Category House and Home

What MPG Does Your Cup Holder Get?

Michael Leave a comment

Sometime in a different century when mini-vans only held 7 passengers and only a couple of manufacturers even made mini-vans, one of the Chrysler divisions (that was back in the days when Plymouth was more than just a rock) highlighted in their advertisements that their mini-vans sported 10 cup holders.  This was in a vehicle that sat only seven people.  Why would any vehicle need more cup holders than passengers?

There are a few people who can manage to get from Point A to Point B and keep nothing in their cup holders other than sunglasses, spare change, or dust.  Those people are to be envied.  Last evening He of We was getting himself ready for the drive to work this morning and had to make sure that there was a bottle of water chilling in the refrigerator for that ride and that the travel mug’s lid was somewhere close to the travel mug, all while pondering if he should leave a few minutes early for a breakfast treat on the way in that would include a large iced tea.  Let’s see, that’s a 3 cup holder requirement for only one rider.

Not to be outdone, Daughter of He routinely leaves the house every morning with a coffee and a smoothie.  Another multi-cup cup holder needer.  (Someday we’ll explore the current smoothie world.  Back in the day when seven passenger vans sported 10 cup holders, smoothies called up images of fruit blended with ice or ice cream and were prone to cause cold headaches.  Today those same called things include nuts, berries, grains, seeds, yogurt, and juices.  They still have fruit but no ice cream.  What fun is that?  But back to the cup holders.)

This got us to thinking.  Just how many cup holders are there out there?  Out there being on the driveway.  He’s chariot has 8 cup holders and five seats.  Four of those cup holders are in the front seat.  The front seats that hold two people.  That’s two cup holders per person up front.  The still means that if He and Daughter of He were to car pool, there could be some days one may have to ride in the back just so there will be enough holders for all the cups.

So that brings us to the real quandary of this.  These two aren’t alone in their liquid refreshments commute.  He knows that because he has seen the occupants of other vehicles’ cup holders in his work’s parking spaces.  They are just as crowded.  So the question is: are all these people really drinking all that much just to get to work?  Is it a daily test of bladder control in preparation for the morning meetings?  Or is it just to have a variety available to match the commute’s traffic mood?  (And if it was going to be for that reason, why aren’t more of those cups holding a good shot of bourbon?  Um, passenger side only!)

Those guys in Detroit back in that former century might have had something.  Nobody talks of engine displacement or horsepower anymore.  Wheel size that once seemed so important is today’s unknown.  Gas mileage always shows up on the ads but it’s just a number to compare models.  The number of air bags pops up in commercials more often than price but neither of these is a big selling point.  Will they really make or break the deal?  But watch a dealer try to sell a car without a cup holder.  It might not be on the spec sheet but it will get asked about during the test drive!

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Too Much Information

Michael Leave a comment

“I just got those same plants at ‘Dirt Cheap Nursery’ and paid $30 less than you.”  That was the greeting She of We got as she rolled her cart into the checkout line with her bounty of spring flowers.

It wasn’t long ago that He of We was waiting patiently with a shopping cart of items soon to be paid for that someone passed by him and said, “I just got that [thing] at ‘Big Box Store’ cheaper.”

She of We is certain it’s some sort of affliction from which we suffer.  We seem to be the type of people that others just want to engage.  Everybody has at least one story that begins, “I was walking down the aisle and this lady came up to me, held up a sweater and asked if that color makes her look pale.”  We get that every time we’re in a store.  But it doesn’t stop there.  It continues on to why the lady is looking for a sweater, why that particular color called to her to begin with, how she had worn that color before and sometimes received compliments and other times disapproval, and had we ever used that mayonnaise made with olive oil.

People are now beginning to critique our price recognition skills.  They are most probably just trying to be helpful.  Unsolicited so but still helpful.  And that makes us wonder, what are we to do with all this information?  Do we bolt out of line and return the offending items to their former places on the store shelves?  Do we ask for proof in the form of an advertisement and/or receipt?  Do we challenge the price check person’s memory?  Do we smile politely and hope the line moves fast enough that we don’t hear from these people again?

We suppose we should be happy that we don’t project the impression that we’re not civil and will snap at anybody who violates our space – physical or economic.  It is better to be personable than to be disagreeable.  And someday, somebody might actually present worthwhile information.  (We question the $30 cheaper flowers when the total was only going to be about $70.)

