Category House and Home

All Gung Ho, err Gang Ho!

Michael 11 Comments

I was going through some articles I’ve saved and and ran across one from the Pittsburgh Magazine website from this May. The headline intrigued. Enough so that I saved the article to my reading list but not so intrigued that I actually read it. The headline in question…

… From Running Clubs to Naked Bowling, Pittsburghers Find Ways to Combat Loneliness.

I used to bowl a lot and I recall feeling naked if I wasn’t wearing an official bowling shirt, but I don’t think that was where this article was going. Curiosity finally overcame inertia and I decided to take a look at the words that came after those first dozen.

It was after the mention of the city’s Flood Club (which every city with three rivers running through its downtown should have) I came across this:

“We need gangs,” the novelist Kurt Vonnegut once said. Decades of research suggest he was right: In any given year, positive social connections can slash our chance of dying by roughly 50%. Without them, our risk of heart disease, depression and other ailments spike — health effects that Dr. Vivek Murthy, the nation’s former surgeon general, compares to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.

“So yes,” said Vonnegut, “I tell people to formulate a little gang. And, you know, you love each other.”

Naked bowling, the 1936 St. Patricks Day flood, and now gangs. I want to say one of these things is not like the other but really, none of these things is like anything else. I was intrigued-er.

The article went on to say many of the same things we’ve said in our ROAMcare Uplift posts, only like how a professional would write them. People need people. And it went on to detail several third spaces where people needing people gather. Exercise clubs, activity clubs, sports clubs, even a naked bowling league.

The author talked about people needing and finding their people “in gangs of music lovers, movie lovers and lovers of Non-Boring Books. They’re craft-beer lovers and Sick of Drinking Millennials, Nerdy Ladies and Explorer Chicks, Toastmasters and introverts.” Wait. Toastmasters.

Not too long ago I was at a Toastmasters district level meeting. Over the course of this meeting (and just about any Toastmaster meeting beyond one’s home club), the question was asked “why do you continue being a Toastmaster?” I’ve heard many, many long-term Toastmasters answer that question and never have I heard one say, “so I can speak better,” or “so I can become a better leader,” even though those are both in our clubs’ missions.

The most common reason members hang around Toastmasters is because we meet, and associate with, and enjoy the company of others we’d never otherwise spend time with. My personal home club has members who are in finance, engineering, medical research, and restaurant management. They are self-employed, unemployed, semi-employed. They are from figuratively around the block and literally from around the world. There is a tutor, a screenwriter, an author, an investment broker, and one of me. And twice a month we get together and talk about everything but what we do.

We found what Vonnegut said we should look for. Our gang. A gang where we love each other and love being with each other for a half dozen hours a month. Gang ho!

 

 

Perfectly perfect

Michael 10 Comments

It’s Thursday so that means I should put out a (fabulous) post (cleverly) tying in yesterday’s insightful ROAMcare Uplift post. But I can’t think of one so I’ll say goodbye to Brian Wilson, last of the Wilson brothers who with Mike Love and Al Jardine remind us of summer’s good times as soon as we hear any Beach Boys tune. Among the images conjured are surf, sand, and transistor radios on the corner of the beach blanket.

It is interesting that the musical genius behind thighs harmonies was partially deaf. It didn’t seem to hold him back. Proof, I suppose, that difficulties become major or minor according to the severity we assign them. Good, bad, and whatever is in between are a function of us being positive, negative, or apathetic.

Earlier this year I shared a BBC Music video of God Only Knows, which so, so many consider the perfect song. If that is so, this video is the perfect representation of it. Enjoy and celebrate Brian’s genius.

it might not be a great tie-in, but after you listen to God Only Knows, click here and read yesterday’s post, Sailing the Same Sea. It sort of pairs up okay. It’s a nautical theme and is about positivity.

7 Highly Successful Habits

Michael 12 Comments

I have always hated the seeming simplicity of the seventies self-help series. Truth be told, they were mostly from the 80s but I don’t get to use alteration often, so I fudged it. You know the ones I mean. The One Minute Manager, Seven Habits off Highly Effective Name Your Interest Group, The Four Hour Work Week. Mind you, they were transformative and had, and still have great insights, but taken literally you will be a lousy manager, rather ineffective, and likely out of work.

