Giving Thanks, 2020 Style

I want to wish all my friends an early Happy Thanksgiving, here in the US, and across the world. Every nation has some time during the year sort of celebration of gratitude when we give thanks for what we have. Here we picked late November. I suppose it works out well as a practice for the big meal coming up next month. Anyway, here’s my take on the very first American Thanksgiving which we know wasn’t late November, didn’t include turkey and cranberry sauce, and probably didn’t have any sweet pies for dessert. Never one to let the facts stand in the way of a good story though, we soldier on as if it’s always been this way. There has always been a reason to give thanks. There was in 1621, and believe it or not, there is in 2020 too. Happy Thanksgiving, and enjoy!


Across the United States people are preparing for Thanksgiving. Unlike previous years, this Thanksgiving appears on the surface to be fuller of doubt than gratitude. The CoViD-19 pandemic is raging causing major health issues and fueling uncertainty over the best way to mitigate its spread. Politicians are ranting, adding to divisiveness at a time when we should be celebrating, and mimicking the comradery it took to survive in the time of the earliest Thanksgivings. When past years’ preparations took place mostly in the country’s kitchens, this year’s preparations could be in the hands of tech support for video conferencing apps.

Thanksgiving 2020 will be markedly different from any other Thanksgiving in any of our lifetimes, but perhaps not too different from the Thanksgivings of the 1620s. Tradition holds the first “Thanksgiving” was held in 1621 in Plymouth Colony by the English colonists and the Wampanoag People in celebration of the colonists’ gratitude for surviving their first year there. Almost exactly 400 years ago, on November 19, 1620 the Mayflower neared Cape Cod. Two days later the Mayflower Compact, establishing the first self-governing colony in the New World was signed. That did not mean the Pilgrims were ready to build a statehouse and hold a Governor’s Ball. After over two months at sea, they had not yet landed, although land was in sight. Landfall at today’s Provincetown Harbor did not come until December 11 after having set sail from Plymouth England almost 3 full months earlier on September 16, 1620. Remarkably the little vessel made it across the Atlantic Ocean with all souls save one alive, just a lot of seasickness, scurvy, hunger and thirst. It wasn’t until they landed that things got really hard.

Over their first winter in the new colony, forty-five of the original 102 who set sail died, most from what is accepted now to have been leptospirosis, a zoonotic bacterial disease that for many exhibits only mild discomfort such as headache or muscle pain. Had they remained in the Old World they might not have fared better as the numbers of cases of tuberculosis and typhus were increasing in England and a reemergence of the black plague was working its way across northern Africa. Most of Europe was experiencing economic hardship and in some areas outright collapse as wars waged over exploration rights to New World in the west and supply line interruptions as the Ottoman Empire marched in the east. Though the colonists were far from the Old World and its problems, the New World presented its own. 

 The Mayflower colonists landed already at a disadvantage. They set foot on solid ground soon to be covered in snow. Their seafaring diet was heavily salt laden necessary for the food to last the three month voyage, weakening their muscles sorely needed to construct shelter before they succumbed to the elements. Most of the shelter erected in early winter was destroyed by fire and the colonists moved back onto the ship until spring. Those who survived the winter prepared land for plantings that was likely infested with the leptospira left behind in the urine of the local black rats, setting themselves up for a second wave of the deadly disease.

It wasn’t all bad news. In March of 1621 the colonists met the Wampanoag and signed a pact of coexistence about six weeks later. About that time the Fortune arrived with additional settlers and both ships returned with their crews to England, leaving the colonists (who the crewmembers were certain would starve) and their new treaty partners to survive alone. Survive they did and we continue today the tradition we are told began 399 years ago to give thanks for all we have.

