the places we are allowed to go. Grocery store, pharmacy,  medical appointments,  and out for walks or exercise as long as we maintain the now normal social distance.  That is unless you are an essential employee at an essential business in which case you can go out to get to and from there. Low and behold, there was toilet paper! Enough options that toilet paper math wasn’t out of the question. As I sauntered through the store with my freshly wiped down cart I noticed all the shelves had something on them. Well, almost all. There was milk, bread, eggs, fresh and canned meats and fish, fresh produce, frozen foods, beans, flour and other baking needs and soap, alcohol, and other cleaning products. Everything except the always unavailable hand sanitizer. And rice. Of all the different types of rice in all the different types of packages there were none to be found. All I could think was that some family is going to be awfully tired of stir fries by September. And just like that, even as the supply of toilet paper seems to be normalizing, hoarding has gotten it’s new normal.
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Although my normal lifestyle can be confused with self-isolation and social distancing even I now get bored a little faster and miss stopping to chat with fellow walkers around the complex. I know it is not going to be in the next few weeks but I’d bet we’ll be back to our normal normal sooner than we think. At least I would bet if I knew how to use one of those mobile sports betting apps. I would also bet that as soon as the normal normal becomes normal again, six dollar frozen coffee drinks will be back to being the normal caffeine of choice on normal commutes. I’m willing to wager many of those carry permits never share pocket space with what the permit permits carrying and someday rice will again fill the rice and grains aisles but it will never replace the paper products aisle and toilet paper math for shopping fun for the whole family! (Yes, that is one of my favorite posts.)
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Now go wash your hands!
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