But I found a simplistic approach to life that really can be done in 7 steps, in a matter of minutes, and have oodles of hours leftover for balancing all the life you want. And I found it on the Internet. On social media even! The seven things one must master to become an adult. It was actually one of those cutesy images and its title was ‘7 Habits Every Child Needs to Learn Before They Move Out.’

I have a feeling that the person who posted it might have been holding tongue somewhat tightly to the inside of check, yet still it is the best expression of satisfied human needs since Mazlov drew his pyramid. It is truly to road map and/or GPS directions to a fully fulfilled human type person, stupendous in its simplicity. Unfortunately, I estimate 99.7% of the people out there never mastered, mayhaps never attempted, Habit #7.

What are these magical machinations fledgling humans should be attempting?

1.        Do your laundry. Okay, this was written as what young adults need to learn before moving out of Mommy’s house, but I tell you I know people who do not do their laundry. Grown up people of both sexes and/or genders still transporting bags of laundry from their apartment to parents’ laundry room. And others who use laundry services. This isn’t New York City I live where apartments may or may not have adequate laundering facilities. This is the ‘burbs where washer/dryer combinations are status symbols. Learn to wash you own clothes.

2.        Cook simple meals. I think most semi-adults can pull this off. It might be three different kinds of eggs but I’m willing to go out in a limb and say we got this one. Frozen pizza does not count.

3.        Manage a budget. I’m quite convinced there are too many folks to count who cannot balance a budget. I’d say balance a checkbook but I’m not sure how many people still use a checkbook. If people were good at managing money, why would we be so concerned about needing an account without overdraft fees? I firmly believe banks have gone way the frack overboard with fees of all sorts, but “As long as the machine still takes my debit card, I still have money,” is not a financial plan.

4.        Keep your place clean. I’m not at all against cleaning services. If you can afford a maid, have at it, but know how to handle the basics.

5.        Know how to make appointments. Again, I think most of us can do this. You gotta have one or two gimmes.

6.        Basic maintenance. Yes, the “Check Engine” light means something. Yes, you too might need to work a plunger, and those lightbulbs are not lifetime regardless of what the package says. I’d say this is another gimme.

But now, here we hit the one thing that I think too many adults who have been on their own for decades still cannot figure out, especially those with part time jobs in Washington, DC.

7.        Take responsibility. Need I say more?

Have a happy week!

See a penny, pick it up

Michael 8 Comments

Last week I was called a friend just to chat and the opening line I used was, “HI, what’s new.” “I’m sorting pennies while I still can. I haven’t found any good ones yet.” This was actually the second time in a few months our conversation started thus. Thusly? Started like that.

Last weeks news that the US Mint is officially out of the penny minting business has people across the country breaking into piggy banks looking for elusive billion dollar pennies.

Way way way back, I wrote a post about a someone who paid $1.38 million dollars for a penny. People complain when scalpers ticket brokers charge more than face value for tickets. Nobody said anything about the guy who paid $1,379,999.99 over face for a penny. Okay, so it was minted in 1793, but it’s still just a penny, right?

The chance of you pulling another 1793 penny from your safe deposit piglet is so rare it ain’t gonna happen. The chance off pulling an illusive 1943 or 1943-D penny worth a paltry $1.00 million is close too it ain’t gonna happen either. But digging up a pre-1982 penny is possible. Not probable but possible. In theory, a pre-1982 penny, thanks to its near (95%) all copper makeup, is worth at least three cents.

But is it? Copper is currently trading at about $.01 per gram, those older pennies weigh 3 grams, so they contain about three times their face value in copper metal. Except they aren’t worth 3 cents because as legal tender, it is illegal to melt down coins for their metal weight value.

It has been said the value of any object is how much somebody is willing to pay for it, yet its worth is how much somebody wants for it. Rarely are worth and value equal. If our collections actually cost what we feel they are worth, they would far exceed most people’s ability to pay for them, thus lowering their value. But it is because we place such worth on these objects that give us so much joy that they are so valuable to us. Even pennies.