Until then, we’ll continue to suffer our affliction.  If it makes others feel good, who are we to take that feeling away?  We’d like to mention though that we are getting tired of being part of the sweater shopping experience.  Jewelry.  Now that’s a different story.

And in case you’re wondering, the olive oil mayonnaise isn’t bad.  You should try it sometime.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Tell That to an Old Wife

Michael Leave a comment

It was just a week or so ago that She of We was working about in her yard and came into contact with some poison ivy to which she usually has a fairly severe reaction.  She rushed to wash off as much of the oil as fast as possible and suffered only a mild case.  This led to some talk of the oft told remedies for skin irritations and do they actually work?  We couldn’t let that discussion go without sharing it with you.

The first one we thought of for treating poison ivy was baking soda.  Actually, baking soda is supposed to work for a variety of skin issues not to mention stomach issues.  There’s probably come connection there.  Back to the skin, apparently baking soda will neutralize the oils in poison ivy and will relieve the itch of it.  To be doubly certain of it working, make a paste of the baking soda not with water but with vinegar.

A newer to us old wives’ tale involving poison ivy is to coat the area with olive oil.  We’re not so sure about this one.  Since the offending agent of poison ivy is an oil one would think that adding more oil to it would make it spread.  Those who support this action say the oil in olive oil lifts the oil from the poison ivy off the skin and makes it wash away easier.

Many people swear by grease cutting soaps, including mechanics’ soaps to lift the oil off the skin.  For those who don’t have fully stocked garages, Dawn dish soap appears to be very effective in removing the poison ivy oil from the skin.

For as much a reaction to poison ivy that She encounters, He has the same issues with bee stings.  His reactions can be so severe that his favorite remedy is to run away whenever bees show up.  Although it’s hard to run away from poison ivy, prevention is still the best treatment.  Wearing long sleeves, long pants, and gloves are the best remedy any old wife has come up with yet.  Not to be completely outdone, however, there are those who would also encourage a coating of a heavy barrier cream like zinc oxide over the skin to provide a protective lawyer between the skin and the plant.

So now that spring is here and it’s time to put our yards in order for a beautiful summer, go on out there and yank those weeds.  But remember, it can be a jungle out there.

*** A big word of CAUTION when dealing with poison ivy, bee stings, insect bites, or any allergic reaction – these can be deadly.  Home remedies only work if you are dealing with mild skin reactions.  If you become short of breath, experience swelling of the tongue, neck, or throat, or are dizzy, call 911 and seek professional help immediately.  ***

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

Don’t Keep Them Down on the Farm

Michael 1 Comment

Around our part of the world May heralds the beginning of Farmers’ Market Season. The weather is breaking into a comfortable spring/summer pattern and the local growers are breaking out what they’ve been working on all winter.

Farmers’ markets get the buyer as close to buying local as one can get. When dealing with fresh foods, buying local is never bad.  And at our markets, fresh food doesn’t just equal produce.  Here we’ll also have farmers who prepare their own sausages, jellies, pickles, and even baked goods. A trip to the farmers’ market is like a trip to the market.

Now let’s take it yet an extra step.  At our markets we also have entertainment.  At one market in the city’s downtown, there will be a concert presented by the local opera company every week.  It will also showcase featured vendors every week.  And to round off prepared food choices, food trucks will offer their special provisions.

It wasn’t always like this.  Ten years ago the markets were apples, corn, greens, tomatoes, peppers, squashes in chip baskets stacked neatly in the backs of pick-up trucks.  Somewhere along the way they morphed into events people planned their weeks around becoming social occasions as much as opportunities to experience fresh food items.  Still the center of attention is the produce.  Now it has a full supporting cast.

Are we getting a little nutty over something as simple as local harvest?  Perhaps we are.  City dwellers and near suburbanites look forward to opening of the farmers’ markets as much as they do the opening of baseball season, swimming pools, and spring clearance centers. For months the only fresh ingredients we’ve had for our dinner recipes have been the herbs grown in small pots scattered about the kitchen.

A handful of fresh strawberries scattered over fresh greens with a fruity vinaigrette drizzled over it may not seem like much but after a few months of bagged salads it can be the crowning glory of the evening meal.  In a few weeks one will be able to assemble an entire royal feast.  And that includes the flowers on the table.

You can’t get any fresher than that.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

 

The Family That Plays Together

Michael Leave a comment

Sports are a great example of sibling rivalry gone good and good things passed on from generation to generation.

