Oh the Golden Rule. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Simplified, love your neighbor as yourself. I love me unconditionally, or as Fred Rogers would be happy to hear, just the way I am. I don’t always like me but I do love me. Mr. Rogers would like it if I liked me just the way I am but if I want to be golden about it, at least I am hitting the loving requirement. And by extension, I love you also.
Clearly a lot of people in the world don’t love each other, but lately there have been a lot of people ignoring Mr. Rogers exhortation to even “like you just the way you are.” Not only that but people are taking exception with anybody who doesn’t even think like they do. Forget “like you just the way you are,” the world is taking the stance “it’s my way or the highway” and telling others to hit the road.
We are getting deep into Gay Pride Month and I have a story you can use to improve your Gay, Race, Ability, Origin, or Any Other Variable score. Fans of Mr. Rogers know he had a variety of residents of and visitors to his Neighborhood. Some of these even non-viewers recognize like Mr. McFeely, King Friday XIII, and Daniel Tiger. Others are not so universally recognized like Handyman Negri, Chef Brocket, and Officer Clemmons.
Francois Clemmons was a gay, black man in 1969. Neither was a popular modifier in 1960s America. But only one was evident. Regardless of his sexual orientation, Officer Clemmons was obviously African American. In an early episode in 1969, Mr. Rogers and Officer Clemmons meet outside in the summer heat and sit together, cooling their feet in a child’s plastic wading pool. A black man and white man in the same pool were almost unheard of in 1969. Yet together they sat. In his final appearance on the show 24 years later, Mr. Rogers and Officer Clemmons cooled their feet in the pool again. It wasn’t as unusual by 1993. The physical difference had become the non-issue for many besides Fred Rogers.
That Francois Clemmons was gay never made the airwaves. Neither did his religion, political party affiliation, or college alma mater. These were differences that didn’t matter. Mr. Rogers liked Officer Clemmons, and Fred liked Francois, just the way he was. He also never mentioned that Officer Clemmons was of a different race. Had it not been visibly noticeable, nobody would have thought it was odd that they shared a moment with their feet in the pool together by the way Mr. Rogers treated and spoke with Officer Clemmons. They would have been just two friends who liked each other. Just the way they were.
We have a hard enough time accepting people who look different to us. Do we really have to add to the difficulties by going out of our ways to find differences to dislike that we can’t even see?
This month, and next, and the one after that, when you run across somebody who you might think is a little different than you are, instead of going out of your way to tell him or her to hit the road, go out of your way and say, “Hi Neighbor. I like you just the way you are.”
To hear Francois Clemmons talk about his experience in the Neighborhood, click here.
Photo John Beale (Pittsburgh City Paper)
The Real Reality Show Blog 
I’d much rather celebrate similarities than focus on differences…and even when differences make themselves obviously known, I question, because those differences represent a learning opportunity for me.
It’s what makes the world go round
Outstanding! Life is too short to focus on and complain about our differences. Love that Mr. Rogers celebrated different and embraced it. Not with arrogance and entitlement, but with gentleness and genuine care. Well done, my friend.
Thank you. Hopefully there’s a little of Mr. Rogers still in all of us.
I’d much rather not even accentuate anything with saying ‘I like you just the way you are’. People are people. I wish we could all get over the so-called differences.
That was his point. The differences are there. They are real. The key to happiness with ourselves and others is not in “accepting” the differences but in not even recognizing them. We don’t need a this pride or that history or so and so day. That just makes this, that, and so and so know there is something different about them that needs “accepted.” We just need to be.