Sometime between then and now, without know it, Charles Dickens may have summarized best why those early settlers would have been thankful and why today we should be even in such seemingly ungrateful times. “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”

Like the earliest Thanksgiving revelers we are now also experiencing a possible second wave or more likely the resurgence of the wave that never left of a pandemic zoonotic infection, already weakened by a deadly first go-round with the disease. Just as in those times the distress extends beyond our corner of the world and we welcome reinforcement against the virus, today in the form of a vaccine. Also like those settlers had, there are strangers willing to help us now. They are the pharmaceutical chemists working on treatments and cures, epidemiologists developing the vaccines, and the anonymous volunteers participating in the vaccine trials. Closer to home there are others who are keeping radio and television stations and newspapers and other media outlets up and running to keep you informed. Closer still are the people stocking your supermarkets and pharmacies, staffing the police and fire stations, working the ambulances and emergency medical services, and working in hospitals and medical offices keeping you fed, safe and healthy, and there are the clergy, the priests, rabbis, ministers and other clerics maintaining all the houses of worship to serve your spiritual needs. And then there are you! The collective you, the strangers to somebody else, helping those you pass on the street or wait behind in line helping your neighbors. You are the helpful stranger mostly staying home unless you have to be out and then washing your hands, keeping your distance, and wearing your mask

When we reflect on our present blessings these strangers are certainly among them. Borrowing from another English writer, C. S. Lewis who told us, “Gratitude looks to the past and love to the present,” I speak for the masses when I say we are grateful for all you have done, and we love to see you are still helping today!


Why did the turkey cross the road?

Driving around here you might see just about anything on the road. Still, when a large turkey led a group of 3 others from one side of the road to the other that I happened to be motoring my way along one morning last week, the first thought I had was “hmm, turkeys.” The second thought was “Oh shit, she’s fast!” (I didn’t have time to consider all the possible gender permutations and for birds, those probably still stop at two) when this one wasted no time strolling over to my open window to see what that crazy human was doing stopped in the middle of where they wanted to walk and what was that thing I was aiming at her. (Or him.)
 
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After I got the window rolled up and the car back in gear and moving cautiously around the mini-brood I had my third thought. Why were the turkeys crossing the road? Why were they leaving the confines of high brush and much vegetation for the open back lot of a used car dealer? I didn’t think they were interested in a slightly used minivan but with turkeys who knows.
 
Some things I thought as the day wore on were:
 
They were released from a nearby turkey farm where the business was downsizing due to the anticipated lessened demand for turkeys, particularly the larger ones, this upcoming holiday season. Although … these seemed of the quite wild variety. Thus my next thought. 
 
They were visiting relatives still held captive at the nearby turkey farm and/or visiting said farm to attempt a release of said relatives due to the anticipated lessened demand for turkeys this upcoming holiday season.  But … that seemed somewhat implausible given that the average turkey is probably more intelligent than the average politician and therefore not given to such flights of fancy as to believe she (or he) (it?) could out talk a farmer, or talk a farmer out of a herd of turkeys. Herd? Flock? Bunch! On to the next thought. 
 
They were off to the large mega mart further up the road in the direction of their travel to take advantage of the discounted pricing of the fall version wrapper of snacks and candies to make way for the winter version wrapper for snacks and candies and in particular to score big on candy corn which has no winter equivalent. Then I realized I was on to something indeed! My final thought.
 
Why did the turkeys cross the road? To get to the candy corn! That perfect, super food that tastes better than kale and doesn’t stain like blueberries with it’s own holiday that’s not Halloween or Thanksgiving. (I know that’s all true because I read it on the Internet not just a year ago. In fact I know that’s true because I wrote it and posted it to the internet not just a year ago. All except the blueberry part. That’s new for this year. Always improving!)
 
So this Friday when you’re looking for something to celebrate other than the impending short reprieve of political ads, National Candy Corn Day is October 30 this year and every year. If you’re one of the weirdos who isn’t a fan of candy corn, cross the road and bring some to me. I’ll be busy looking up small turkey meal plans.
 
Gobble gobble!
 
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Happy Federal Employees Day Off Day!

Happy Thanksgiving all you Canadians, and happy whatever holiday it is that we Americans (U.S. type) are supposed to be ashamed of but we’re glad to get the day off anyway so let’s just change the name for when we are talking on social media or while standing in line at the coffee shop. Woe to he or she or they or it or whatever is the right way to refer to him or her or them who dare utter the name Columbus. Don’t you know what he did to the true and rightful Americans (native type except not native as in one who was born here)?  From whence did all this vitriol come? Not the faux vitriol or he, she, them, it, and/or who or whatever. The frank vitriol being spewed by me! Well, I’ll tell you. Come sit and listen.
 