Start with the current Stanley Cup Playoffs with parts of the Staal and Sutter dynasties facing each other. They hope to join the 10 of 73 families who have played with or against each other for the cup. You don’t like hockey? Let’s move to the other playoffs going on, the NBA. There have been over 25 pairs of brothers playing in the NBA, 4 of them this season. A like number of fathers and sons have dribbled across the hardcourt.

Moving outside, 8 sets of brothers are playing baseball this year. There is even a set of umpire brothers out there, safely stated. Football is tops in family gatherings. In its history, 348 sets of brothers played in the NFL. And before researching this we came up just with the Mannings.  That put us 12 short of the brother sets who were on the field last season.

All of this was brought to mind when we sat down to watch this year’s Kentucky Derby. Brothers Jose and Irad Ortiz saddled up together, each for his first run for the roses. Had that ever happened before? In a sport where the horses could all meet at the same family reunion and where owners and trainers routinely qualify for a family plan, the riders mounting the stars of the show are quite often unknown outside the racing world. We found out that the Ortiz brothers will be the fourth set of brothers to have run in the 140 runnings of the Derby, the first in 30 years when Eddie and Sam Maple rode their mounts around the famed track in 1984. Other brothers appearing at Churchill Downs on the first Saturday in May were Chris and Gregg McCarron in 1976 and Angel and Milo Valenzuela in 1960.

There are a bunch of reasons to say family matters!

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Making Deals With Ourselves

Michael Leave a comment

We’ve all done this.  Lay out the clothes you’re going to wear tomorrow morning before you go to bed tonight.  That’s a five minute savings, or in the vernacular, a half a snooze.  Not washing your hair this morning?  Fifteen minutes saves you two snoozes.  If you’re packing a lunch, pack it the night before and save at least one snooze.  Yes indeed, these are the deals we make with ourselves to get a few more minutes of bed time in the morning, when it seems to be more valuable than at the front end at night.

There are other deal makers we routinely hear of.  Some people will make a whole week’s meals on the weekend so when they get home during the week all they have to do is pull an offering from the fridge, stick it in the oven, and put their feet up for a half-hour rather than slaving over a family meal after slaving for the slave driver at work all day.  And then there are those who will pay their basic utilities – gas, electricity, water, sewage – once a year saving time from writing checks, going on line, or having to deal with “Press the pound key to return to the previous menu” every month.

These are normal deals that normal people make with themselves all the time.  But what if we expand the concept into other areas of our lives?  How much time can we save then?

The rise of quick oil change shops is already saving many a good chunk of time.  No couple of hours at a garage, now it’s a ten minute change.  But over a year that adds up to almost an hour, and that’s if you get at every oil change with nobody in front of you and having to wait though their ten minutes.  What if someone invented a 30 quart oil holder?  Every 3 months or so you push a button, the old oil drains into a holding tank, fresh oil is pumped into your crankcase, and once a year you empty and re-fill.

That daily status meeting with the boss eats up way too much time.  Both of you know it.  What did you do yesterday?  What are you going to do today?  How will this affect tomorrow?  We suggest that once a month is plenty of meeting time.  Five minutes of, “This is what I wanted to do last month and this is what I got done.  We’ll finish up this month.”  Meeting over!  Everybody gets an extra coffee break every day.  With luck the boss will never remember last month anyway.

If you think about it you can save hours every day, get home early, and put your feet up for way more than just a half-hour.  While you there, save some time by taking the time to imbibe in an adult beverage or two with the latest offerings out there, pre-filled glasses.  You don’t even have to pour your favorite tipple from bottle to glass.  That can save you at least enough time for a second.  And if you live in a community that recycles, you’ll be doing your part to keep the landfills empty.

Wow, efficiency and staying green while doing it.  Now that’s a deal.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

Things That Make You Go Yum

Michael Leave a comment

Ah, the signs of spring are with us.  Thunderstorms, hail, sudden downpours.  Actually, these are good things.  They all get the land prepped and ready for the real signs of spring – gardens!  We (that’s She and He) have different approaches to our gardens.  Where She has a green thumb and can make rocks bloom, He has rocks for thumbs and can hardly grow dandelions.   But somehow throughout the summer, there is bounty to be had at both households.