Was my friend searching for that million dollar treasure or a handful of three penny pennies? Turns out neither was to be found so it didn’t really matter other than it made for a pleasant conversation and a not so worthless blog post. Or maybe that would be a priceless post.

Lucky chances

Michael 5 Comments

I don’t think they still do it but about 10 years ago, the people at BRAVO, put on a show called “Last Chance Kitchen,” that was a second chance for contestants knocked out of their Top Chef competition.

About that same time, Netflix was premiering a series called “Last Chance U” that followed the football programs at very small, community, and junior colleges, attempting to give the athletes there the chance at the exposure those at the major colleges receive.

A last chance saloon (in the wide west, not to be confused with the myriad cleverly named Last Chance Saloons scattered throughout the US and Canada, and the one in England (did you know myriad literally means a thousand?)) was supposed to be the saloon sitting in the border separating a “wet” territory from a “dry” one so folks could get that one more chance at a drink before it was too late.

All these last chances. You’d think Americans live by the “luck of the draw” system. I suppose many do, and even those who don’t, there is no mistaking the contribution luck or chance might have on our lives. That would be luck or chances. Nobody gets just one chance at anything. Really. Stop and think about it. I’m sure you can find a time in your life when you passed on an opportunity and then saw it come back around and sometimes even come back around again.

We looked at the chance of having a decided chance at things in this week’s Uplift, Try Try Again. As we said, “We cannot undo something already done, but we often get a chance to do something that was left undone.”

Not so famous last words

Michael 11 Comments

There are entire books of famous last words. Most of them are famous solely because they were said by famous people rather than being famous because they were profound. There are some that are a little of both. Benjamin Franklin’s last words were, “A dying man can do nothing easy.” The back story – that was in response to his daughter telling him to turn over in bed so he can breathe more easily. Sort of profound on its own. Now that you know the story behind it, it sounds like something I’d say!

Anyway, most last words will never be remembered by someone other than to whom they were spoken, except for last words you see and hear every day.

An exceptionally famous set of last words seldom seen today, was de rigueur in a different century, early in a different century, was “the end,” seen on the last page of every book and last card of every movie.

Other last words often more memorable are the last words you see when that car passes you on the highway and you get a look at their license plate, license plate frame, or bumper sticker. There are some pretty clever examples of two of the above specifies at the links noted. I’ve not yet succumbed to a vanity license plate although the frame I have around the classic plate on Rosemary the Little Red Car reads, “Aged to Perfection. Old Guys Rule!”

I saw an interesting sight just yesterday that I had heard of but never had seen in the wild with my own eyes. A Tesla car with its stylized “T” removed and replaced with a lightning bolt. Not quite a last word but a lasting impression.

A particular type of last word I have a difficult time with is the one to end a text message conversation. Not a quick message like “on my way.” That doesn’t even require an answer. But the conversations that go back and forth for a while, the things that have taken the place of phone calls. Phone calls were easy to end. The last word typically was a simple “bye” plus or minus a dear, hon, or second bye. An e-mail’s last words are like any other correspondence. But a text message. No good way out of that and when you usually decide on a last word, it’s more likely an emoji.

Now I’m not sure what kind of last words would be best to tack on the end of these words. I think I’ll steal Michael Landon’s last words. On his deathbed, his son said to him, “I think it’s time to move on.” Landon’s reply – “You’re right. It’s time. I love you all.” Actually, it’s his last, last words that mean the most. I love you all.

Cite your sources

Michael 12 Comments

Somewhere sometime someone is having a crisis. It’s me!

I’m having a crisis. I am losing touch with the part of the world that feeds me information and I’m worried I am starting to sound like a one of those people who spouts so-called facts that you know aren’t true. Their verity may be questioned without question because they (the facts) are so ludicrous that nobody but a Dimwit Donny Disciple (DDD) would believe them (e.g., did you know gas is only $1.98/gallon), or because they (the fact-spouters) are DDDs or DD hisself.