It was Sunday afternoon and I was out for a ride with my dear friend who had just travelled 3,000+ miles to visit and be able take such a ride. We were speaking of mountains, anticipating a trip to the nearest mountains, the Alleghenies, an mid-range of the Appalachians, to do some fall leaf watching. “Who named the mountains?” she wonder aloud. Without thinking I said, “I’m not sure. Around here almost everything was named by the original tribes.” Yes, that’s exactly how I said it. Not Native Americans, not Indigenous People, not [shudder] Indians. The original tribes. 
 
See, here there were several nations and tribes around here and many are still recognized as the names of towns or schools or rivers though not necessarily as nationals. Iroquois, Shawnee, Seneca, Chippewa, and others. Their cultures and language, their religions and even their forms of government differed much like France differs from Poland. Yet “we” the “woke privileged white americans” lump them together as Indigenous American or Native American much like we the same do the same with anybody “we” feel are or have been slighted by “us.” Asian Americans, African Americans, Latino Americans (which I suppose is now Latinx) yet never considering if we really wanted to recognize and celebrate their heritage we would take the time to recognize and celebrate their ancestry. Just as their is a huge difference between decedents of French and those of Polish ancestors so there is a difference between Cuban and Columbian, or Namibian and Nigerian, or Thai and Taiwanese, or even Chippewa and Cherokee. 
 
I don’t really care what you think of Columbus. What he did, didn’t do, thought about doing or wish he had done was done, not done, thought about, or wished for long before I was a gleam in my parents’ eyes. What resulted from those deeds and non-deeds can’t be undone. But what you decide to do or not do or think or dream today and tomrrow and the days after that do matter. So if you want it to matter more than just for as long as it takes for somebody to create an even more politically correct term for anybody who “isn’t like us” how about taking the time to talk to and learn about somebody who “isn’t like you.” You might find out their histories and culture are much more interesting than you read about in 40 characters or less on line.
 
Happy Day!
 
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The TV Dinner and the Hot Dog

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: Places everybody. I’d say let’s get this down in one take but that ship sailed 14 takes ago. Hot Dog, wipe that mustard off your face. Again! And somebody mop the sweat off TV Dinner or it’s back in the freezer. Ok, we’re ready. Roll sound! Roll camera!
 
DIRECTOR: Action!
 
HOT DOG: Happy National Hot Day Day! That’s September 10 to you commoners.
 
TV DINNER: But it’s supposed to be my day, TV Dinner Day. You already had Hot Dog Day on the third Wednesday of July, July 22 this year actually. Today is…
 
HOT DOG: Yes, yes, today is National Hot Dog Day! The hot dog is the greatest food in the world, in the entire universe, and deserves two days. In fact we deserve 2 days every month, every week even! You can never have too many hot dogs! Who wants a nutritionally wimpy salt and fat explosion of bad taste that makes airplane food seem gourmet? You can’t even decide how to dress. You started out all shiny in those aluminum trays with bright aluminum foil covers and look at you now, boxed up in black plastic with that chintzy see through top. Now a hot dog hasn’t changed in four billion years because we were born perfect! 
 
TV DINNER: That’s not true! To begin with you weren’t invented until the 1870’s and didn’t become popular until 50 years after that. Based on a flash freezing process developed in the 1920s TV dinners hit the streets running in 1954 and never lost momentum. And we can be very healthy. It depends on what you pick. A frozen meatloaf with mash potatoes and gravy might have a little more salt and fat than recommended but a baked chicken with broccoli or vegetable lasagna are solid, healthy dinner choices. TV Dinners satisfy whatever mood you’re in. We are what you make of us.
 
HOT DOG: I’ll tell you what I can make of you. Garbage! Look at all that packaging. Waste, waste, waste. A hot dog is all food. And were portable. You won’t find a vendor at the ball yard hawking frozen dinners. You’re called TV Dinners because after somebody gorges on a box of you all they’re good for the rest of the night is watching TV. Hot Dogs on the other hand are the food of the fit. That’s why were at every sporting event around the world! Now go crawl back into the freezer and let me celebrate like the winner that I am!
 
TV DINNER: I think what you’re saying is wrong. Just because you are sold at ball games doesn’t make hot dogs nutritious. Nachos are big at sporting events and you really don’t believe melted cheese on salty chips is good for you.
 