We began our spring ritual last weekend.  That’s where we sit on our respective decks and think out loud of what we’re going to be planting.  We usually begin with the pretty stuff; hanging pots, flower baskets, blooming plants based on time, duration, and color of the good stuff.  That segues into the veggies.  Tomatoes, beans, spinach, onions, zucchini. Cabbages, lettuces, peppers, and potatoes. And don’t forget the herbs.

That’s a lot of stuff for a couple of yards just barely outside the city limits. How do we do it? She starts out with a few things in pots and various other containers on her deck. But then, since She has that green thumb, she also takes a more diverse path. Who’s to say the front yard can’t be a vegetable garden also. Think of some of your veggies. Lush greens, colorful blooms, all the things you want in a showpiece. And show she does. It’s not unusual for neighbors to stop by her driveway and catch her as She climbs her front steps, lavish her with planting praise, and ask for help in selecting flora for their front yards.

He keeps his gardening to pots hanging around on the deck. Some of them literally hanging, suspended from posts and rails. Small tomatoes on small plants in small pots yield big harvests of big flavors. Towers of terra cotta pots hold a variety of herbs. Beans climb up trellises mounted to the rims of planters. All very compact and all providing veggies through the summer.

So why are we telling you this anyway? Because it’s spring! It’s time to start working with the world around us and harvest the best stuff on earth, the fruits (or veggies) of our own labors.

If your goals are bigger than little flower and vegetable plants, tomorrow is Arbor Day. Don’t just sit there. Go plant a tree!

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

(Did we ever tell you of the time we took a tree home in the front seat of the little convertible?)

And If You Order Now…Part 2

Michael Leave a comment

Some time ago we supposed, “We believe that with two you have a spare.  With three you have a collection.” (See ‘With Three You Get Collections,’ Jan. 9, 2012). Hold that thought.

When we last left our heroes, we were wondering how America has managed to create so many different ways of separating one from one’s money without leaving the house. And wondering beyond that if the trend might ever reverse.

We think we have some other trends that have to reverse first. Some time ago, He of We was at a financial seminar where the focus was keeping one’s money. One of the exercises the 30 or so attendees took part in was a card count. Not as in blackjack. As in credit cards. Not debit cards. Not insurance cards. Credit cards. With those 30 or so attendees there were 187 credit cards also in attendance. That’s at least 6 per individual. That’s a collection. If you add in the debit cards there were 245 cards hanging around in purses and wallets. If you run the math you’ll see that is more than one debit card per person. That might be a spare. The whole kit and caboodle is definitely a collection.

Let’s go back to January of 2012. We also said that collections are not rational and just a little obsessive. You might say that makes sense if we are speaking of coins or art or other objects of value and beauty. But credit cards? Yep, even them. Having six credit cards is not rational and a bit obsessive.   It is also empowers the marketers to continue selling to those who haven’t left the house.

The only way on-line shops, infomercials, magazine inserts, and television shopping networks work are if they accept something other than money. The ready availability of credit and debit cards is their ticket to your bank account. According to the Federal Reserve, credit card balances now total nearly $857 billion. With an average of just about 13% interest on that balance, Americans are paying just about $110 billion a year in credit card interest. And since we all seem to have a collection of them, once one is maxed out we can move on to another and never miss the opportunity to buy that $400 purse.

So there we go again with the purse. Is it so terrible that someone sells and someone else buys a $400 purse? No, it’s not. We’d just prefer to see that if someone is going to buy it for $400 that someone has to reach into her, or his wallet and pull out four $100 bills to pay for it. Then it will mean something. But that’s a different post for a different day.

If you too are concerned about the rollercoaster of remote shopping you too can do something about it. Break up your collection and get back to using money. If Capt. Kirk was able to figure out how to do it, you can too.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

And If You Order Now…Part 1

Michael Leave a comment

A local television station recently reported on new shopping sites that lower your costs. Television shopping channels are comparing their prices to those in brick and mortar retail outlets. Infomercials are offering “free” or dramatically reduced trial periods. What do these all have in common? Boy are they expensive!

Selling products remotely is nothing new. You can go back to the sixties and find record clubs that offered 10 albums for a penny. Selling music on TV was a staple then. And the penny sale was the hook they all baited to get you into a long-term arrangement. Get your 10 albums now and agree to buy a certain quantity over time. Don’t like that idea? How about get your 10 albums now and never have to buy another one ever, period. But you would get an album or two every month “on approval.” If you wanted it, you kept it and sent them money. If you didn’t want it, you sent it back by a certain date.