Believe it or not, this is not a political post. It’s a true personal crisis. I’m forgetting not things, but that which made me aware of the thing. Don’t question. Just read on. It will become clear.

It came to me when I mentioned to my daughter, “I just read somewhere that keeping cut fruit in the fridge in glass containers will add at least 2 days to their use by date versus storing them in plastic.” This isn’t something I dreamed or something I overheard in the produce section while working my way around the gaggle of grocery gals gathered in front of the mango display. This was a real “read somewhere” moment, but I can’t recall where. If it was say in Food Network Magazine, then it’s probably a pretty good tip. Likewise in the food section of the newspaper or a real food expert’s social site. On the other hand, if I read it in the comments section of an online recipe or in the social site of the dingy broad who records entire recipes in 30 seconds and posts them to a site known for lip-synched videos and blasphemous AI generated images, it likely is as true as claims of sub $3.00 eggs (per dozen, not apiece).

This worries me because I always would be able to recite the source of my information as readily as the information. I know I found the cut fruit tidbit in a respected, responsible source, but not being able to recite that source feels like I should be being fitted for a red hat. (By the way, why does the Dummy in Chief always have those stupid hats on its desk in the Oval Office. Is there a merch table at the back of the room to visit between acts?) if I should be challenged in the fresh fruit freshness extension tip, I wouldn’t be able to cite my source other than to say, “I read it somewhere.” Well, that’s not an answer. I might as well expound on the sphericalosity of the earth without doing the math.

So you now understand my crisis. (You do, don’t you?) How will I ever be taken seriously again. How will I ever take myself seriously again. I won’t be long before I begin a conversation with, “I saw somewhere that someone did something that I thought was interesting. What do you think?” My sole reasonable conversation partners will be clairvoyants, mediums (It is mediums not media when you’re speaking of those who communicate with dead, right?) (I figure they’d be a decent one to chat with considering by then I’d be at least brain dead), or DDDs (because they are experienced in listening to unfounded, unproven, unreliable sources of disinformation).

Anyway, I read somewhere than fresh cut fruit stored in glass containers will extend its life. That all I had to say.

Waiting for Summer

Michael 10 Comments

I can really not wait for summer. I had to run out yesterday. Afternoon. The warmest part of the day it was snowing!  I want a day at 72° sunny warmth. It’s not that I don’t appreciate Spring and the necessary rains that lead to burgeoning blossoms, or the cool nights and warm days that get the maple sap flowing that eventually finds its way atop my breakfast pancakes.

We are clearly in the early throes of global destruction. Before you know it, we’ll all be standing around in prehistoric looking rock lined canyons while pelting rain, roaring thunder, and brilliant flashes of lightning become the new white noise that is, or will be, the backdrop to our soon to be extinguished existence(s).

As an aside (you who watch science fiction will understand this), have you ever noticed how when our future space explorers land on a far out there planet, with more intelligent life than we have here, the planets all look like unused sets from Jurassic Park and the intelligent life has tails. But I digress…

How much longer will we have to wait for real warm weather? Up here. Not down along the Gulf of Mexico. Oddly enough, for as ancient as I am, and as many trips as I’ve made south of the Mason Dixon Line, there are only 3 cities in the Gulf I’ve been too, Houston, New Orleans, and Clearwater.  Clearwater was my favorite. Maybe again someday. Now, where was I? Oh right…

When will we get back to reasonable weather? I suppose I should be grateful I’m alive still to see any weather. It sort of reminds me of how always looking to the future we lose our appreciation for the present. And that reminds me of this week’s Uplift post Coming Attractions. Take a look.

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Where were you when…

Michael 16 Comments

The last couple of weeks have had some interesting stories in the news, and I don’t mean articles detailing the machinations of a chainsaw wielding immigrant or an orange skinned man-child. I’m talking about interesting stories, real life stuff.