HOT DOG: Oh baby do I love melted cheese! I look fabulous with that gooey yellow goodness oozing out of the ends of my bun. It gives me shivers just to think how much healthier I am with a layer of cheese and maybe even chili too.
 
TV DINNER: Healthier? Are you cra…… No, no, I mustn’t be like that. It might not be fair but if you really believe you need two days I’ll share mine with you. I’d rather give a little and live long and in peace than to spend what little time we have arguing about who is better when we know deep down it takes all of us to make a kitchen full and happy.
 
TVDinnerDogVOICE OVER: Be like the TV Dinner and make the best out of the situations over which you have no control. Don’t fall into the trap of believing the world can’t live without you and you deserve everything you can get. Don’t be a hot dog. Be a winner, winner, frozenchicken dinner.
 
DIRECTOR: Cut! Good work everybody. Thank you
 
ASSISTANT DIRECTOR:  Thank you all. Leave your costumes in the dressing area and check the board for up coming food spots. If you’re interested, have your agents call now.
 
DIRECTOR: We’re doing good stuff here. Let’s eat. I have a taste for one of those little frozen apple desserts. How about you?
 
 
 

Happy American Day

Happy Fourth of July! I say that as opposed to Happy Independence Day to my fellow Americans because although I am certain that today is July 4 I’m not sure if we weren’t supposed to celebrate our independence yesterday, thus insuring the federal employees their well deserved three day weekend, because what good is getting a holiday off if it is a scheduled day off anyway. And as everybody knows even though Congress decided to send King George our intent to be so on this day in 1776, we really didn’t become independent from the Crown until October 19, 1781.
 
So…Happy Something! Happy Saturday if nothing else. I don’t normally post on Saturdays, in fact I think it was more than 8 years ago that I last did this but these are not normal times. This is a particularly not normal American Independence Day weekend with so many Americans taking their freedom to task as opposed to taking it for granted which would make this a particularly normal American Independence Day weekend.
 
continentalflagI can’t say with certainty so somebody please correct me if I misspeak but I feel certain that America is the only nation that qualifies its citizens. We claim we want to be equal. We protest for equality. We write letters and poorly articulated social mode posts demanding equality. And then we differentiate. We have African Americans, Asian Americans, Indigenous Americans, Mexican Americans. Other ethnic groups celebrate being German, Irish, or Polish American. Yet it’s only a small portion of Americans who ever lived anywhere other than America. I guess they would be American Americans. A friend of mine emigrated from Vietnam to Canada before immigrating to the U.S.. Does that make her Asian American or Canadian American? Was she an Asian Canadian before. Are there African Canadians or Scandinavian Canadians? What goes on in the rest of the world? As the son of Italian Americans here, if I relocate to my homeland in the mountains facing the Adriatic would I be an American Italian there?
 
I have a hunch the labels are mostly assigned by those outside the ethnicities to track how well they (the assigners) do something in their mind “special” for one of the assigned. Not ever having been assigned (European American is not an option) I can’t say if they (the assigned) really care much. Maybe it’s more important to be treated respectfully than being called by the “proper” term and still treated like an object to be used for effect.
 
There have been a multitude of posts on social media declaring “This Fourth of July act like an American!” It’s not a horrible idea you know. For all its faults and flaws America, actually Americans do a credible job living up to the standards envisioned 250 years ago. (Yeah, yeah, it’s only been 244. Actually its only been 239 (1781, remember) but it took a few years even back then to get up to speed.) When nobody is watching we typically do the right things. We mostly honor our families, we support the local businesses, we get out to help our neighbors who might have trouble shopping or cleaning or are just lonely. And most of us mostly do that for most anybody without checking IDs or birth certificates. Acting like an American is pretty much like acting human, like the rest of the world. So I too will say, this Fourth of July act like an American! But might I humbly suggest we act that way the other days of the year too.
 
Happy First Saturday of July!
 
 
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A Special Easter Story. Corona-style

Spring time is synonymous with rebirth. Odd that the two big religious spring holidays, Easter and Passover, have so much death associated with them. As I’ve noted before, I mention these because these I know. I’m sure many of the other 4300 and some religions of the world may also ruminate on death during spring’s promise of new life.
 