While the record clubs were fine-tuning their pitches, home shopping was starting to take off. The earliest versions were the televised equivalents of the print ads found in the Sunday supplements of every major American newspaper. No longer were you limited to a picture and your imagination about how something worked. Now you could see it in action on your TV screen. The prices were reasonable even though shipping was extra, and you could always count on some special bonus if you ordered a certain dollar amount, usually a “surprise package.” Woohoo.

But the real money was still around the corner. The televised department store. Entire networks were set up to do nothing but sell. All of them had some catchy 3 letter name so they sounded like real television networks. And they all started out as economical alternatives to going to the mall. It’s two in the morning and you’re bored. Let’s go shopping! It won’t cost any more than going out and you don’t have to get out of your jammies to do it.

And here we are today. Television shopping networks, infomercials, print ads, and on-line stores. Somewhere we’ve lost the record clubs but we have Hulu+ instead. No longer are they content with competing with the brick and mortar outlets, they want to be better. Now there are high end fashion sites with real couture. Accessories from shoes to bags to scarves to belts. Jewelry from costume (a few pieces here and there), to this week’s favorite gemstone. We’ve seen purses over $400, rings in four figures, and a dress suited for a red carpet. Don’t worry about the price. There are payments available. Without interest. Is a one-time “Holy Cow” hit to your debit card out of the question? Just make 4 easy payments of “oh-my-gosh” instead and it’s yours.

Do we begrudge those businesses making money. Of course not. Do we begrudge those who buy a purse for more than their weekly salary to carry around in it? Absolutely not. Do we think things are getting out of control? For sure!

In the original Star Trek movie, when they return to the 1940’s Capt. Kirk says to Mr. Spock, “They are still using money.” We’re pretty certain that’s a statement that we never want to make. How do we stop this roller coaster? Part 2 is coming.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?

 

Use As Directed

Michael Leave a comment

Here where we are it is maple syrup festival time.  That’s one of our favorite times.  The only unfortunate part of it is that sometimes festivals overlap and we have to pick one. This year is such a year and we are picking the one with more variety and more vendors to maximize our festival festivities.  It so happens that the festival we selected is one where we have purchased a great deal of arts and craft items, not the least of which was a 5 foot wooden palm tree, a 4 x 5 foot painting, and a tricked out boogie board.  All in the same year if we recall correctly.

It also so happens that quite very recently, He of We changed cars.  No longer is there a large SUV with oodles of cargo space.  Now there is a simple mid-size sedan with a more modest payload.  It was early yesterday morning when He started wondering what we would do without the oodles of cargo space.  Apparently He wondered this out loud because Daughter of We picked that time to remind him, “But Dad, you once took a tree home in the Miata.”

And she was right.  This was not a five foot wooden palm tree but a four foot, live, ornamental flowering peach which now graces She of We’s front yard.  It was transported from store to home, about 12 miles, sitting on the floor in front of the passenger seat of the little two seat convertible that spends its summers being our get-away vehicle.  She spotted the tree and knew just where it should go.  Not having a proper way to transport it did not deter us.  We understood perfectly well that not having a roof means you can carry almost anything.  In the right orientation.  So, into the car it went, behind it on the seat She went, and altogether we went with She holding on to the trunk (of the tree, not the car) to its ultimate destination.

And what does this have to do with anything, other than it surely brought questions to the minds of passing motorists along our journey.  What it has to do is how often we do the opposite of what should be done and still come out just fine.  (That would be the Queen’s We, not necessarily just the us We.)

For example, Every recipe in the world that requires an oven somewhere during the process begins with, “Pre-heat oven to blah-blah degrees.”  Really?   Or does one turn on the oven, do whatever prep is necessary, toss in whatever is going there and says “Close enough, I’ll add 15 minutes at the end.”

Or how about vacuuming the stairs with the large, heavy, upright vacuum cleaner rather than looking for the hose, the extension wand, and the attachment, and then remembering how to put it all together.

All owner’s manuals and most gas pumps warn against “topping off” the gas tank.  Has anybody actually ever seen anybody else calmly pulling out the nozzle when the automatic shut off shuts off?  It we did that how would we ever be guaranteed an even dollar amount at the pump?

Just because we have gotten away with these doesn’t mean you should make it a practice of ignoring the safety rules.  So don’t!  But if you ever see a little red Miata motoring down the highway with a tree sticking out the top, that might not be the best time to remind us to do the same.

Now, that’s what we think. Really. How ‘bout you?