Although I suppose there was a specific date when the world decided to shut down, the media, social and mainstream, must have gotten together and declared it was early March 2020 and have been busily writing up every 5 year COVID anniversary story they can imagine. How healthcare has changed, how cooking has changed, how exercise has changed, how travel has changed, notable moments in the history of, or the lingering effects on life after COVID. It’s a good thing we had that pandemic or else people would be filling up their column inches (and the pixelated equivalent) with really far-fetched stuff like Presidential executive orders banning skinny jeans or renaming established geographic entities. But I digress.

As much as I enjoyed reading the timeline of recent history almost as much as I enjoyed living through the timeline of recent history, the most interesting articles addressed food. If you were to say that makes sense to you because you know I like food a lot more than I like history, you are right! Even though I did get an A in history throughout my junior high school career or whenever we learn about history because those who do not learn their history are doomed to repeat it.

Apparently, something we aren’t doomed to repeat, or aren’t privileged to repeat, is more home cooking. A U.S. Department of Agriculture survey conducting in 2024 indicated people are spending 55.7% of their food budget on dining out. But…there’s always a but when you start talking statistics…but, according to a national association of restaurants and restaurateurs, more people are ordering take-out and enjoying their dining out dollars at home, including double digit increases in people purchasing complete major holiday meals (think Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter). All this while inflation supposedly had been escalating more rapidly than Dingy Donald’s golf scores. (To be fair (yes,I can be), according to the National Restaurant Association, restaurant prices increased 27.2% from February 2020 to June 2024.)

As I read some of the articles, I discovered new to me 5 year old information. For example, did you know there was a yeast shortage during the pandemic? Now, I am a bread maker. Bread, pizza, rolls. All things yeasty. (Not beer. I’m not crazy about beer and every “home-brew” I have ever tasted seemed to want to challenge rhubarb as the most bitter stuff you can put in your mouth.) Like the rest of the world, I was baking bread nearly every Saturday during the pandemic. But I also was baking bread nearly every Saturday before and since the pandemic, and because I was/am a constant baker (not to be confused with a constant gardener), I buy yeast in 2 pound blocks.  Guess I sailed right through the “shortage” with the couple packs I always have in the freezer. Who knew?

What changes from 2020 are you still living with, or without, or would like to again? Maybe next week we should talk about how exercise has changed. Gotta work off all those bread calories. See you then!

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This or That

Michael 11 Comments

Disingenuous. That’s a great word. It sounds almost polite but there is no mistaking it means you’re about as trustworthy as a fox in a henhouse, as loyal as a Benedict Arnold fan club member, and/or as honest as a politician. Let’s take an average Joe, or your average Donny who rants and raves about immigrants and wants to see them all deported, yet two of his three wives and one of his one mother are immigrants, his loyal assistant’s wife is an immigrant, and his best buddy is not only an immigrant but an illegal one, entering the country on a student visa but never matriculating to any institution of higher learning. That is a good example of disingenuous.

It also doesn’t sound like one, but disingenuous is one of those black or white, this or that, yes or no type words. There aren’t many shades of gray to dishonesty, disloyalty, or distrustwrothiness. (By the way, do you know the difference between gray and grey. One is a color and the other is a colour. Hahahaha!!!!)

Anyway…back to shades of gray. It seems unless one is discussing their own sketchy behavior (behaviour), people don’t like ambiguity. We want a definite yes or no, good or bad, yea or nay, do you or don’t you. I could go on and on. Or on and off.

Of course the worst of the either/or scenarios are when we assign good or bad, plus or minus, love ‘em or hate ‘em qualities to people. Seeking absolutes divides us into “us” and “them,” limiting understanding and the ability to find a common ground. And believe it or not, we’re all pretty common even if we aren’t necessarily all grounded.

This week’s Uplift post explored the idea that in a world where everyone believes themselves to be right, everyone might be wrong, and that admitting the possibility of being wrong can encourage discussion and collaboration to uncover the real truth. If you haven’t seen it yet, take a look. It isn’t too long yet not too short, and neither is it our best work, nor is it our worst. Take our word for it, there’s more right than wrong in it and we genuinely can say that. (By the way, tomorrow’s Friday Flashback further explores this idea. If you join our mailing list today you’ll get an email notice of that tomorrow.)

Uplift 2024-19