Christian’s know before we can rejoice in Easter’s glory of Jesus Christ’s resurrection He must die. Today, Holy Thursday, would be the last day He sits, eats, and enjoys the company of friends. Depending on the gospel, the meal Jesus would eat would be the first day of or the day before Passover in that year, which commemorates God passing over over those who marked their lintels with the blood of the sacrificed lamb so they would be spared the killing of the first borns of Egypt.
 
So much death going on while trees are blooming and flowers are starting to open to the increasingly warming sun. But if not for the despair how would we make joy?
 
We are going through our own versions of events that made Easter and Passover the redemptive celebrations they are. And we may be doing a fairly poor job of it. Not even considering the (hopefully) extreme approaches of those who routinely add comments to the end of online news articles placing blame on anybody they dislike or disagree with, the (hopefully) typical approach of self-isolation is with, at best, reluctance. We all look for a reason to go out, a new definition of essential, or any opportunity to “exercise.”
 
The Christian belief of the events of today include Jesus washing of the feet of the disciples. Often lost in the other preparations for Easter, secular and religious, the story of the washing of the feet is one of the  most important lessons of the Bible. It is not only a symbol of humility and service but of love, the unconditional love that is expected of us. “Love one another as I have loved you.” Certainly without a thought of reward but also without complaining or devolving into a litany of “why me’s.
 
Never in our lifetimes has society as a whole been as preoccupied with the day it will be all over so we can truly celebrate. Would we not appreciate the celebration even more by truly denying ourselves of worldly pleasures now? We could not find better examples than those in our faiths, whatever you call yourself or whomever you follow, and deny yourself so you can love each other now and trust that there will be a later when when you celebrate with affirmation that as you have loved, you are loved.
 
Before we can celebrate the joy we must recognize the death. Before we can celebrate freedom we must experience denial. Before we can think about what it will be like when this is all over we must accept that it isn’t just yet. But it will be. This is our great sacrifice that will lead to our great relief. And it is a great opportunity to love your neighbor. No exceptions. 
 
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Read All About It

Today is Read Across America Day, and to celebrate I’m going to write less and read more. So listen up! This will be short and hopefully sweet.
 
Read Across America Day was first celebrated in 1998 to call attention to … are you ready? maybe you should be sitting down … reading in America! It is to be celebrated on the school day closest to Dr. Seuss’s birthday (Theodor Geisel, March 2).
 
Here’s the thing about Read Across America Day. You don’t have to be in school, you don’t have to be American, you don’t even have to read in rhymes. I guess that’s three things. Well, here’s a fourth. You can keep reading even after today!
 
Read to your kids, grandkids, nieces and nephews, parents, pets, or even yourself. Reading is fun and educational, and books look good on the shelf. But they look better propped open, the words shared with a friend. So go read something now that this post’s reached its end.
 
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Not my library. Wish it was.

 
 

Happy Birthday, By George!

how to draw birthday balloons Awesome Birthday Cake Drawing Cartoon at GetDrawings
In honor of today’s pretend holiday I slept late, had a big breakfast, and did not go to work. Just like most Mondays around here.
 
When I was working there really were no holidays. And not just the “minor” holidays.  People in health care are used to the idea that any day, any shift, is potential work time. The funny thing is, hospital administration, particularly Human Resources, are often not health care workers and try to insure everyone is treated “fairly” and should not be denied their “time with their families.” As a department head I was responsible for making sure my staff got their time off but still had all my shifts covered. Of course the problem was that as far as their families were concerned, the holidays that were celebrated as families like Thanksgiving or Christmas were celebrated on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Others like Washington’s Birthday weren’t celebrated by them either so who cared when that day off got made. And thus, the “floating holiday” was born. 
 
On one hand it made for a nice surprise sometime during the year to get a day or two off that didn’t require using sick or vacation time. On the other, when would you use it? Did you tack it on to a planned vacation picking up an extra day on the company’s dime? Did you save it for your anniversary and surprise your spouse with a day all his or hers assuming she or he could also get that day off? Did you take it to paint the living room, plant the garden, or sit at the DMV for your picture to be taken for your new driver’s license?
 
I can say with scientific certainty after years of study on the subject those who are graced with a floating holiday will most often use it to celebrate a birthday. Often their own birthdays with spa days, shopping days, drinking days, or overeating days. But just as often for a birthday in the family. A young child who didn’t get to see Mommy or Daddy on Christmas morning but here they are now on the child’s own birthday morning and staying together all day long. A parent who gave up many of his or her own birthdays and holidays to work extra shifts or second jobs to send Junior through college and watch him fulfill his dream of working with the sick now finds Junior planning a surprise party for his parent’s milestone 75th birthday. A spouse who keeps a supply of cards and candles when Hubby comes home and says “don’t forget we have that birthday party to go to tonight” comes home from work to find Hubby putting the finishing touches her birthday dinner all on his own. These were often the days people took off for their “celebrate with your family floating holiday” days. 
 
Although we often didn’t get days off to party with Martin Luther King or George Washington we got to celebrate with some pretty special people. So Happy Birthday George, and thanks for all the days you gave me and my family over the years.
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Have a Heart, Please

For such a short month with only 28 days, 29 this and every Presidential election year affording candidates an additional 24 hours to make fools of themselves, February is chock full of imposters, sequels, and me too holidays.
 
The most famous of non-holidays comes up next week but has been in full fledged celebration by car dealers, furniture stores, and discount houses for weeks now. Of course that is the never authorized, not recognized Presidents Day.  Not being an official national holiday has not stopped business from taking advantage of consumers with “the biggest savings of the year” nor unions taking advantage of businesses with demands of yet another day off with pay. Of course the real holiday is Washington’s Birthday, never celebrated on his actual birthday because that would mean the loss of a 3 day weekend in most years. Bonus points for anybody who can identify Washington’s actual birthday without Google.
 
Looking for a reason to drink to excess and St. Patrick’s Day is a whole month away. Don’t fret or fear, Mardi Gras is here. What started out a few hundred years ago as a day of atonement and confession before Lent begins has morphed into “let’s eat everything in sight, have parades all day, drink all night, and show our boobs (pardon me) in exchange for a string of plastic beads.” Although the date varies because Ash Wednesday varies because Easter varies (you remember those days, right?), it most often is during February that merchants along Bourbon Street grease the poles outside their establishments to deter drunken idiots from trying to climb them.
 
For 134 years a peace loving furry woodland creature has been forecasting Spring’s arrival in a quaint Pennsylvania town. Of course this is commemorated in the most important day in the modern calendar, February 2, Groundhog Day. Sometime, details are sketchy exactly when, meteorologists began celebrating National Weatherman’s Day, now known of course as National Weatherperson’s Day on February 5. There’s logic to this they say. That is the birthday of John Jeffries, purportedly the first to record daily weather observations. That would be fine. Many professions recognize their pioneers. But this year I noticed on February 5 more news snippets decrying Punxsutawney Phil’s bold prediction of an early spring with repeated references to his predictions being accurate only 40% of the time. I did a little research on this. Phil is predicting for 6 weeks! According to National Weather Service data although a 7 day forecast is accurate 80% of the time, a 45 day forecast (about 6 weeks) has an accuracy rate of 40-50%. Hmmm. Methinks and all that jazz. 
 
February is the month of love recognized as National Weddings Month (I would have thought June, no?), Creative Romance Month, and Affair to Remember Month (no clarification if that refers to the movie or a tryst), with International Flirting Week (for the not so serious?) tossed in on the month’s third week. But if those and the chocoholic’s dream date Valentine’s Day don’t fill your bill we can now add, and on this very day, Galentine’s Day. A day with origins similar to and about as real as Festivus and Friendsgiving which are now also apparently really real. And yes, the wanting to be next to be really real, Palentine’s Day is making inroads also. And here all these years I’ve been sitting at home alone without a romantic other half to celebrate. Gee, who would have thought one could make a holiday out of picking up the phone and asking a couple friends to go out for a drink. I would have have missed the boat and called that something like Thursday but then I’d have missed out on the greeting card conscesssions. (Oh yes you can. Check out your local card shop.) 
 
One day in the month that should be a real deal holiday with cards, gifts, TV specials and days off for proper celebrations (with pay if you can swing it) is February 14, no, not the flowers and chocolate day, but National Organ Donor Day. Hop over to organdonor.gov to find out about how organ and tissue donation works and how to register to donate. Ah, the gift of giving your heart to someone. Now that’s true love. And nobody will throw beads at you.
 
 
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